Letters from Frances Longfellow//런던. 1841년 5월 29일.

[모나리자]

사랑하는 엠,
나는 당신을 바라는 오래된, 하지만 새로운 수법을 써왔고, 그래서 그것이 쓸모없는 것에 대한 위로로서, 우리의 좋은 증기선이 며칠 후에 떠날 때 서신을 시작할 것입니다. 그런데, 방금 여기 왔지만 '유아 현상'을 보지 못한 당신의 친구 로저스 부인을 데려옵니다. 유아에 관해서, 당신의 어린아이에 대한 열광이 여기서 얼마나 번창하고 사치스러울까요!

나는 이 공원에서 이 따뜻한 황혼을 즐기고 있었고, 쇼핑몰에서 가끔 탐닉하던 감상적인 방식으로 톰과 함께 녹색 벤치에 앉아 있었고, 우리는 말 그대로 모든 연령대와 계급의 아이들에 무릎까지 빠져 있었습니다. 단정하고 작고 거만하게 걷는 귀족에서 신발도 없고, 드레스 얼룩이 진, 그림 같은 "국민의 아이"까지.

그들은 풀밭에서 뛰어놀고, 데이지를 따고, 공을 던지고, 이 공원이 런던의 유일한 보육원인 것처럼 몰려든 간호사들 주위에 모여 있었습니다. 저는 그들의 우아함과 서로에게 호감을 갖는 방식에 감탄하는 데 지칠 수 없었습니다. 후원, 보호 등에 대한 그들의 싹트는 생각들.

이 모든 것은 영국식 방식이기도 했습니다. 그들의 드레스는 매우 다양하고 예쁘고, 거대한 꼬카드와 모자 장식을 한 아기들, 춤추는 깃털과 반짝이는 단추를 한 소년들. 로널드는 보통 이 즐거운 회사 중 하나이지만 그는 오늘 밤 메리와 로버트와 함께 울리치로 갔고, 우리는 내일 그들과 함께 일요일을 보내고, 시골을 조금 보고, 스콧 씨의 설교를 듣습니다.

그는 리치 부인의 탁월한 목사입니다. 톰과 저는 예배에 맞춰 템즈 강을 따라 증기로 내려가 월요일에 그들과 함께 돌아왔습니다. 이제 게처럼 여러분에게 전해드릴 늦은 회의에 대해 말씀드리겠습니다. 지난번 톰과 저는 (메리는 게으르고 롭은 차를 몰고 나갔음) 켐블 씨네에서 열린 사교 모임에 갔는데, 어떤 면에서는 즐거웠지만, 많은 낯선 사람들 사이에서 우울하게 길을 잃은 기분을 느꼈다고 고백해야겠습니다. 거의 이야기를 나누지 않고 대부분의 시간을 제 생각으로 보냈고, 소개에 대한 영국인의 공포와 프랑스식 친밀감이 부족해서 [p. 2] 말하지 않고, 전에 알던 사람들이 많이 있었지만, 제가 오래전에 기억에서 지워졌을 것이라고 생각하며 첫 접근을 꺼려했습니다.

하지만 살찐, 상냥한 노인 미스 코튼은 제가 존재한다는 것을 담대하게 상기시켰고, 그녀는 영국인들이 당신을 알 때마다 그러하듯이 따뜻하고 예의 바르게 행동했습니다. 우리가 서로를 대하는 방식은 그들에게 매우 차갑고 무관심해 보였을 것입니다. 그들이 제 손을 잡는 따뜻함과 평범한 인사의 인상에 저는 끊임없이 놀랐기 때문입니다.

Ticknor 부인은 영국인 친구들에게서 그걸 물려받은 것 같아요. 그녀가 타고난 게 아니었던 것 같아요. Kenyon은 가슴을 따뜻하게 하는 정도로 그걸 가지고 있고, 어젯밤 옛 친구를 헛되이 찾아다닌 후 그의 붉은 얼굴이 얼마나 반가웠는지 믿을 수 있을 거예요. 그는 모든 사람처럼 활기차고 수다스럽지만, 모든 사람에게 너무 친절해서 한 사람에게 많은 것을 베풀지 않아요.

예를 들어, 그는 나를 보고 기뻐한다는 것을 표현하는 예의 바른 연설을 쏟아냈고, 일부러 왔다는 등의 말을 한 다음, 황태후에게 달려가 버렸어요. Mary는 그가 말하는 방식이 매우 미국적이라고 말하는데, 너무 빠르고 짧은 시간에 너무 많은 것을 쑤셔넣는다고 해요. 대부분의 영국인은 당신에게 아이디어를 줄 수 있는 수고를 하지 않고, 즐겁게 하려고 하지 않으며, 마음이 움직일 때만 쉽고 부주의한 문장을 내뱉어요.

.하지만 그들은 낯선 사람에게서 호기심 많은 호기심을 더 좋아합니다.그것은 참신하기 때문입니다.그리고 Milnes는 Tom에게 Sumner가 주로 이것 때문에 많은 존경을 받았다고 말했습니다.그는 어젯밤에 거기에 있었지만 Tom이 그와 이야기할 때 그의 옆모습을 재빨리 보았을 뿐입니다.그는 팔을 들고 Miss Kemble의 노래에 박자를 맞추는 방식으로 다양한 허세를 부렸다고 말합니다.그는 그를 외모로 보면 Prof와 비슷하다고 생각합니다.

그는 아마도 시인들과 함께 한 아침 식사에 대한 훌륭한 이야기를 들려줄 것입니다.그들은 녹차와 소다수로 만든 병든 자식을 서로에게 불어넣을 수 있는 동지애를 가지고 있을 것입니다.한 명은 소설을 읽는 아가씨들에게 [sic] 최고 수준의 이름을 가진 사람입니다.Aubrey de Vere!Milnes는 [p. 3] 그룹에서 가장 밝은 스타로, 그의 뮤즈를 고상하게 만들 수 있는 부와 지위를 가지고 있으며, 그녀가 부엌의 처녀일지라도 그녀를 예의 바르게 보이게 할 수 있습니다.

그녀를 폄하하려는 것은 아니지만, Stackpole의 말처럼, 그녀는 본래 좋은 점이 많다고 생각합니다. 하지만 그녀는 아마도 불필요하게 태만한 태도를 취했을 것입니다. 그는 "l'enfant gaté de la fortune"이라는 그의 동료 시인 중 한 명이 계란을 먹으며 말했듯이요. 이 모호한 칭찬은 당신이 가난한 사람에게 자선의 조각을 줄 생각이 있다면 Sumner에게 말할 수 있을 겁니다.

내가 할 수 있는 전부이고, 이것은 아주 무해한 음식이지만, 그에게는 만나와도 같으며, 당신이 시주하는 일을 좋아한다면, 내가 우연히 발견할 수 있는 그의 친구들에 대한 모든 통지를 나눠주는 게 낫습니다. 당신이 그를 그런 사소한 친절 때문에 좋아한다는 걸 압니다. 게다가 그것들이 멈춤을 채울 수도 있고, Basil Montague나 Lord Denma에 대한 언급을 해서 당신에게 내면의 멍이라는 '슬픈 이야기'를 끌어내릴 위험을 감수하지 않을 거라고 확신하세요. 자주 반복되는 생각의 소리는 아픈 곳을 누르는 것과 같기 때문입니다. 긍정적인 내부적 부상에 대해 아쉽게도 만병통치약은 없습니다.

저도 그레이 씨가 어젯밤에 "불쌍한 고양이..."라는 그의 자극적인 농담에 웃음의 유령을 되살리려 했을 때 그렇게 느꼈습니다! 하지만 이런 여담에서 켐블스로 돌아가서요. 밀네스보다 더 훌륭한 사람들이 많이 있었지만 저는 많은 사람을 만나지 못했습니다. 피아니스트인 할람과 리츠[sic]는 이전에는 뚱뚱하고 남자답고 개방적인 얼굴을 가졌고, 이후에는 가늘고 가죽처럼 창백하며 깡마른 머리카락을 가졌지만 천재적인 모습을 가졌습니다. 버틀러 부인은 저를 늙은 로저스에게 소개했습니다. 다소 끔찍한 말투로, 그 목적을 위해 고립된 부도아르에서 휴식을 방해했습니다.

그는 멍청한 방식으로 중얼거렸고, 그의 컴프는 내 손을 계속 누르고 있었고, 나는 그가 일어나면 내 발치에 산산이 조각날 것이라고 생각하며 더 단단히 잡기 위해 기꺼이 내주었다. 이 세상의 가장자리에서 너무나 약하게 비틀거리며 그와 그의 쾌활함은 전기를 발생시키는 듯했다. 그는 메리에게 미스 월리스를 보고 죽었다고 말했지만, 처음이었을 리는 없었다.

미스 켐블의 인물과 목소리는 내가 그녀를 본 이후로 놀랍게 확장되었고 이탈리아화되었다. 그녀는 엄청난 활력과 프리마돈나 효과로 노래하고, 그녀의 고전적인 눈썹과 켐블의 눈이 그것을 미세하게 돕지만 그녀의 목소리[p. 4]는 그 기후에 의해 포도처럼 달콤하게 익은 진정한 이탈리아인의 부드러운 풍부함이 없지만, 무대에서 많은 것을 말해야 하며 가장 능숙하게 관리된다.

B 부인은 여동생의 목소리와 외모에 감탄에 휩싸인 듯했고, 그녀 자신도 최상의 모습을 보이고 있으며, 그녀가 엄청나게 애무받고 이제는 집에 있는 것 같은 느낌을 받는 사회에서 훨씬 더 편안한 태도를 보이고, 남편이 있어서 그녀의 입장은 그 어느 때보다 여기에서 더 기분 좋지만, 그는 그들이 모욕을 주지 않고는 차별을 할 수 없다고 말하면서 그런 끊임없는 방탕함에 지쳤다고 가장합니다.

우리는 최근에 너무 더워서 초대장이 없어서 기뻤습니다. 지난주에 웨지우드에서 가족 만찬 파티만 했고 레이첼의 티켓은 구할 수 없었습니다. 우리는 다음 주 금요일에 그녀를 위해 티켓을 구해야 합니다. 하지만 저는 그녀에 대한 좋은 인상이 "기억의 호박"에 너무 강하게 남아 있어서 새로운 인상을 얻고 싶지 않습니다.

수요일은 엡섬에서 더비 데이였습니다. 메리는 용기가 없었지만, 로버트의 사촌이자 멋진 아가씨, 미스 기포드, 레이디 올더슨의 조카딸이 그녀를 방문하고 있다는 것을 알게 된 저는 단호하게 저와 톰을 우리의 작고 낮은 페이톤을 타고 R이 그곳으로 운전하는 데 맡겼습니다. 순진한 외모는 경마장의 무자비한 단골 손님에게 호감을 얻었을 것입니다. 하지만 학교에서 가장 어린 소년이 다른 모든 소년에게 faggot이 되는 경향이 있듯이

화려한 재킷을 입은 포스틸리온[sic]과 왕관을 쓴 망치 천을 쓴 모든 멋진 전차와 '4인승 클럽'의 거대한 마차는 차량의 압박이 심해지면 우리를 들이받거나 줄을 서지 못하게 하려는 다양한 귀족적 의도를 보였습니다. 차량이 도착하기 전에 3마일 동안 압박이 심해져서 신경이 다소 불편한 긴장 상태에 빠지게 됩니다.

평소보다 더 많은 사람이 모였고, 인간과 짐승의 창조물이 웅장하게 드러났습니다(그들은 그런 장소에서 거의 하나가 됩니다). 하지만 그 어떤 것도 저를 다시 3마일의 공포를 겪게 만들지 못했습니다. [p. 5] 불쌍한 미스 기포드는 무섭게 두려워했고 그럴 이유가 있었습니다. 말들이 그녀의 보닛을 으르렁거리고 뒤따르는 마차의 기둥이 우리를 거의 꿰뚫었기 때문입니다. 로버트의 훌륭한 운전만이 우리를 사고로부터 구해주었습니다. 런던 전역이 한 도로에 있었고, 톨게이트에 의해 끊임없이 막히고 빽빽이 들어차 있었기 때문에 상상할 수 있듯이 엄청난 양의 생명이 갇혔습니다.

하지만 다행히도 말들은 매우 잘 훈련되어서 매우 필요한 만큼 털끝까지 체크를 따랐습니다. 기병대(대부분 베일을 쓰고 있어 우스꽝스러운 효과!)가 들판을 가로질러 달려가는 것은 쇼의 아름다운 부분이었고, 말 옆에서 나는 기수들의 잘생긴 외모에 감탄했습니다. "잉글랜드와 영국인"은 확실히 모든 종류의 신체적 아름다움에 대한 손바닥을 가지고 있기 때문입니다. 하지만 Motley의 지적 특징은 아직 보지 못했습니다.

문학인들이 주로 모이는 Kembles에서 Tom과 나는 그 남자들의 거만한 표정과 태도에 충격을 받았습니다. Tom Davis의 삐걱거리는 원형 Charley가 거기에 있었는데, Mac의 익살스러운 친구가 Mrs Jameson에 대해 말했듯이, "그의 머리카락은 책을 읽은 후에도 오래도록 붉어질 것입니다."라고 말할 수 있습니다.

우리가 마침내 안전하게 도착한 Epsom에서의 달리기는 아름답고, 군중과 골무꾼의 손이 닿지 않는 그랜드 스탠드에서 잘 보였습니다. 나는 이 유연하고 우아한 생물들이 마치 사지를 자유롭게 움직이는 것처럼 벨벳 잔디 위로 쉽게 떨어지는 것을 보고 경외감에 숨을 참았습니다(경마장에서는 이상한 감정이겠지만). 그리고 그 순간 의심, 희망, 당황, 아마도 [삭제됨: 파멸] 절망이 얼마나 집중되어 그 평야에 몰려든 수천 명의 인간의 마음을 흔들고 있는지 생각했습니다.

그리고 바다와 같은 쉰 중얼거림이 반짝이는 군중에서 일어났습니다. 감정의 조수가 오르락내리락하면서. 위험은 매우 컸고, 가장 인기 있는 말(대관식)이 더비에서 이길 것이라는 계산이 너무 치명적이었고, 가장 인기 있는 말에 베팅하는 사람은 거의 없었습니다. 시원한 저녁의 귀환(7월의 태양과 더위를 겪었기 때문에)은 즐거웠습니다. 푸른 울타리 줄을 지나, 그리고 우리를 바라보려고 나온 예쁜 빌라를 지나, 아무리 잘생기고 우리를 가장 우아하게 바라보는 수많은 인간의 얼굴을 뚫어지게 쳐다보는 것은 매우 지루했습니다.

그런 날은 모든 개성을 너무나 비참하게 짓밟아서 우리의 허영심은 작은 페들링턴을 위해 큰 소리로 괴로워하며 울부짖습니다! 하지만 엡섬은 그만하고 –
[p. 6] 우리는 얼마 전에 제임슨 부인을 매력적으로 방문했습니다. 켄싱턴 정원 바로 너머에 있는 아늑한 작은 집에서 그녀를 발견했습니다. 그리고 새와 나뭇가지가 창문으로 엿보이는, 예술적으로 덩그러니 세워진 아늑한 작은 방에서 그녀를 발견했습니다.

그녀의 여가 시간이었고, 그녀는 내가 미국에서 그렇게 존경했던 자유롭고, 우아하고, 진심 어린, 그리고 시적인 흐름으로 이야기했습니다. 그녀의 풍부하고, 충만한 정신과 마음이 그녀의 입술에서 넘쳐흐르고, 가장 달콤한 음색도 있었습니다. 그것은 내가 다시 한번 되살리고 싶어하는 지적인 즐거움이었습니다. 그녀는 동물적 매력과 그것을 믿거나 믿지 않는 데 있어서 그녀가 가진 동등한 어조에 대해 많은 이야기를 했습니다. 그녀는 그것에 대한 관심이 여기에서 크게 부활했으며 많은 계급의 여성들이 환자를 찾아온다고 말합니다!

부트 부부는 최근에 끔찍한 뇌우 속에서 우리와 함께 차를 마셨고, 노부인과 나는 보스턴 사람들에 대해 이야기를 나누었습니다. 그녀는 당신을 최대한 칭찬했습니다. 메리 부트는 세련되고, 예쁘고, 지식이 풍부한 처녀로 자랐고 다른 모든 아이들은 사랑스럽습니다. 하지만 당신이 그들을 모른다는 것을 잊었습니다.

5월 31일 나는 방금 울리치에서 돌아왔어, 내 사랑아. 그리고 나중에 네 순교한 눈에 더 많은 고문을 가할 때까지 공원에서 이 따뜻한 햇살을 마주하고 싶지 않아. 용서를 구하기 위해 그들의 눈꺼풀에 키스할게. 내 귀에는 가장 이상한 소리의 혼합물이 있고, 새들이 '이렇게 즐거운 숲에 혼자 있는 것처럼' 즐겁게 지저귀고, 마찬가지로, 느긋하게 쉬고 있는 유행을 따라가는 도시 마차의 무겁고 끊임없는 덜거덕거림이 들려.

아, 네가 여기 있다면 나는 우리의 경고를 올리버 트위스트에게 보내서 페이톤을 달라고 할 거야. 그리고 우리도 [삭제: 우리] 비틀거리며 따라가서, 시선을 마주치고, 그리고 너는 영국 여성들이 멋지게 옷을 입고 영국 남성들이 수천 명에게 보이고, 까다로운 두 미국인의 마음을 결코 훔칠 수 없다는 것을 인정해야 해! 그리고 그들이 다스리는 짐승과 그들이 짓밟는 지구보다 얼마나 더 사랑스러운지 봐야 해.

내가 당신이 내 팔 길이에 있다면 당신의 약한 마음을 놀라게 하고 기쁘게 하지 않겠는가? 하지만 나는 그것만을 신경 쓰지 않는다. "남자는 나를 기쁘게 하지 않는다. 여자도 마찬가지다." 왜냐하면 나는 메리의 영국적 편견을 해소하기 위해 경멸을 표하고 싶어지기 때문이다!

당신은 그녀의 미국식 편견에 대한 전면적인 비난[p. 7]에 웃을 것이다. 그녀의 공정하고 활기찬 마음은 영국적 성격의 광범위하고 남성적인 특성과 엄격한 도덕 문화의 쉽고 강력한 발전을 만족스럽게 파악했다. 그녀는 내 생각에 그것이 더 두드러진 이유는 항상 악과 싸우기 때문이고, 반면에 우리는 그것이 자연스럽게 자라며 계속해서 'me voiçi'라고 말할 필요가 없기 때문이다.

하지만 우리가 울위치에서 보낸 일요일이 얼마나 좋았는지 말해주겠다. 강을 따라 증기선을 타고 내려가는 것은 매우 재밌습니다. 런던 사람으로 가득 찬 증기선이 해안을 따라 끊임없이 지나가고, 진흙투성이의 Father Thames 강둑에 갈색의 기이한 모양의 집들이 그림처럼 모여 있고, Somerset House는 베네치아처럼 보이려고 노력하고, Tower와 St Pauls는 그 위로 높이 솟아 있고, 여러 고귀한 다리 아래로 쓸고 지나가며, 각각의 아치 아래로 굴뚝을 떨어뜨리고, Don Giovanni의 동상 머리처럼, 그리고 이곳에 모인 선박의 빽빽한 숲을 헤치며 길을 잡습니다.

우리는 영국의 희생자들을 위해 그리니치의 웅장한 궁전을 잠깐 둘러보았습니다(나는 그들의 난로 옆에서, 그들 마을의 영웅들이 '반짝이는 슬픔'에 갇힌 것보다 훨씬 행복할 것이라고 생각합니다). 그리고 W에 도착했습니다.

Scott 씨가 강하고 독창적인 생각과 감정의 설교를 하는 것을 들을 수 있었습니다. 그것은 내가 물 이쪽에서 찾기를 바랐던 것보다 더 영혼을 만족시켜 주었습니다. 그는 리치 부인과 그녀의 친구 미스 팬터(제가 듣기 좋아하는 현명하고 독실한 여성)의 후원을 받았지만, 저는 반대자였기 때문에 매주 일요일에 그를 듣기 위해 찾아오는 이 작은 예배당에서만 청중을 만날 수 있었습니다. 그곳은 아름다운 시골 언덕 위에 있는 작고 아담한 별장으로, 메리, 베이비, 그리고 저로 구성된 우리 모두가 잠시 자리를 잡았습니다.

오후에는 Common의 잔디밭에 누워서 다양한 주제에 대해 느긋하게 이야기를 나누며 Stockbridge를 떠올렸고, 평소처럼 향기로운 울타리를 지나 언덕 위로 여러분을 데려가고 싶었습니다(거기서 우리는 많은 빨간 코트를 입은 사람들이 그들의 아가씨들과 함께 문과 구불구불한 골목길을 감상적으로 바라보는 것을 보았습니다). 그리고 여러분이 아래에 펼쳐진 푸른 바다를 보고 감탄하는 것을 들었습니다. 항상 그렇듯이 은빛 안개와 넓고 구불구불한 템스 강은 배로 가득 차 있었고, 그 너머에는 거대한 심장의 주요 동맥이 있었습니다. 세인트 폴이 그것을 배신했습니다. [8쪽] 여러분이 본 적 없는 것에 대한 설명으로 여러분을 지치게 한다면 말씀해 주십시오.

여행자들은 자신의 인상을 강화하는 것, 즉 그것에 대해 이야기하는 것이 다른 사람에게는 반드시 두 번째 시야를 갖게 하는 오류에 빠지기 쉽습니다.

무엇에 대해 써야 할지 말씀해 주십시오. 사물이나 사람 또는 주로 나 자신에 대해; 후자에 대해서는 집에서 당신을 너무 심하게 대했기 때문에 여기서 하는 것이 뉘우칩니다. 시골에서 조용할 때 여기에서 생겨나는 의견에 대해 더 자세히 설명할 수도 있습니다. 당신이 듣고 싶어한다면요. 저는 리치 부인을 빨리 사랑하게 되었습니다.

그녀는 매우 드문 노파입니다. 머리와 마음의 힘이 강하고, 몸의 활력도 강하고, 제가 준비하지 못했던 관대함과 감정의 공정함 - 특히 종교 문제에 대해. 그녀는 성공회도 아니고 칼바니스트도 아니지만, 어떤 이름으로 불리든 좋고 광범위하고 진실한 모든 것에 귀를 기울입니다.

그녀는 패니 웨지우드보다 로널드를 더 귀여워합니다. 패니 웨지우드는 돌봐야 할 병아리가 있습니다. 바브의 많은 매력을 설명하는 것은 소용이 없습니다. 햇빛처럼 변하기 때문입니다. 하지만 가장 두드러진 것은 선량함입니다.

그는 때때로 로버트와 매우 비슷합니다. 나는 그가 메리에게 속한다고는 아직 거의 생각하지 않는다. 왜냐하면 현명한 엄마처럼 그녀는 그를 쓰다듬는 데 모든 시간을 희생하지 않고, 유모는 그렇게 어린 아기의 진정한 어머니이기 때문이다. M.은 시골 공기에 활력을 얻은 울위치에서 매우 건강하고 강해 보였고, 아마도 2주 후에 우리도 이 바벨과 틈새를 울타리 옆에서 떠날 것이다.

그들은 스코틀랜드로의 여행을 생각하지만, 나중에 그들이 우리를 리버풀에 내려줄 수 있을 때, 도중에 가거나 돌아올 때. 나는 여자답게 내 편지의 끝에 사업을 넣었다. 나는 얼마 전에 다양한 종류의 성경을 살펴보았지만 2권에서는 아무것도 발견하지 못했다.

이제 아주 좋은 인쇄본을 위해서는 큰 것이 필수적이지만, 1권은 다루기 힘들고, 가족적인 느낌이고, 여행하기에는 나쁘고, 그래서 당신이 원하는 크기를 알려주기 전까지는 구매하지 않습니다. 2권으로 명확히 구분해서(그들이 나를 위해 하나를 묶을 테니까요) 그리고 Apocrapha[sic]가 있든 없든, 중요한 사실들은 당신에게서 얻는 것을 현명하게 생략했습니다.

[p. 9] 6월 1일 어젯밤, 사랑하는 사람아, 나는 메리와 함께 지질학자 Mr. Lyell의 작은 파티에 갔어. 그는 그의 아내와 함께 매우 예쁘고 기분 좋은 작은 여성으로, Mrs. George Dexter처럼, 다음 겨울 보스턴에서 보낼 예정이고, 나는 그가 좋아할 것이라고 생각해. 그는 외모는 축소된 Spurzheim이나 Grattan이지만 두뇌는 넓다.

어둡고 음침했고(그들은 허세가 많은 사람들이 아니었기 때문에) 예상했던 대로 빵 대신 돌을 주지는 않았지만, 웨이터 한 명이 레모네이드를 주는 허약한 쇼로 충분했습니다! 이런 어두운 파티는 조용하고 편안하게 이야기하기에 좋지만, 옷차림이나 안색을 과시하기에는 적합하지 않습니다. 모두가 가능한 한 많은 단어를 쏟아내려고 양심적으로 강요받는 것처럼 보이는 우리의 눈부시고 시끄러운 모임 이후에 저는 이런 느긋하고 태연한 분위기를 더 좋아합니다.

거기에는 독일인처럼 보이는 과학적인 이마가 많이 있었는데, 아마도 어떤 현명한 방법으로 유명해졌을 것입니다. 저는 틱노어에 대해 물어본 평범하고 친절한 노부인 미스 로저스를 소개받았습니다. 우리는 그녀의 취미인 우리 공원(리젠트)에 대한 존경의 동정심을 즉시 품었습니다.

그녀는 친절하게 저를 초대해서 그녀의 그림을 보러 왔는데, 그녀의 그림은 그녀의 형제들과 비슷하지만 공통점은 거의 없다고 생각합니다. 저는 아직 맥의 사촌 레이디 올더슨을 보지 못했습니다. 지난 토요일에 초대를 거절했지만, 그녀는 가까운 이웃입니다.

이 거리는 너무 지치네요! 파티는 10시 이후에 시작되고, 그 후 몇 마일을 운전해서 밤의 절반을 거리에서 보냅니다. 내일 밤은 레이디 잉글리스와 켐블스에 도착했는데, 그곳에서 이전보다 더 집에 있는 것 같은 기분을 느낄 수 있기를 바랍니다.

톰은 그레이 씨를 윈저로 데려가서 '이튼 몬템'을 보러 가라고 했지만 여왕이 거기에 있을 예정이었지만 나는 너무 게을러서 쇼핑도 해야 하고 스티븐슨 부인을 방문해야 해서 그를 따라갈 수가 없었다.

내 사랑, 무슨 일인가? 홀에서 틱노라이즈를 하거나 브루클린에서 "구스베리 덤불 아래에서 애벌레처럼 사는 삶"(패니 켐블이 너무나 매력적이다)을 살 생각인가? 너의 사랑하는 두뇌와 심장 속의 조수의 모든 변동을 적어 줘, 편지에서 너의 고동을 느끼게 해 줘. 그것이 어떻게 뛰는지 알고 싶어. 솟구쳐 오르는 모든 위안의 생각으로 나를 위로해 줘, "알렉산더처럼 나는 옳고, 나는 홀로 통치할 것이다"라고 하는 내면의 세계에서, 더 진실한 군주가 있다면 폐위될 때까지.

나는 여기 내 모든 사랑하는 사람들과 함께 매우 축복받았고, 진심으로 신께 감사드리지만, 당신의 사랑에 덜 엄격하지 않습니다. 왜냐하면 그것은 이 모든 것보다 더 독점적으로 내 것이고, 나의 실패에 더 관대하며, 메리의 사랑이 다시는 될 수 없는 것보다 더 나의 전부이기 때문입니다. 나는 그것의 한 방울도 아끼지 않습니다. 그것이 넘치는 것을 막지 마십시오. 그것은 나에게 성수처럼 소중하고, 모든 악의 영향을 몰아냅니다.

샘이 이런 감정에 걸려 넘어지지 않도록 하십시오. 고대 선원처럼 나는 당신을 모르게 축복하지만 우리가 기도할 때처럼 엿듣는 것을 질투합니다. 그러나 그와 당신의 아버지께 내 친절한 인사를 전하십시오. 그리고 당신이 그것을 퍼뜨리고 싶어하는 다른 사람에게도 전하십시오. 신께서 나의 보물인 당신을 계속 축복하고 모든 종류의 악과 슬픔으로부터 보호해 주시기를 바랍니다. 생명에 묶인 진정한 팬 -

[p. 10 위] 저는 이것을 Judkins 대위에게 직접 전달해 달라고 보냅니다. 그러면 그는 종종 건강을 위해 술을 마셨던 시가의 여인을 볼 기회를 얻을 수 있을 것입니다. "주 의사당 주변에서" - 다시 한번 안녕, 달콤하게
Mary, Robert & Tom이 따뜻한 추억을 전합니다 -

[10쪽 아래] Ronald가 방금 당신의 캠브릭 모슬린 드레스를 입고 입장했습니다. 드레스는 멋지게 만들어졌고 이 따뜻한 날씨에 그에게 매우 유용합니다. 저는 당신의 케이프 숄을 한 번만 입었습니다(Coltman 여사의 점심 식사 때). 하지만 그것이 당신의 가슴 위에 종종 접혀져 있었던 것처럼 기쁘게 생각합니다. 그것으로 충분할 것 같습니다!
[1쪽 십자가]

Nat 이모를 만나면 Wormley 부인이 방금 도착했고 제가 그녀의 상자를 그녀 손에 직접 전달했다고 전해 주십시오.
울위치에서 나는 달빛 아래에서 처음으로 나이팅게일을 들었지만, 그것은 거의 들리지 않는 외로운 콱콱거리는 소리에 불과했습니다. 그것은 마치 밤의 숨결 같거나 달에 대한 차분한 찬송가 같았습니다.
주소: E. 오스틴 양 / 샘 오스틴 담당 / 41 BEACON ST. / 보스턴, 미국 / 캡틴 저킨스의 카드.

----------------------------

London. May 29th 1841.

Dearest Em,
I have been at my old, & yet new, trick of wishing for you, & so, as consolation for its inutility, will begin an epistle as our good steamer goes in a few days; bringing back, by the way, your friend Mrs Rogers who has just been here but whose ‘infant phenomenon’ I have not seen. À propos of infants, how your mania for the wee folk would thrive & luxuriate here!

I have been enjoying this warm twilight in the Park, sitting with Tom on a green bench after the sentimental fashion we sometimes indulged in in the Mall, & we were literally knee-deep in children of every age & rank from the tidy, little, strutting patrician to the shoe-less, frock-stained, picturesque “child of the people.”

They were frolicking on the grass, plucking daisies, throwing ball, or grouped about their nurses who throng this Park as if it were the only nursery in London. I could not weary of admiring their grace & winning ways to each other; their sprouting notions of patronage, protection &c.

All this after an English way too; then their dresses are so various & pretty, babies with huge cockades & cap-frills, & boys with dancing feathers & shining buttons. Ronald is usually one of this merry company but he has accompanied Mary & Robert to Woolwich to-night, where we join them tomorrow to pass Sunday, see a bit of rurality & hear Mr Scott preach.

He is Mrs Rich’s pastor par excellence. Tom & I steam it down the Thames in the mn’g in time for service & return hither with them on Monday. Now for my late proceedings which I will give you in a crab-like fashion. Last ev’g Tom & I (Mary being lazy & Rob driving out) went to a soirée at Mr Kemble’s which was delightful in some respects though I must confess I felt dismally lost among so many strangers, having little talk but with my own thoughts the greater part of the ev’g, from this English horreur of introductions & lack of the French bonhomie to speak [p. 2] without, recognizing too, may people I knew there formerly but unwilling to make the first advances thinking it likely I was blotted from their memories long ago.

One fat, good-natured old soul Miss Cottin however, I boldly reminded of my existence & she was at once all warmth & brimming over with civility as the English are whenever they do know you. Our manner to each other must seem very frigid & indifferent to them, for I am constantly startled by the warmth with which they grasp my hand & the impressment of an ordinary greeting.

Mrs Ticknor has, I think, caught it from her English friends for I believe she had it not naturally? Kenyon has it to a heart-warming degree & you can believe how welcome his ruddy face was to me last night after vainly seeking an old friend. He is as brisk & chatty as every but is too kind to every-body to bestow much upon one.

Par exemple, he poured forth a flood of civil speeches expressive of his pleasure at seeing me, that he had come on purpose &c & then dashed off to faire l’aimable to a Dowager. Mary says he is very American in his way of talking, so rapid & cramming so much into a short time, for most Englishmen wont take the trouble to give you there ideas & never care to entertain, dropping out there easy, careless sentences when the spirit moves them only.

But they rather relish an eager enquiring spirit in a stranger, from its novelty & Milnes told Tom that Sumner won so much regard from this mainly. He was there last night but I caught but a hasty glimpse of his profile when Tom was talking to him, who says he performed divers affectations in the way of beating time to Miss Kemble’s singing with his arms raised &c. He thinks him like the Prof in looks.

He will probably give you a fine account of his breakfast with a knot of poets, a camaraderie probably to puff each other’s sickly offspring of green tea & soda water. One, with a name to [sic] high water mark for novel reading damsels – Aubrey de Vere! Milnes is [p. 3] the brightest star of the group with wealth & station to ennoble his Muse with, & make her seem courtly if she be but a kitchen-wench.

Not that I mean to disparage her, for, to speak à la Stackpole, she has many good points by nature, I think, though she affects the lackadaisacal [sic] unnecessarily perhaps, he being, “l’enfant gaté de la fortune” as one of his fellow bards said over an egg; which dubious compliment you may tell Sumner if you are inclined to give the poor man a scrap of charity.

It is all I can do & as this is very innocent food, but manna to him, and if you like the office of almoner you had better dole out whatever notices of his friends here I may stumble upon. I know you like him eno’ for such little kindnesses, beside that they may fill up the pauses, & be assured I wont risk any mention of Basil Montague or Lord Denma to draw down upon you the ‘doleful stoure’ of an inward bruise, for the sound of an oft-repeated idea is like a pressure on a sore spot; a positive internal injury for which alas! there is no panacea.

So felt I, when Mr Grey t’other night tried to resuscitate the ghost of a laugh at his galvanized joke of “poor puss…”! But to return from these digressions to the Kembles. There were divers greater folks there than Milnes but I did not find many out. Hallam & Lizts [sic] the pianist, the former stout & with a manly, open countenance & latter slender, leathery pale, with lank hair but a look of genius, were pointed out to me & Mrs Butler introduced me to old Rogers – with rather an appaling speech, disturbing his repose in a secluded boudoir for the purpose.

He muttered in an idiotic way his compts pressing my hand continually which I was willing to yield for a firmer grasp thinking he w’d fall to pieces at my feet when he rose, so feebly tottering on this world’s verge seems he & his very gaiety is galvanic. He told Mary he died when he saw Miss Wallace but it could not have been for the first time.

Miss Kemble’s person & voice have expanded wondrously since I saw her & have become Italianized. She sings with immense vigor & prima donna effect & her classic brows & Kemble eyes aid it finely but her voice [p. 4] has not the mellow richness of a true Italian one ripened into sweetness by that climate like their grapes -, yet it must tell much on the stage & it is most skillfully managed.

Mrs B. seemed wrapt in admiration of her sister’s voice & looks and she herself is looking her best, & has much more ease of manner in a society where she is immensely caressed & feels now at home, her husband’s presence rendering her position more agreeable here than it has ever been before, but he pretends to be weary of such unceasing dissipation where he says they can make no discrimination without giving offence.

We have been wilting under such heat lately that I rejoiced we were free from invites, having accomplished last week only a family dinner-party at the Wedgwoods, tickets for Rachel being unprocurable. We must get them for her benefit next Friday – though I have one fine impression of her so strongly cased in “the amber of memory” that I hardly care to gain a new one.

On Wednesday was the Derby day at Epsom. Mary had not courage for it, but I, finding I should have the company of a nice damsel & a cousin of Robert’s, Miss Gifford, neice [sic] of Lady Alderson & now on a visit to her, resolutely entrusted myself & Tom to R’s driving thither in our little, low phaeton whose innocent appearance should have plead in its favor with the merciless frequenters of race-courses, but, as the youngest boy at school is apt to become fag to all the rest,

so all the dashing chariots with gay-jacketed postillions [sic] & coroneted hammercloths & the huge coaches of the ‘4-in-hand-Club’ showed divers aristocratic intentions of running us down, or cutting us out of file, when the press of vehicles became severe, which it does for 3 long miles before you arrive there – keeping one’s nerves in a somewhat uncomfortable state of tension.

There was a greater gathering than usual & it was a magnificent show of the human & brute creation (they almost unite at such places) but nothing w’d induce me to undergo again that 3-mile-terror- [p. 5] Poor Miss Gifford was dreadfully frightened & had cause, for horses were champing at her bonnet & the pole of a carriage behind, nearly impaled us; nothing but Robert’s admirable driving saved us from accidents for all London on one road, constantly arrested & crammed together by toll-gates, makes an awful mass of life, as you can suppose,

but, luckily, the horses are so well trained that they obeyed checking to a hair as was very necessary. The army of horsemen (mostly wearing veils ludicrous effect!) scampering over the fields was a pretty part of the show & next to the horses I was in admiration of the good looks of the riders, for “England & the English” certainly bear the palm for physical beauty of all kinds, - but such intellectual features, as Motley’s for instance, I have not seen yet.

At the Kembles, where literary people were chiefly, Tom & I were struck with the snobbish looks & air of the men – Tom Davis’ squeaking prototype Charley was there, of whom it might be said, as it was of Mrs Jameson by a waggish friend of Mac’s, “his hair will be re(a)d long after his books.”

The running at Epsom, where we safely arrived at last, was beautiful & well seen by us from the grand stand, above the reach of rabblement & thimble-riggers. I held my breath with awe (odd feeling as that may seem for a race-course) when I saw these lithe graceful creatures dropping as easily over the velvet turf as if it were a free exercise of their limbs, & thought in that instant of time what a concentration of doubt, hope, dismay, perhaps [crossed out: ruin] despair, was agitating the thousands of human hearts swarming on that plain.

And a hoarse murmur, like that of the sea, arose from the gleaming crowds – as the tides of feeling rose & fell. The stakes were very heavy & bets too calculably disastrous for the Favorite (Coronation) won the Derby & few bet on the favorite. The return in the cool of the ev’g (for we have had our July sun & heat) was delightful, - thro’ the green hedge-rows, & by pretty villas whose occupants were all out to gaze upon us & it grew very tiresome to run the gauntlet of so many human faces, handsome though they were & staring at us most graciously.

Such a day crushes out all personality so lamentably that our vanity cries aloud in its agony for little Peddlington! But enough of Epsom –
[p. 6] We had a charming visit to Mrs Jameson the other day. Found her in a snug little house just beyond Kensington gardens. & in a snug little room most artistically lumbered up, with birds & boughs peeping in the window.

It was her leisure day & she talked in that free, graceful, hearty withal & poetical flow I admired so much in America, - her rich, full mind & heart brimming over at her lips, in the sweetest tones too. It was an intellectual treat I long to renew. She discoursed much upon animal magnetism & the equal tenor she had in believing or disbelieving it. She says an interest in it has been greatly revived here & many ladies of rank patronise patients!

The Bootts drank tea with us lately thro’ a terrible thunder-storm, - & the old lady & I talked over Boston people together, - she chanted your praises in fullest measure. Mary Boott has grown up a stylish, pretty, knowing damsel & all the other children are lovely – but I forget that you know them not.

May 31st I have just returned from Woolwich, my darling, & not caring to encounter this warm sun in the Park till later will inflict further torture on your martyred eyes. I kiss their lids for pardon. There is the strangest medley of sounds in my ear, birds trilling as joyously as if they were ‘alone in wood so gay,’ &, likewise, the heavy & continual rumble of town equipages dragging lounging fashionables thro’ their daily round.

Ah if you were here I would send our alert Oliver Twist for the phaeton & we [crossed out: we] should stumble along too, returning stare for stare, & you should admit Englishwomen can dress well & English men be seen by thousands & steal never a bit of the heart of 2 fastidious Americaines! & you should see how much lovelier than either are the beasts they rule & the Earth they trample underfoot.

What would I not do to astonish & delight yr weak mind had I you but in arm’s reach, but I care not for it alone – “man delights not me, nor women either,” for I am piqued to show disdain to quench Mary’s English prejudices!

You would laugh at her whole-sale denuncia [p. 7] tions of Americanisms, her just & vigorous mind having grasped with satisfaction the broad, manly traits of English character with its easy, strong developments of strict moral culture she forgets, I think, it is more prominent because ever fighting with vice, whereas with us it grows spontaneously & needs not to say ‘me voiçi’ continually.

But I will tell you what a nice Sunday we passed at Woolwich. Steaming down the river is highly amusing with the constant rushing by of steamboats crowded with cockneys airing themselves all along shore, the picturesque huddle of brown oddly shaped houses on either bank of muddy Father Thames, Somerset House trying to look Venetian & the Tower & St Pauls looming high in air above them, the sweeping under the many noble bridges with the dropping of our chimney under each successive arch, like the statues head in Don Giovanni, & picking our way through the bristling forests of shipping here congregated.

We had a passing look at Greenwich’s magnificent Palace for England’s victims (much happier I should fancy by their own fire-sides, heroes of their own villages, than ‘packed up here in a glist’ring grief’ of splendid discomfort) & arrived at W.

in time to hear Mr Scott preach a sermon of strong original thought & feeling which was more soul-satisfying to me than I hoped to find this side the water. He is patronized by Mrs Rich & her friend Miss Fanter – (a sensible, pious woman I like to hear talk) but, being a dissenter, only gets an audience in this small chapel where they come every Sunday to hear him, - having there, on a lovely, rural hill-side, a nice little cottage where we were all packed for the nonce, Mary, Baby & I in the same room.

Our afternoon loll on the grass of the Common, talking dawdlingly of divers topics, recalled Stockbridge &, as usual, I longed to take you up the hill thro’ sweet-smelling hedgerows, (where we met quantities of red-coats with their lassies sentimentalizing over stiles & thro’ winding lanes) & hear you exclaim at the glorious view thereupon [crossed out: of] an ocean of verdure below, softened, as it always is here, by silvery mists, & the broad, winding Thames – freighted with vessells, the main artery of the mighty heart beyond – St Paul’s betraying it – [p. 8] tell me if I tire you with descriptions of things you have never seen.

Travellers [sic] are apt to fall into the error that what strengthens their own impression, namely talking about it, must, perforce, inspire another into second sight.

Tell me what to write you about; things or people or myself mainly; of the latter I have surfeited you so sorely at home that I feel remorse to do it here. When we are quiet in the country I may enlarge upon opinions which spring up here &c if you care to hear them. Mrs Rich I am fast getting to love.

She is a very rare old woman’ such strength of head & heart, such vigour of body too, & what I was not prepared for, such liberality & justness of feeling – particularly on religious matters. She is neither Episcopal, nor Calvanist [sic], but has an open ear to every-thing that is good, far-reaching & true under whatever name.

She pets Ronald even more than Fanny Wedgwood who has chicks of her own to attend to. It is useless to describe to you the Bab’s many fascinations, - they are as shifting as sunlight, - but good-nature is the most prominent.

He is very like Robert at times. I hardly feel, yet, that he belongs to Mary, - for, like a sensible mamma, she does not sacrifice all her time to caressing him & the nurse is the true mother of so young a baby. M. seemed so well & strong at Woolwich, invigorated by country air, that in about a fortnight probably, we shall leave this Babel & niche ourselves by some hedge-side.

They think of an excursion to Scotland, but later, when they can drop us at Liverpool, en route, going or returning. Woman-like I have put business at the tail of my letter. I looked over Bibles the other day of divers kinds but found none in 2 vols.

Now for very good print a large one is essential, but in 1 vol has a cumbersome, family look, bad for travelling &c, &, therefore, I purchase not till informed by you how big you want it – if distinctly in 2 vols (for they will bind one so for me) & whether with the Apocrapha [sic] or not, which important facts I wisely omitted to glean from you.

[p. 9] June 1st Last night, my darling, I went with Mary to a small party at the geologists Mr Lyell, who, with his wife a very pretty pleasing little woman, like Mrs George Dexter, is to pass next winter in Boston & I think will be liked. He is a sort of diminished Spurzheim or Grattan in looks with an expansive brain.

It was dark & dingy (they not being very pretentious people) &, tho’ they did not give us stones for bread as I expected, a feeble show of one waiter of lemonade sufficed! These dark parties are good for quiet, comfortable talking, tho’ not for display of dress & complexion, & after our glaring, noisy gatherings, when every one seems conscientiously impelled to pump out as many words as possible I rather like the easy nonchalant air of these.

There were many Germanic-looking, scientific foreheads there, probably known to fame in some wise way. I was introduced to Miss Rogers, a plain well-meaning old lady who asked after the Ticknors. We at once struck up a sympathy of admiration upon our Park (Regents) which is her hobby.

She kindly invited me to come & see her pictures – which rival her brothers I believe tho’ they have little else in common. I have not yet seen Mac’s cousin Lady Alderson, having refused an invite there for last Saturday, but she is a near neighbor.

These distances are so tiresome! Parties dont begin till after 10. & then you drive miles so that half the night is consumed in the streets. Tomorrow night we got to Lady Inglis’ & the Kembles where I hope to feel more at home than before.

Thom has gone to get Mr Grey to railroad it to Windsor to see ‘Eton Montem’ but tho’ the Queen is to be there I was too lazy to accompany him having some shopping to do too & a visit to Mrs Stevenson on my conscience.

What art about, darling mine? Intending to Ticknorise at the Hole or lead “the life of a caterpillar under a gooseberry bush” (Fanny Kemble th’ot so desirable) in Brookline? Write me every fluctuation of the tides in yr dear brain & heart, let me feel yr pulse in yr letters. for I long to know just how it throbs. Comfort me with every solacing thought that gushes up, in that inner world where, “like Alexander I would right & I would reign alone” till deposed by the true sov’reign if there can be a truer.

I am richly blessed here with all my darlings about me & thank God for it sincerely but grow no less exacting of yr love, for it is mine more exclusively than any of these, is more indulgent to my failings, is more my all than Mary’s ever can be again. I cannot spare a drop of it. Check not its overflow for it is precious to me as holy water &, like that, exorcises all evil influences.

Dont let Sam stumble on this sentiment; like the ancient mariner I bless you unawares but am jealous of being overheard as when we pray. Give him & yr Father my kind regards, however, & to whoever else you care to disperse them. God continue to bless & preserve you, my treasure, from all manner of evil & sorrow –ever yr life-bound & true Fan –

[p. 10 top] I send this to Captain Judkins to deliver in person, that he may run a chance of seeing the lady of the cigars whose health was often drunk by him included in the toast “All round the State House” – Again good bye sweet
Mary, Robert & Tom send warmest remembrances –

[p. 10 bottom] Ronald has just made his entrée in your cambric muslin dress which has been nicely made up & is very useful for him this warm weather. I have only sported your cape shawl once (at Lady Coltman’s lunch) but look at it with pleasure as a having been often folded over your heart. That’ll do I think!
[p. 1 cross]

Will you please tell Aunt Nat when you see her that Mrs Wormley has just arrived & that I have delivered her box into her own hands.
At Woolwich I heard by moonlight my first nightingale but it was only a lone gurgle hardly audible – like the breathing of the Night it seemed or its subdued hymn to the Moon.
ADDRESSED: MISS E. AUSTIN. / CARE OF SAML AUSTIN / 41 BEACON ST. / BOSTON. U.S. A. / CARD BY CAPT JUDKINS.