What’s Holding You Back From Moving Forward?

[soso]

What’s Holding You Back From Moving Forward?
Sharon Jaynes

Today’s Truth

The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say” (Exodus 4:11-12 NIV).

Friend to Friend

When I was six years old, I skipped off /to first grade /with a fresh box of crayons, a crisp green dress / with Swiss polka dots

sleeves, and a fresh hope //that I would be good enough—that someone would at least like me. But first grade only confirmed my fears. I wasn’t good enough after all.

From the time my teacher held up the first spelling flash card, I knew I was in trouble. Back in the day, kindergarten focused

/on coloring, playing, and napping. But first grade was a whole new ballgame with letters, numbers, and words. First grade had

flash cards.

I remember one exercise //that makes my palms clammy even today. We lined our miniature wooden chairs up /in a row

/like a choo-choo train. The conductor, Mrs. Morgan, held up a spelling flash card /for the lead passenger to identify.

* clammy; unpleasantly damp and sticky or slimy to touch.

If he or she could not correctly decipher the word on the card, that passenger lost the lead seat and had to go sit in the

caboose. I spent most of the first grade /in the caboose. I could not spell to save my life.

decipher; convert (a text written in code, or a coded signal) into normal language.

Mrs. Morgan decided that she was going to give me a little extra help. After all, she had taught my brother five years earlier,

and he was pretty smart. Maybe there was hope for me.

She kept me after school /to work on my reading /with another little boy named Mike. I might not have been very bright,

but I was smart enough to figure out what [being singled out with Mike] meant.

For some reason I had particular trouble /with the word “the.” In an effort to help me remember that all-important word, Mrs. Morgan made a nametag that read “t-h-e” and pinned it to my little chest. I had to wear this scarlet letter /for two weeks.

My peers taunted me with words of their own. “Why are you wearing that nametag?” “Is your name ‘The’?” “Are you stupid?”

“What’s wrong with you?”

After two weeks, I learned how to spell the word, “t-h-e,” but that’s not all () I learned. I learned that I was stupid,

just not as smart as everybody else, and once again…not enough.

Fast forward thirty years. Now God was nudging me to write? With words? Words that I had to spell? One of my greatest

weaknesses? One of my insidious sources of insecurity? The very thing // that put the rubberstamp on my greatest fears

so long ago?

The truth is, I was not stupid. I just couldn’t spell very well. Still can’t. And even though I graduated with honors, did well

in college, wrote a passel of books, there are many times I feel like that little girl /sitting in the spelling train caboose.

Isn’t it mindboggling that God will sometimes take our greatest weaknesses and turn them into our greatest strengths?

But that won’t happen /until we let go of the fear of moving forward and take hold of the hand of God /with a grip of trust. We can choose to stay stuck in the caboose, or come up front with the chief engineer.

I’m still not a good speller. However, I am not going to allow my weakness to stand /in the way of my God-given purpose.

I hope you won’t either.

God said to Moses, God said to me, and God is saying to you: “I will teach you what to say. I will show you what to do.”

What more could a person ask for? What more could you and I need?

What is God calling you to do today?

Let’s Pray

Heavenly Father, sometimes I focus on what I'm not good at, ignoring what I am. Help me to move forward and live bold, regardless of my fears, my shortcomings, and my weaknesses. Help me to depend on You, and to do what You have called me to do in Your strength.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.