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This weekend, I bought a book named <The 7 habits of highly effective teens>. Since I am going to middle school and definitely interested in being a highly effective teen, I thought that I have to read to be successful. started to read. I was deeply impressed by the book and I would say it certainly helped me. There were two victorys in here, private victory and public victory. Then the last chapter is called renewal. I'll start with the private victory first.
Before I start, I want to represent the PBA(Personal Bank Account). PBA is just like people's saving account. You could check or save money. You could also make deposits into and take withdrawals from your PBA by what you said, acted, or think. For example, when you keeped your personal promise or made your commitment, then it's a deposit. However, when you break promises to myself, then you'll fell dissapointed and thats what the author calls a withdrawal. The possible Symptoms of a Poor PBA, you could have peer pressure easily, wrestle with feelings of depression both inferiority, overly concerned about what others grade on you, acting arrogant to hide your insecurities, or even worse, you could be self destructed by getting drugs or pornography, vandalism, or gangs. On the other hand, the possible symtoms of a Healthy PBA, you should stand up for yourself and resist peer pressure, also not concerned what everyone thinks about you, trust yourself, and goal driven. Also, you'r not jealous when others success. Its the opposite of a possible symptoms of a poor PBA. Actually, you could think that just keeping promise is PBA deposit, but there are several ways to deposit, and also the ways of withdrawals. The PBA deposits except keeping promises to yourselfs, are first, doing small kinds of kindness. Next, to be gentle with yourself, Third, be honest. Moreover, renew youself. Furthermore, Tap into your talents. The withdrawals from the PBA will be the opposite of doing deposits. Now lets go to the seven habits that highely effects teens.
The first habit for teens is to be proactive, I am the force. In this book, the author emphasizes that proactive or reactive, is your choice. Reactive people is like a can of soda, or cola. When we make them mad, or insult them, then they will explode like we shake the can. On the other hand, Proactive people does not react like cola. They are like water. They don't fizz, have no bubbles, nor pressures. They are calm, cool, and in control. There are some languages in proactive people, and reactive people. Firstly, reactive people says I'll try, That's just the way I am, I have to, I can't, etc. However, proactive people says I'll do it, I can do better than that, I choose to, There's gotta be a way, etc. Moreover reactive people are easily offended, blame others, get angry and complain, and change only when they have to. Proactives, never do like that. It's the way opposite. To be proactive, you should push pause, that means to think more, and then decide what to do: self-awareness, conscience, imagination, willpower. People who have self-awarness can stand apart from myself and observe my thoughts and actions. Conscience can listen to my inner voice to know right from wrong. Imagination can envision new possibilities. And Last, willpower makes the power to choose what you want.
The second habit is called 'begin with the end in mind'. And control you destiny, or someone else will. Begin with the end in mind means, that you draw up the bluprint before you build a house, reading a recipe before you bake a cake, create a outline before you write a paper, or sort like that. Also, the author says choosing the path of life is important. For example, college, friends work, druges, friends, relationships with your family, etc. Without the end in mind, it's like a heard of dumb sheeps. Everyone will go where others go, and that could be the wrong way to us. To have a end in mind, you should have a personal mission statement. A personal mission statement is like a personal credo or motto that states what your life is about, so it's a blueprint of yourself. A personal mission statement is like a tree with deep roots that you will need to survive any stroms, like a change in your environment. However, as you strive to begin with the ed in mind and make a personal mission statement, you should watch out for dangerous roadblocks. FIrst, Negative Lables, like nicknames that everyone hates. Next, the "It's all over" syndrome, Lastly, the wrong wall. Also when you go for the goal, There are five keys to set your goal. First, Count the cost. When you set goals but later we find that we don't have the power to do it, then we didn't counted the cost. Next, Put it in pen. When you set goals just saying "I'll do my homework everyday", not writing, then it will not be much effective than writing. A goal not written is only a wish. Moreover, Just do it, as you could. Furthermore, Use momentous moments, and lastly, rope up. Roping up means to borrow strength from others.
The third habit is called 'put first things first', and about will and won't power. In here, the author contrasts the four types of time Quardrants, The procrastinator, the prioritizer, the yes-man, the slacker. The procrastinator is doing things that's important, but urgent. The protizer is the best, which is the example of the thrid habit, that does something important first, but it's not urgent. The Yes-man does something unimportant things, but urgent, so it lacks of dicipline. The slacker is the category of waste and excess. This lacks responsibility, feel guilt, and results flakiness. To be a prioritizer, you should pick up a planner and plan weekly. To weekly plan your life, there are three steps to do it. First, Identify your big rocks, that are most important. Then, block out time for our big rocks. After these two steps, you have to schedule everything else. Now, we'll see the public victory.
In the public victory, there is one more bank account like PBA. However, this account is called the RBA(Relationship Bank Account). Actually there is RBA deposits and RBA withdrawals that are almost same as PBA. RBA deposits are keeping promises, Do small acts of kindness, be loyal, listen, say you're sorry, and set clear expectations. On the other hand, withdrawals is the opposite as usuall. In here, loyal people keep secrets, avoid gossip, stick up for others.
Now we'll see the fourth habit, think win-win. A life is a All-you-can-eat buffet. In this chapter, the author represents four kinds of ideas. The Win-Win, Win-Lose, Lose-Win, Lose-Lose. Win Lose is called the Totem pole, like the fighting each other, and someone wins and other loses. The Lose-Win is you lose, the others win. Lose-Lose is the worst. Lose-Lose eventually makes people hates each other, resulting the downward spiral of Lose-Lose. Now we'll know about the Win-WIn theory. Win-Win, in here, it says that the all-you-can-eat buffet. In short, Win-Win is a belief that everyone can win. It's both nice, also tough. So when you think Win-Win, then your done with the fourth habit. But how could we think Win-Win? There are two ways: win the private victory first, and to avoid the tumor twins.
The fifth habit is called seek first to understand, then to be understood. And it says that 'You have two ears and one mouth...Hel-Lo!'. In this chapter, we'll se five poor listening styles. Spacing out, Pretend to listen, selective listening, word listening, and self-centered listening. Spacing out is like your mind is went to other galaxy and just pretend listening. Pretend listening is just saying yeah, uh-huh, cool, etc, but not listening to others. Selective listening is just listening what he or she want. Like for example, when others says about his or her friend, and talks about games, then the poor listener will listen only that part. Word listening occurs when we actually pay attention to what someone is saying, but we only listen to the words, not what they actually mean. Self-centered listening happens when we see everything from our own point of view.
Next habit is called synergize, the "high" way. When alone, we can do so little, but together, we can do so much. How to synergy, is to have an five actions. First, define the problem or opportunity, and seek first to understand the idea of others, and understand by sharing your ideas. then brainstorm. At last, you could find the best way, called the high way. Great teams and synergy have some relationship. For example, in teamwork there are plodders, followers, innovators, harmonizers, and show-offs. Plodders are steady, and stick to a job until it's done. Followers are very supportive. Innovators are very creative. Harmonizers provide unity and support and are great synergizers. Lastly, Show-offs are tough at times, and the add the work.
Now it's the part that calls the renewal. Now we'll se the last habit. The seventh habit, also the last habit is called - sharpen the saw. It's just easy, just repair yourself, renew. You should regularly renew your body, you heart, your mind, and your soul.
I think this book helped me a lot. I be that when this book didn't helped us, then you're perfect, or you didn't read it carefully. I should make a PBA and RBA, and I'll always deposit for me and my companionship. Also, I'll make my personal mission statement, which is to help others, be kind and to have a great self-esteem. The first time I read this book, actually I thought this thing was not that great. But after I read it, I thought this book really helped me a lot with PBA, RBA, the seven habits, and the personal mission statement.
첫댓글 Er...... I think this is to much... :D
Rather than quoting from the book, I would like for you to give me examples of the 7 habits in your life. Remember...the 7 habits is a guideline...you must explain to me your results from using these habits.