PART 4 // chapter 3-3

[모나리자]

그러자 라주미힌이 자신의 프로젝트를 펼치기 시작했고, 그는 거의 모든 출판사와 서점이 자신이 무엇을 판매하는지 전혀 모른다고 자세히 설명했습니다. 그래서 그들은 보통 나쁜 출판사이고, 괜찮은 출판사는 원칙적으로 돈을 내고 이익을 냅니다. 때로는 상당한 이익도 냅니다. 라주미힌은 실제로 출판사로 일하기를 꿈꿨습니다. 그는 지난 2년 동안 출판사 사무실에서 일했고, 유럽어 3개 언어를 잘 알고 있었지만, 6일 전에 라스콜니코프에게 독일어로 "schwach"라고 말하면서 번역물의 절반과 번역료의 절반을 받도록 설득하려고 했습니다. 그는 그때 거짓말을 했고, 라스콜니코프는 자신이 거짓말을 하고 있다는 것을 알고 있었습니다.

"왜, 왜 우리는 성공의 주요 수단 중 하나인 우리 자신의 돈이 있는데 기회를 놓치는 거지!" 라주미힌이 따뜻하게 외쳤습니다. "물론 일이 많겠지만, 우리는 일할 거야, 너, 아브도티아 로마노브나, 나, 로디온... 요즘은 책 몇 권으로 엄청난 이익을 얻을 수 있어! 그리고 사업의 가장 큰

요점은 우리가 번역이 필요한 것이 무엇인지 정확히 알고, 번역하고, 출판하고, 한꺼번에 배울 수 있다는 거야. 나는 경험이 있기 때문에 도움이 될 수 있어. 거의 2년 동안 출판사들 사이를 왔다 갔다 했고, 지금은 그들의 사업에 대한 모든 세부 사항을 알고 있어.

도자기를 만드는 데 성인이 될 필요는 없어, 믿어! 그리고 왜, 왜 우리는 기회를 놓치는 거지! 왜, 나는 알고 있어—그리고 나는 비밀을 지켰어—번역하고 출판하는 것만 생각해도 백 루블을 받을 수 있는 책이 두세 권 있다는 걸. 사실, 나는 그 중 하나에 대한 생각만 해도 오백 루블을 받지 않을 거야. 그리고 너는 어떻게 생각해? 내가 출판사에게 말하면, 그는 주저할 거야—그들은 정말 멍청이야! 그리고 사업적인 면에서, 인쇄, 종이, 판매에 관해서는, 당신은 내가 잘 알고 있다고 믿습니다. 우리는 작게 시작해서 크게 할 것입니다.

어쨌든 그것은 우리에게 생계를 가져다주고 자본을 되찾을 것입니다." 두냐의 눈이 빛났다. "당신의 말이 마음에 들어요, 드미트리 프로코피치!" 그녀가 말했다. "물론 저는 그것에 대해 아무것도 모릅니다." 풀케리아 알렉산드로브나가 끼어들었다. "좋은 생각일 수도 있지만, 다시 말하지만 신만이 압니다. 새롭고 시도되지 않은 것입니다. 물론, 우리는 적어도 한동안 여기 머물러야 합니다." 그녀는 로디아를 바라보았다. "형님은 어떻게 생각하세요?" 두냐가 말했다.

"저는 그가 아주 좋은 생각을 가지고 있다고 생각합니다." 그가 대답했다. "물론 출판사를 꿈꾸기에는 너무 이르지만, 우리는 확실히 5~6권의 책을 출판하고 성공할 수 있을 것입니다. 저는 잘 될 책이 한 권 있다는 것을 알고 있습니다. 그리고 그가 그것을 관리할 수 있다는 것에 대해서도 의심의 여지가 없습니다. 그는 사업을 알고 있어요... 하지만 나중에 이야기할 수 있어요..." "만세!" 라주미힌이 소리쳤다. "자, 여기 있어. 이 집에 같은 주인이 사는 아파트가 있어. 특별한 아파트야. 이 숙박 시설과는 통신이 안 돼. 가구는 비치되어 있고, 임대료는 적당하고, 방은 세 개야.

우선 네가 그 아파트를 가져가면 돼. 내일 네 시계를 맡기고 돈을 가져다줄게. 그러면 모든 게 다 해결될 거야. 너희 셋이 같이 살 수 있고, 로디아도 같이 있을 거야. 하지만 로디아, 어디로 가는 거야?" "뭐야, 로디아, 벌써 가는 거야?" 풀케리아 알렉산드로브나가 당황해서 물었다. "이런 시간에?" 라주미힌이 소리쳤다. 두냐는 믿을 수 없다는 듯이 동생을 바라보았다.

그는 모자를 손에 쥐고 그들을 떠날 준비를 하고 있었다. "날 묻어버리거나 영원히 작별인사를 하는 줄 알 거야." 그는 다소 이상하게 말했다. 그는 미소를 지으려고 했지만, 미소가 지어지지 않았다. "하지만 누가 알겠어, 어쩌면 우리가 마지막으로 볼 수도 있을 거야..." 그는 실수로 말을 흘렸다. 그가 생각한 것이었고, 어떻게 된 일인지 큰 소리로 말했다.

"너 왜 그래?" 그의 어머니가 소리쳤다. "어디 가, 로디아?" 두니아가 다소 이상하게 물었다. "아, 난 의무가 있어..." 그는 무슨 말을 할지 망설이는 듯 막연하게 대답했다. 하지만 그의 흰 얼굴에는 날카로운 결의가 엿보였다. "내가 여기 오는 동안 말하고 싶었던 건... 어머니, 그리고 두니아, 우리가 잠시 헤어지는 게 낫다는 거야. 몸이 아프고, 평화롭지 않아.... 나중에 올게, 스스로 올게... 가능할 때 말이야.

널 기억하고 사랑해.... 날 내버려둬, 날 내버려둬. 난 이미 이걸 결정했어... 난 이걸로 완전히 결심했어. 무슨 일이 일어나든, 망가지든, 혼자 있고 싶어. 날 완전히 잊어버려, 그게 나아. 나에 대해 묻지 마. 내가 할 수 있을 때, 나는 스스로 올 거야 아니면... 널 불러올게. 아마 다 돌아올 거야, 하지만 지금 네가 나를 사랑한다면, 나를 포기해... 그렇지 않으면 널 미워하기 시작할 거야, 나는 그것을 느껴... 안녕!"

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5753p

Then Razumihin began to unfold his project, and he explained at length that almost all our publishers and booksellers know nothing at all of what they are selling, and for that reason they are usually bad publishers, and that any decent publications pay as a rule and give a profit, sometimes a considerable one. Razumihin had, indeed, been dreaming of setting up as a publisher. For the last two years he had been working in publishers’ offices, and knew three European languages well, though he had told Raskolnikov six days before that he was “schwach” in German with an object of persuading him to take half his translation and half the payment for it. He had told a lie then, and Raskolnikov knew he was lying.

“Why, why should we let our chance slip when we have one of the chief means of success—money of our own!” cried Razumihin warmly. “Of course there will be a lot of work, but we will work, you, Avdotya Romanovna, I, Rodion.... You get a splendid profit on some books nowadays! And the great

point of the business is that we shall know just what wants translating, and we shall be translating, publishing, learning all at once. I can be of use because I have experience. For nearly two years I’ve been scuttling about among the publishers, and now I know every detail of their business.

You need not be a saint to make pots, believe me! And why, why should we let our chance slip! Why, I know—and I kept the secret—two or three books which one might get a hundred roubles simply for thinking of translating and publishing. Indeed, and I would not take five hundred for the very idea of one of them. And what do you think? If I were to tell a publisher, I dare say he’d hesitate—they are such blockheads! And as for the business side, printing, paper, selling, you trust to me, I know my way about. We’ll begin in a small way and go on to a large.

In any case it will get us our living and we shall get back our capital.” Dounia’s eyes shone. “I like what you are saying, Dmitri Prokofitch!” she said. “I know nothing about it, of course,” put in Pulcheria Alexandrovna, “it may be a good idea, but again God knows. It’s new and untried. Of course, we must remain here at least for a time.” She looked at Rodya. “What do you think, brother?” said Dounia.

“I think he’s got a very good idea,” he answered. “Of course, it’s too soon to dream of a publishing firm, but we certainly might bring out five or six books and be sure of success. I know of one book myself which would be sure to go well. And as for his being able to manage it, there’s no doubt about that either. He knows the business.... But we can talk it over later....” “Hurrah!” cried Razumihin. “Now, stay, there’s a flat here in this house, belonging to the same owner. It’s a special flat apart, not communicating with these lodgings. It’s furnished, rent moderate, three rooms.

Suppose you take them to begin with. I’ll pawn your watch to-morrow and bring you the money, and everything can be arranged then. You can all three live together, and Rodya will be with you. But where are you off to, Rodya?” “What, Rodya, you are going already?” Pulcheria Alexandrovna asked in dismay. “At such a minute?” cried Razumihin. Dounia looked at her brother with incredulous wonder.

He held his cap in his hand, he was preparing to leave them. “One would think you were burying me or saying good-bye for ever,” he said somewhat oddly. He attempted to smile, but it did not turn out a smile. “But who knows, perhaps it is the last time we shall see each other...” he let slip accidentally. It was what he was thinking, and it somehow was uttered aloud.

“What is the matter with you?” cried his mother. “Where are you going, Rodya?” asked Dounia rather strangely. “Oh, I’m quite obliged to...” he answered vaguely, as though hesitating what he would say. But there was a look of sharp determination in his white face. “I meant to say... as I was coming here... I meant to tell you, mother, and you, Dounia, that it would be better for us to part for a time. I feel ill, I am not at peace.... I will come afterwards, I will come of myself... when it’s possible.

I remember you and love you.... Leave me, leave me alone. I decided this even before... I’m absolutely resolved on it. Whatever may come to me, whether I come to ruin or not, I want to be alone. Forget me altogether, it’s better. Don’t inquire about me. When I can, I’ll come of myself or... I’ll send for you. Perhaps it will all come back, but now if you love me, give me up... else I shall begin to hate you, I feel it.... Good-bye!”