PART 4 // chapter 5-6

[모나리자]

그리고 왜 당신은 경찰서, 중위에게 짐꾼들을 데려갔습니까?' 내가 당신을 의심한다면 그렇게 행동했어야 했습니다. 나는 당신의 증거를 적절한 형태로 수집하고, 당신의 숙소를 수색하고, 어쩌면 당신을 체포했어야 했습니다... 그래서 나는 당신을 의심하지 않습니다. 내가 그렇게 하지 않았으니까요! 하지만 당신은 그것을 정상적으로 볼 수 없고 아무것도 보지 못할 겁니다, 다시 한 번 말씀드립니다."

라스콜니코프는 포르피리 페트로비치가 알아차리지 못할 수 없도록 말을 시작했습니다. "당신은 계속 거짓말을 하고 있습니다." 그는 소리쳤습니다. "당신의 목적은 모르겠지만, 당신은 거짓말을 하고 있습니다. 당신은 방금 그렇게 말하지 않았고 내가 틀릴 리가 없습니다!" "내가 거짓말을 하고 있습니까?" 포르피리는 격노한 듯 반복했지만, 라스콜니코프가 자신에 대해 하는 의견에 전혀 신경 쓰지 않는 듯, 쾌활하고 아이러니한 표정을 유지했습니다.

"거짓말을 하고 있습니다... 하지만 방금 당신을 어떻게 대했습니까, 저는, 검사 변호사? 당신을 재촉하고 당신의 변호를 위한 모든 수단을 제공했습니다. 질병, 섬망, 부상, 우울증, 경찰관, 그리고 그 밖의 모든 것들? 아! 하하하! 사실, 그 모든 심리적 변호 수단은 그다지 신뢰할 수 없고 양면적입니다. 질병, 섬망, 기억이 나지 않습니다. 괜찮습니다. 하지만 왜, 선생님, 당신의 질병과 섬망에서 당신은 다른 어떤 것도 아닌 그 망상에만 사로잡혔습니까?

다른 것들이 있었을 수도 있겠지요, 응? 하하하!" 라스콜니코프는 거만하고 경멸하는 듯이 그를 바라보았습니다. "잠깐만요." 그는 큰 소리로 위압적으로 말하며 일어나서 포르피리를 약간 뒤로 밀어냈습니다. "잠깐만요, 알고 싶은 게 있습니다. 당신이 나를 의심에서 완전히 자유롭다고 인정하는지 아닌지? 말해, 포르피리 페트로비치, 한 번만 말해, 서둘러!”

“내가 너한테 무슨 볼일이 있어!” 포르피리가 완벽하게 쾌활하고 교활하고 침착한 얼굴로 소리쳤다. “그리고 왜 알고 싶어? 왜 그렇게 많이 알고 싶어? 아직 걱정거리가 되지 않았는데? 어머, 마치 성냥을 달라고 하는 아이 같잖아! 그리고 왜 그렇게 불안해? 왜 우리에게 강요하는 거야, 응? 하하하!” “반복한다.” 라스콜니코프가 격노하며 소리쳤다. “내가 참을 수 없다는 거야!” “무슨 일로? 불확실성 때문에?” 포르피리가 말을 가로채며 말했다. “나를 놀리지 마! 나는 그것을 가질 수 없어! 나는 그것을 가질 수 없다고 말해.

"나는 할 수 없고 하지 않을 거야, 들리니, 들리니?" 그는 소리치며 주먹을 다시 테이블에 내리쳤다. "조용히! 조용히! 엿들을 거야! 진지하게 경고하는데, 몸조리해. 농담이 아니야." 포르피리가 속삭였지만, 이번에는 얼굴에 늙은 여자다운 선량함과 불안이 없었다. 이제 그는 독단적이고, 엄격하고, 눈살을 찌푸리고, 이번에는 모든 신비감을 버렸다. 하지만 이는 잠깐뿐이었다. 라스콜니코프는 당황하여 갑자기 실제로 격노했지만, 이상하게도 그는 다시 조용히 말하라는 명령을 따랐다. 그는 완벽한 격노 상태였다.

"고문을 당하는 것을 허용하지 않을 거야." 그는 속삭였고, 즉시 증오심으로 명령에 따르지 않을 수 없었고 그 생각에 더 큰 격노로 몰렸다는 것을 깨달았다. "나를 체포하고, 수색하고, 하지만 친절하게 예의 바르게 행동하고, 나를 가지고 놀지 마!" 감히 하지 마!" "형식은 걱정하지 마." 포르피리가 라스콜니코프를 보고 즐거워하는 듯 똑같은 교활한 미소로 말을 가로채며 말했다. "나는 당신을 아주 친절하게 초대했어."

"나는 당신의 우정을 원하지 않고 침을 뱉을 거야! 알아? 그리고, 여기, 나는 모자를 벗고 간다. 나를 체포하려고 한다면 지금 뭐라고 할 거야?" 그는 모자를 쓰고 문으로 갔다. "그리고 내 작은 놀라움을 보지 않겠어?" 포르피리가 빙긋 웃으며 다시 그의 팔을 잡고 문 앞에서 멈추었다. 그는 점점 더 장난기 있고 유쾌해졌고, 라스콜니코프는 화가 났다. "무슨 놀라움이야?" 그는 물으며 움직이지 않고 포르피리를 놀라서 바라보았다. "내 작은 놀라움, 문 뒤에 앉아 있어, 하하하!" (그는 잠긴 문을 가리켰다.) "나는 그가 탈출하지 못하도록 그를 가두었다."

"뭐야? 어디야? 뭐라고?..." 라스콜니코프는 문으로 걸어가 문을 열려고 했지만 문이 잠겨 있었습니다. "잠겨 있어요. 여기 열쇠가 있어요!" 그리고 그는 주머니에서 열쇠를 꺼냈습니다. "당신은 거짓말을 하고 있어요." 라스콜니코프가 제지 없이 소리쳤습니다. "당신은 거짓말을 하고 있어요, 빌어먹을 펀치넬로!" 그리고 그는 전혀 놀라지 않고 다른 문으로 물러선 포르피리에게 달려들었습니다. "나는 그것을 다 알고 있어요! 당신은 내가 당신에게 자신을 배신하도록 거짓말을 하고 조롱하고 있어요..." "아니, 당신은 더 이상 자신을 배신할 수 없어요, 나의 사랑하는 로디온 로마노비치.

당신은 격정에 빠져 있어요. 소리치지 마세요, 나는 서기들을 부를 거예요." "당신은 거짓말을 하고 있어요! 서기들을 불러요! 당신은 내가 아프다는 것을 알고 있었고 나를 흥분시켜 자신을 배신하게 하려고 했어요, 그것이 당신의 목표였어요! 사실을 제시하세요! 나는 그것을 다 알고 있어요. 당신은 증거가 없고, 자메토프와 같은 비참하고 쓰레기 같은 의심만 가지고 있어요! 당신은 내 성격을 알고 있었고, 나를 격노하게 만들고 사제와 대리인들과 함께 나를 쓰러뜨리고 싶었어요... 그들을 기다리고 있나요? 응! 뭘 기다리고 있나요? 그들은 어디에 있나요? 그들을 내보낼까요?”

“왜 대리인들이죠, 좋은 사람아? 사람들이 상상할 것들! 그리고 그렇게 하는 것은 당신이 말했듯이 형식적으로 행동하는 것이 아니에요. 당신은 일을 모르잖아요, 친애하는 친구야... 그리고 당신이 보듯이 형식에서 벗어날 수 없어요.” 포르피리는 중얼거리며 소리가 들리는 문에서 귀를 기울였다. “아, 그들이 온다.” 라스콜니코프가 소리쳤다. “당신은 그들을 불렀어요! 당신은 그들을 기대했어요! 글쎄요, 그들을 모두 내보낼 수 있어요: 당신의 대리인, 당신의 증인, 당신이 좋아하는 것!... 나는 준비되었습니다!” 하지만 이 순간 이상한 사건이 일어났고, 라스콜니코프나 포르피리 페트로비치는 그들의 면담에 대한 그런 결론을 기대할 수 없었을 만큼 예상치 못한 일이었습니다.

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6427p

And why did you invite the porters to go with you to the police station, to the lieutenant?’ That’s how I ought to have acted if I had a grain of suspicion of you. I ought to have taken your evidence in due form, searched your lodging and perhaps have arrested you, too... so I have no suspicion of you, since I have not done that! But you can’t look at it normally and you see nothing, I say again.”

Raskolnikov started so that Porfiry Petrovitch could not fail to perceive it. “You are lying all the while,” he cried, “I don’t know your object, but you are lying. You did not speak like that just now and I cannot be mistaken!” “I am lying?” Porfiry repeated, apparently incensed, but preserving a good-humoured and ironical face, as though he were not in the least concerned at Raskolnikov’s opinion of him.

“I am lying... but how did I treat you just now, I, the examining lawyer? Prompting you and giving you every means for your defence; illness, I said, delirium, injury, melancholy and the police officers and all the rest of it? Ah! He-he-he! Though, indeed, all those psychological means of defence are not very reliable and cut both ways: illness, delirium, I don’t remember—that’s all right, but why, my good sir, in your illness and in your delirium were you haunted by just those delusions and not by any others?

There may have been others, eh? He-he-he!” Raskolnikov looked haughtily and contemptuously at him. “Briefly,” he said loudly and imperiously, rising to his feet and in so doing pushing Porfiry back a little, “briefly, I want to know, do you acknowledge me perfectly free from suspicion or not? Tell me, Porfiry Petrovitch, tell me once for all and make haste!”

“What a business I’m having with you!” cried Porfiry with a perfectly good-humoured, sly and composed face. “And why do you want to know, why do you want to know so much, since they haven’t begun to worry you? Why, you are like a child asking for matches! And why are you so uneasy? Why do you force yourself upon us, eh? He-he-he!” “I repeat,” Raskolnikov cried furiously, “that I can’t put up with it!” “With what? Uncertainty?” interrupted Porfiry. “Don’t jeer at me! I won’t have it! I tell you I won’t have it.

I can’t and I won’t, do you hear, do you hear?” he shouted, bringing his fist down on the table again. “Hush! Hush! They’ll overhear! I warn you seriously, take care of yourself. I am not joking,” Porfiry whispered, but this time there was not the look of old womanish good nature and alarm in his face. Now he was peremptory, stern, frowning and for once laying aside all mystification. But this was only for an instant. Raskolnikov, bewildered, suddenly fell into actual frenzy, but, strange to say, he again obeyed the command to speak quietly, though he was in a perfect paroxysm of fury.

“I will not allow myself to be tortured,” he whispered, instantly recognising with hatred that he could not help obeying the command and driven to even greater fury by the thought. “Arrest me, search me, but kindly act in due form and don’t play with me! Don’t dare!” “Don’t worry about the form,” Porfiry interrupted with the same sly smile, as it were, gloating with enjoyment over Raskolnikov. “I invited you to see me quite in a friendly way.”

“I don’t want your friendship and I spit on it! Do you hear? And, here, I take my cap and go. What will you say now if you mean to arrest me?” He took up his cap and went to the door. “And won’t you see my little surprise?” chuckled Porfiry, again taking him by the arm and stopping him at the door. He seemed to become more playful and good-humoured which maddened Raskolnikov. “What surprise?” he asked, standing still and looking at Porfiry in alarm. “My little surprise, it’s sitting there behind the door, he-he-he!” (He pointed to the locked door.) “I locked him in that he should not escape.”

“What is it? Where? What?...” Raskolnikov walked to the door and would have opened it, but it was locked. “It’s locked, here is the key!” And he brought a key out of his pocket. “You are lying,” roared Raskolnikov without restraint, “you lie, you damned punchinello!” and he rushed at Porfiry who retreated to the other door, not at all alarmed. “I understand it all! You are lying and mocking so that I may betray myself to you...” “Why, you could not betray yourself any further, my dear Rodion Romanovitch.

You are in a passion. Don’t shout, I shall call the clerks.” “You are lying! Call the clerks! You knew I was ill and tried to work me into a frenzy to make me betray myself, that was your object! Produce your facts! I understand it all. You’ve no evidence, you have only wretched rubbishly suspicions like Zametov’s! You knew my character, you wanted to drive me to fury and then to knock me down with priests and deputies.... Are you waiting for them? eh! What are you waiting for? Where are they? Produce them?”

“Why deputies, my good man? What things people will imagine! And to do so would not be acting in form as you say, you don’t know the business, my dear fellow.... And there’s no escaping form, as you see,” Porfiry muttered, listening at the door through which a noise could be heard. “Ah, they’re coming,” cried Raskolnikov. “You’ve sent for them! You expected them! Well, produce them all: your deputies, your witnesses, what you like!... I am ready!” But at this moment a strange incident occurred, something so unexpected that neither Raskolnikov nor Porfiry Petrovitch could have looked for such a conclusion to their interview.