PART 5 // chapter 2-3

[모나리자]

콜랴, 발을 움직이지 마. 신사답게 앉아. 뭐라고, 소냐?" 소냐는 표트르 페트로비치의 사과를 서둘러 전하며, 모든 사람이 들을 수 있을 만큼 큰 소리로 말하려고 애썼고, 표트르 페트로비치에게 가장 공손한 표현을 신중하게 골랐다. 그녀는 표트르 페트로비치가 가능한 한 빨리 와서 그녀와만 사업에 대해 논의하고 그녀를 위해 무엇을 할 수 있을지 고려하겠다고 특별히 말했다고 덧붙였다. 소냐는 이것이 카테리나 이바노브나를 위로하고, 아첨하고, 그녀의 자존심을 만족시킬 것이라는 것을 알고 있었다. 그녀는 라스콜니코프 옆에 앉았다. 그녀는 그에게 서둘러 인사하고, 호기심 어린 눈으로 그를 쳐다보았다. 하지만 나머지 시간 동안 그녀는 그를 보거나 말을 걸지 않는 듯했다.

그녀는 멍하니 있는 듯했지만, 카테리나 이바노브나를 계속 바라보며 그녀를 기쁘게 하려고 노력했다. 그녀나 카테리나 이바노브나 모두 애도를 표할 수 없었다. 소냐는 짙은 갈색을 입었고, 카테리나 이바노브나는 그녀의 유일한 드레스, 짙은 줄무늬 코튼 드레스를 입고 있었습니다. 표트르 페트로비치의 메시지는 매우 성공적이었습니다. 카테리나 이바노브나는 소냐의 말을 품위 있게 경청한 채, 표트르 페트로비치가 어떤지 똑같이 품위 있게 물었고, 즉시 라스콜니코프에게 거의 큰 소리로 속삭였습니다. 표트르 페트로비치의 지위와 지위를 가진 사람이 그녀의 가족에 대한 헌신과 그녀의 아버지와의 오랜 우정에도 불구하고 그런 "특별한 동행"을 하는 것은 분명 이상했을 것이라고.

"그래서 저는 당신에게 너무 감사합니다, 로디온 로마노비치, 그런 환경에서도 제 환대를 멸시하지 않으셨기 때문입니다." 그녀는 거의 큰 소리로 덧붙였습니다. "하지만 제 가난한 남편에 대한 당신의 특별한 애정 덕분에 약속을 지킬 수 있었을 거라고 확신합니다." 그녀는 다시 한 번 자부심과 위엄을 가지고 방문객들을 살펴보고, 갑자기 귀머거리 남자의 테이블 너머로 큰 소리로 물었다. "고기를 더 먹지 않았을까? 와인을 좀 주었을까?" 노인은 대답하지 않았고, 이웃들이 그를 찔러대고 흔들며 즐겁게 지냈지만, 오랫동안 무슨 말을 하는지 알아들을 수 없었다. 그는 입을 벌린 채 주변을 둘러보았고, 그것은 단지 일반적인 웃음을 더할 뿐이었다.

"얼마나 멍청한 놈인가! 봐, 봐! 왜 데려왔지? 하지만 표트르 페트로비치에 관해서는, 나는 항상 그를 신뢰했어." 카테리나 이바노브나가 말을 이었다. "그리고 물론, 그는..." 그녀는 매우 엄격한 얼굴로 아말리아 이바노브나에게 너무 날카롭고 큰 소리로 말했고, 후자는 매우 당황했다. "당신의 차려입은 드래글테일과는 달라요. 제 아버지가 요리사로 부엌에 데려오지 않았을 테고, 제 고인이 된 남편이 마음씨 좋게 초대했다면 그들을 존중했을 겁니다."

"그렇습니다. 그는 술을 좋아했습니다. 그는 술을 좋아했습니다!" 위원회 서기가 보드카 열두 번째 잔을 꿀꺽 삼키며 소리쳤다. "저의 고인이 된 남편은 확실히 그런 약점이 있었고, 누구나 다 알고 있습니다." 카테리나 이바노브나는 즉시 그를 공격했다. "하지만 그는 친절하고 명예로운 사람이었고, 가족을 사랑하고 존중했습니다.

가장 나쁜 것은 그의 선량함 때문에 온갖 불명예스러운 사람들을 신뢰했고, 신발 한 켤레 값도 안 하는 사람들과 술을 마셨다는 것입니다. 믿으시겠습니까,

로디온 로마노비치, 주머니에서 진저브레드 수탉을 발견했습니다. 그는 취해 있었지만 아이들을 잊지 않았습니다!" "수탉? 수탉이라고 했습니까?" 위원회 서기가 소리쳤다. 카테리나 이바노브나는 대답을 하지 않았다. 그녀는 생각에 잠긴 채 한숨을 쉬었다. "당신도 다른 사람들과 마찬가지로 내가 그에게 너무 가혹하다고 생각할 것입니다." 그녀는 라스콜니코프에게 말을 걸며 계속했다.

"하지만 그게 아니잖아! 그는 나를 존중했어, 정말 존중했어! 그는 친절한 사람이었어! 그리고 나는 때때로 그를 얼마나 불쌍히 여겼어! 그는 구석에 앉아 나를 바라보곤 했고, 나는 그를 몹시 불쌍히 여겼고, 그에게 친절하게 대하고 싶었지만, 그러다가 스스로에게 '그에게 친절하게 대하면 그는 다시 술을 마실 거야'라고 생각하곤 했어. 엄격하게 해야만 그를 제한 범위 안에 둘 수 있었어." "그래, 그는 종종 머리를 잡아당겼지." 위원회 서기가 다시 큰 소리로 말하며 보드카 한 잔을 더 마셨다. "어떤 바보들은 머리를 잡아당기는 것 외에도 매를 맞는 게 더 나을 거야.

"이제 죽은 남편에 대해 말하는 게 아니야!" 카테리나 이바노브나가 그에게 쏘아붙였다. 그녀의 뺨에 홍조가 점점 더 뚜렷해졌고, 가슴이 들썩였다. 1분만 더 있으면 그녀는 소란을 피울 준비가 되었을 것이다. 많은 방문객들이 킬킬거리며 기뻐했다. 그들은 위원회 직원을 찌르고 그에게 무언가를 속삭이기 시작했다. 그들은 분명히 그를 부추기려고 했다. "무슨 말을 암시하시는지 물어보겠습니다." 직원이 말을 시작했다. "즉, 누구의... 누구에 대해... 방금 말씀하신 건가요... 하지만 상관없어요! 말도 안 돼요! 과부! 용서합니다.... 패스!"

그리고 그는 보드카를 한 모금 더 마셨다. 라스콜니코프는 침묵 속에 앉아 역겨움을 느끼며 귀를 기울였다. 그는 단지 예의 바르게 먹기 위해, 카테리나 이바노브나가 계속 접시에 담아주는 음식을 맛보기 위해 먹었다. 그녀의 감정을 상하게 하지 않기 위해서였다.

그는 소니아를 주의 깊게 지켜보았다. 하지만 소니아는 점점 더 불안해지고 괴로워했다. 그녀 역시 저녁 식사가 평화롭게 끝나지 않을 것이라고 예견했고, 카테리나 이바노브나가 점점 더 짜증을 내는 것을 공포에 질려 지켜보았다. 그녀는 소냐가 카테리나 이바노브나의 초대에 대한 '상류층' 숙녀들의 경멸적인 대우의 주된 이유라는 것을 알고 있었다.

그녀는 아말리아 이바노브나로부터 어머니가 초대에 대해 매우 불쾌해하며 "어떻게 딸을 그 젊은이 옆에 앉힐 수 있었을까?"라고 물었다는 이야기를 들었다. 소냐는 카테리나 이바노브나가 이미 이 이야기를 들었고, 소냐에 대한 모욕은 카테리나 이바노브나에게 자신, 자녀, 아버지에 대한 모욕보다 더 큰 의미가 있다는 것을 느꼈다. 소냐는 카테리나 이바노브나가 "그 드레글테일들에게 둘 다..."라는 것을 보여주기 전까지는 만족하지 않을 것이라는 것을 알고 있었다.

상황을 더 악화시키는 것은 누군가가 테이블 반대편에서 소냐에게 검은 빵으로 만든 화살로 꿰뚫린 두 개의 하트가 있는 접시를 건네주었다. 카테리나 이바노브나는 얼굴이 붉어지고 테이블 너머로 큰 소리로 말했다. 그 남자는 "술 취한 놈!"

아말리아 이바노브나는 뭔가 잘못될 것을 예견했고, 동시에 카테리나 이바노브나의 오만함에 깊은 상처를 입었고, 회사의 기분을 좋게 만들고 그들의 존경을 받기 위해 그녀는 아무 의미 없이 그녀의 지인인 "약국에서 온 칼"에 대한 이야기를 시작했다. 그는 어느 날 밤 택시를 운전하고 있었고, "마부가 그를 죽이기를 원했고, 칼은 그에게 죽이지 말라고 간청했고, 울고 악수를 하고, 무서워서 그의 심장을 찔렀다.

" 카테리나 이바노브나는 미소를 지었지만, 아말리아 이바노브나는 러시아어로 일화를 말해서는 안 된다고 즉시 지적했다. 후자는 훨씬 더 화가 나서 그녀는 "베를린의 바터는 매우 중요한 사람이었고, 항상 주머니에 손을 넣고 다녔다"고 반박했다. 카테리나 이바노브나는 참을 수 없어 너무 웃었고, 아말리아 이바노브나는 인내심을 잃고 자신을 제대로 통제할 수 없었다.

그러자 분노에 사로잡힌 아말리아 이바노브나는 주먹으로 테이블을 내리치고, 자신이 아말리아 이바노브나이고 루드비고브나가 아니라고 소리쳤다. "그녀의

바터는 요한이라는 이름이고 그는 시장이고, 카테리나 이바노브나의 바터는 결코 시장이 아니었다." 카테리나 이바노브나는 의자에서 일어나서 단호하고 겉보기에 차분한 목소리로(그녀는 창백했고 가슴은 헐떡거렸지만) "만약 그녀가 감히 그녀의 멸시받는 아버지를 그녀의 아빠와 같은 수준으로 만들려고 한다면,

그녀, 카테리나 이바노브나는 그녀의 모자를 머리에서 찢어 발로 짓밟을 것이다." 아말리아 이바노브나는 방을 돌아다니며, 그녀가 집의 여주인이고 카테리나 이바노브나는 지금 당장 숙소를 떠나야 한다고 큰 소리로 외쳤다. 그러고는 어떤 이유에서인지 그녀는 서둘러 테이블에서 은숟가락을 가져왔다.

큰 함성과 소란이 일어났고, 아이들은 울기 시작했습니다. 소냐는 카테리나 이바노브나를 붙잡기 위해 달려갔지만, 아말리아 이바노브나가 "노란색 티켓"에 대해 뭔가 소리를 지르자 카테리나 이바노브나는 소냐를 밀어내고 집주인에게 달려가 위협을 실행했습니다. 그 순간 문이 열리고 표트르 페트로비치 루진이 문지방에 나타났습니다. 그는 엄중하고 경계하는 눈으로 파티를 살폈습니다. 카테리나 이바노브나는 그에게 달려갔습니다.

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Kolya, don’t fidget with your feet; sit like a little gentleman. What are you saying, Sonia?” Sonia hastened to give her Pyotr Petrovitch’s apologies, trying to speak loud enough for everyone to hear and carefully choosing the most respectful phrases which she attributed to Pyotr Petrovitch. She added that Pyotr Petrovitch had particularly told her to say that, as soon as he possibly could, he would come immediately to discuss business alone with her and to consider what could be done for her, etc., etc. Sonia knew that this would comfort Katerina Ivanovna, would flatter her and gratify her pride. She sat down beside Raskolnikov; she made him a hurried bow, glancing curiously at him. But for the rest of the time she seemed to avoid looking at him or speaking to him.

She seemed absent-minded, though she kept looking at Katerina Ivanovna, trying to please her. Neither she nor Katerina Ivanovna had been able to get mourning; Sonia was wearing dark brown, and Katerina Ivanovna had on her only dress, a dark striped cotton one. The message from Pyotr Petrovitch was very successful. Listening to Sonia with dignity, Katerina Ivanovna inquired with equal dignity how Pyotr Petrovitch was, then at once whispered almost aloud to Raskolnikov that it certainly would have been strange for a man of Pyotr Petrovitch’s position and standing to find himself in such “extraordinary company,” in spite of his devotion to her family and his old friendship with her father.

“That’s why I am so grateful to you, Rodion Romanovitch, that you have not disdained my hospitality, even in such surroundings,” she added almost

aloud. “But I am sure that it was only your special affection for my poor husband that has made you keep your promise.” Then once more with pride and dignity she scanned her visitors, and suddenly inquired aloud across the table of the deaf man: “Wouldn’t he have some more meat, and had he been given some wine?” The old man made no answer and for a long while could not understand what he was asked, though his neighbours amused themselves by poking and shaking him. He simply gazed about him with his mouth open, which only increased the general mirth.

“What an imbecile! Look, look! Why was he brought? But as to Pyotr Petrovitch, I always had confidence in him,” Katerina Ivanovna continued, “and, of course, he is not like...” with an extremely stern face she addressed Amalia Ivanovna so sharply and loudly that the latter was quite disconcerted, “not like your dressed up draggletails whom my father would not have taken as cooks into his kitchen, and my late husband would have done them honour if he had invited them in the goodness of his heart.”

“Yes, he was fond of drink, he was fond of it, he did drink!” cried the commissariat clerk, gulping down his twelfth glass of vodka. “My late husband certainly had that weakness, and everyone knows it,” Katerina Ivanovna attacked him at once, “but he was a kind and honourable man, who loved and respected his family.

The worst of it was his good nature made him trust all sorts of disreputable people, and he drank with fellows who were not worth the sole of his shoe. Would you believe it,

Rodion Romanovitch, they found a gingerbread cock in his pocket; he was dead drunk, but he did not forget the children!” “A cock? Did you say a cock?” shouted the commissariat clerk. Katerina Ivanovna did not vouchsafe a reply. She sighed, lost in thought. “No doubt you think, like everyone, that I was too severe with him,” she went on, addressing Raskolnikov.

“But that’s not so! He respected me, he respected me very much! He was a kind-hearted man! And how sorry I was for him sometimes! He would sit in a corner and look at me, I used to feel so sorry for him, I used to want to be kind to him and then would think to myself: ‘Be kind to him and he will drink again,’ it was only by severity that you could keep him within bounds.” “Yes, he used to get his hair pulled pretty often,” roared the commissariat clerk again, swallowing another glass of vodka. “Some fools would be the better for a good drubbing, as well as having their hair pulled.

I am not talking of my late husband now!” Katerina Ivanovna snapped at him. The flush on her cheeks grew more and more marked, her chest heaved. In another minute she would have been ready to make a scene. Many of the visitors were sniggering, evidently delighted. They began poking the commissariat clerk and whispering something to him. They were evidently trying to egg him on. “Allow me to ask what are you alluding to,” began the clerk, “that is to say, whose... about whom... did you say just now... But I don’t care! That’s nonsense! Widow! I forgive you.... Pass!”

And he took another drink of vodka. Raskolnikov sat in silence, listening with disgust. He only ate from politeness, just tasting the food that Katerina Ivanovna was continually putting on his plate, to avoid hurting her feelings.

He watched Sonia intently. But Sonia became more and more anxious and distressed; she, too, foresaw that the dinner would not end peaceably, and saw with terror Katerina Ivanovna’s growing irritation. She knew that she, Sonia, was the chief reason for the ‘genteel’ ladies’ contemptuous treatment of Katerina Ivanovna’s invitation.

She had heard from Amalia Ivanovna that the mother was positively offended at the invitation and had asked the question: “How could she let her daughter sit down beside that young person?” Sonia had a feeling that Katerina Ivanovna had already heard this and an insult to Sonia meant more to Katerina Ivanovna than an insult to herself, her children, or her father, Sonia knew that Katerina Ivanovna would not be satisfied now, “till she had shown those draggletails that they were both...”

To make matters worse someone passed Sonia, from the other end of the table, a plate with two hearts pierced with an arrow, cut out of black bread. Katerina Ivanovna flushed crimson and at once said aloud across the table that the man who sent it was “a drunken ass!”

Amalia Ivanovna was foreseeing something amiss, and at the same time deeply wounded by Katerina Ivanovna’s haughtiness, and to restore the good-humour of the company and raise herself in their esteem she began, apropos of nothing, telling a story about an acquaintance of hers “Karl from the chemist’s,” who was driving one night in a cab, and that “the cabman wanted him to kill, and Karl very much begged him not to kill, and wep and clasped hands, and frightened and from fear pierced his heart.

” Though Katerina Ivanovna smiled, she observed at once that Amalia Ivanovna ought not to tell anecdotes in Russian; the latter was still more offended, and she retorted that her “Vater aus Berlin was a very important man, and always went with his hands in pockets.” Katerina Ivanovna could not restrain herself and laughed so much that Amalia Ivanovna lost patience and could scarcely control herself.

At this Amalia Ivanovna, lashed to fury, struck the table with her fist, and shrieked that she was Amalia Ivanovna, and not Ludwigovna, “that her

Vater was named Johann and that he was a burgomeister, and that Katerina Ivanovna’s Vater was quite never a burgomeister.” Katerina Ivanovna rose from her chair, and with a stern and apparently calm voice (though she was pale and her chest was heaving) observed that “if she dared for one moment to set her contemptible wretch of a father on a level with her papa,

she, Katerina Ivanovna, would tear her cap off her head and trample it under foot.” Amalia Ivanovna ran about the room, shouting at the top of her voice, that she was mistress of the house and that Katerina Ivanovna should leave the lodgings that minute; then she rushed for some reason to collect the silver spoons from the table.

There was a great outcry and uproar, the children began crying. Sonia ran to restrain Katerina Ivanovna, but when Amalia Ivanovna shouted something about “the yellow ticket,” Katerina Ivanovna pushed Sonia away, and rushed at the landlady to carry out her threat. At that minute the door opened, and Pyotr Petrovitch Luzhin appeared on the threshold. He stood scanning the party with severe and vigilant eyes. Katerina Ivanovna rushed to him.