Re: Max & Ruby (Logan)

[Teacher Winget]

One day, Ruby was choosing beautiful flowers for her grandmother. Meanwhile, Max was playing with a froggy, which obeys well listened well. So Max and the froggy was soon became best friends. But then, Ruby told Max that they should go back to their home home and decorate the table for their grandmother. Max was so sad after hearing that bad news. Because Ruby refused to bring the froggy home, he put it in his front pocket. But she noticed the frog in his pocket and told him to take it away to the creek. Max still didn't want to part from the froggy, so he hind hid it in his back pocket. However, Ruby soon noticed the frog was in Max's pocket, so Max took it away to his its home. Luckily, his grandmother found the froggy and brought it to his their home. I'm so glad that Max finally could have the frog he really loves.

Score: A-

Tips)

1. 문법: "Max and froggy was soon became" 대신 "Max and the froggy soon became"이라고 해야 해요.
2. 내용 추가: Max가 왜 개구리를 집에 데려가고 싶었는지 더 설명할 수 있어요. "Max는 개구리를 정말 좋아해서 함께 있고 싶었어요!"