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Confusing lust with love
Dear Annie: I am a married woman with one child. We don't lack for anything. My husband is an OK guy and a good father, but he's very self-centered.
Last May, one of my neighbors started to show an interest in me. "Jack" also is married (his wife is a bit of a hypochondriac), and he has a small child. A few months ago, at a party we both attended, Jack had a few drinks and gave me a passionate kiss. I have never been kissed like that in my life. It sent shock waves through my entire body. After that, we would slip away and kiss here and there. Then it started to be more. Now we have a secret affair going on.
I don't want to get caught, but I also don't want to give him up. It is like I finally found my soul mate. Never in my wildest dreams did I think this would happen to me. What should I do? -- Very Confused
Dear Confused: Don't confuse passionate kisses with Jack being your soul mate. This is lust, not love. Are you willing to wreck two marriages and destroy your child's sense of security for shock waves? Illicit affairs can be temporarily exciting, but the consequences are often permanently painful.
Tell your husband you are unhappy and want to see a counselor. If he won't go, go without him. Learn how to put some of that sexual energy into your marriage, so it can be the kind of relationship you crave and appreciate, or make a clean break. Cheating is never the answer.
Dear Annie: I am responding to the letter from "Negative Dad." He said his son's blood type is O, while his is AB and his wife's is A. He assumed he was not his son's biological father.
Classification into the major blood groups is based on the presence or absence of two proteins, the A and B antigens, produced by the A and B alleles. The absence of either A or B antigens is called Type O.
The son gets one gene from each parent. If the parent has one chromosome with an antigen and one without, he or she can pass either one on to the child. The writer, told he is "type AB," assumes he must pass on either the A or the B allele, but cannot have a son with neither. But other factors may block the expression of these alleles, so the blood of the child with A or B or AB genotype may be reported as Type O. These other factors are not reported in ordinary ABO typing. There is also the possibility of laboratory error.
The reader should be encouraged to seek a consultation with a geneticist and not proceed with a potentially destructive confrontation on the basis of the major blood types alone.
Caveat lector, sapeat lector. Let the reader beware, but first let the reader be informed. -- Gordon Harper, M.D., Harvard Medical School
Dear Dr. Harper: Thank you for clearing that up, and for providing a valid reason for Dad to believe his son belongs to him biologically as well as in every other way. (And the Latin was a nice touch.)
2005.03.16
Global warming
Everyone has an opinion on the environment. Recently the Evangelical Church told its members that global warming is dangerous and cannot be ignored.
Here is how the Kyoto Bible would read.
"Before there was heaven and earth there was only darkness, so God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light. Then God decided to create the earth. He commanded the rivers to lie in their banks, and the oceans to roll back from the land. He made plants and trees to grow on the land and bear fruit.
"First God made the fish, and then the birds and all the animals big and small to walk the earth.
"God created one more creature to make the world complete. He took the clay from the earth and molded it in the shape of a man and named it Adam."
And that's when God's troubles began. God put Adam in a beautiful place called the Garden of Eden. But Adam was lonely, so God took one of his ribs and created a woman, Eve, to be with him and do his work.
They would have been happy forever, but a snake crawled into the garden. God told Adam and Eve he did not create the snake, who really was his enemy, Satan.
One beautiful day, the snake offered Eve a cigarette. It was cork-tipped. He said, "Have a puff. It will bring you knowledge."
Eve, who was thirsting for knowledge, took a few puffs. When God smelled burning tobacco, he called down to Adam and asked, "Who's smoking?"
Adam said, "Eve. She had a few drags because she thinks it makes her smarter and look more sophisticated."
"I told you both that you were forbidden to light cigarettes in the Garden of Eden because it is a smoke-free zone."
Adam said, "Eve is trying to quit. But you can't expect her to go cold turkey in a month."
God was furious because they had disobeyed Him and decided to punish them. He made them leave the Garden of Eden and go out into the real world, which God was sorry he had ever created.
A few weeks after that, God looked down on Earth and saw a large forest fire that swept from Trenton to Malibu.
"Who set the forest fire?" God asked angrily.
Adam replied, "I think it was set off by someone smoking a cigarette."
God said, "There are only two of you on Earth. It must have been one of you."
Adam said, "We're trying to quit."
A year went by and God looked down and saw nothing but smog. He spoke to Adam through the soot and haze.
"I can't see anything," God coughed. "What's going on down there?"
"The smog is coming from the exhaust pipes of automobiles," Adam said.
"Automobiles?"
"Yes, our two sons, Cain and Abel, have car dealerships. Cain sells Chevrolets, Fords and Chryslers, and Abel deals with Honda, Nissan, BMW and Mercedes. They're very competitive, to the point where Cain is threatening to kill Abel. Half of all global warning comes from cars."
God asked, "And the other half?"
Adam said, "The other half is from burning coal, gas and oil, and cooking hamburgers on the barbecue."
God said, "The Earth seems to be getting warmer, the Artic ice is melting, and the Gulf Stream is changing course. Man has made a mess of the world I created."
Adam asked God, "So what are you going to do about it?"
God said, "I'm going to cause a flood to cover the land and start all over again. No more Mr. Nice God."
(Tribune Media Services)
2005.03.21