Re: Max&Ruby-soyul

[Teacher1]

1. The title of this story is Ruby's Safari.

Max surprised Ruby with a toy, but she said no because Louise would be arriving soon.

After Louise arrived, Ruby said that she hadn't completed the final backyard safari in the scrapbook and that she wouldn't get the badge. Louise then told her that the leader would pick up the scrapbook today, so they hurried to the backyard.

While searching with their binoculars, Max put a toy crocodile in front of Louise, surprising her. Ruby explained that they were finding special animal pictures for the scrapbook, not playing with toys.

Max felt disappointed but picked up a parrot toy and made a playful face.

When they searched for animal tracks, they heard an animal sound, but it was just Max's parrot toy. Louise and Ruby called for Max.

Later, while looking for a special animal, Louise found a giant spider. They took a picture, but the spider spread jelly balls, so Ruby called Max and scolded him.

Max then messed around with ladybug and red elephant toys. Ruby explained why she couldn't play with him.

Suddenly, a hummingbird sat on the red elephant toy, and they quickly took a picture.

The leader praised the scrapbook, explaining how the red color of the toy had attracted the hummingbird, and they ended happily.

Score: A

Tips)

1. "the hummingbird was attracted red color"는 "how the red color of the toy had attracted the hummingbird"로 수정해 문장을 더 자연스럽게 만들었습니다.
   (Changed "the hummingbird was attracted red color" to "how the red color of the toy had attracted the hummingbird" for smoother phrasing.)
2. Max의 행동과 Ruby가 그를 꾸짖는 장면을 조금 더 구체적으로 추가하면 이야기가 더 생생해질 수 있습니다.
   (Adding more detail about Max’s actions and Ruby scolding him could make the story more vivid.)
3. Louise와 Ruby가 거미를 발견했을 때의 감정이나 반응을 더 자세히 묘사하면 이야기가 흥미로워질 수 있습니다.
   (Describing Louise and Ruby’s reaction when they found the spider could enhance the story.)