"I would've been" or "I should've been"
grammar speech
When on a job interview and asked:
Tell us more about yourself.
How do I say something like:
...Well, I would've been a father but sadly my son died due to cord constriction...
My son died on the 35th week of pregnancy, just a few days shy of the due date.
asked Nov 14 '14 at 3:58

majidarif
edited Nov 14 '14 at 4:06
2
My deepest sympathy for your tragic loss. But, speaking for myself, I would not mention this extremely sad and personal tragedy in a job interview. – Mari-Lou A Nov 14 '14 at 4:53
1
@Mari-LouA Thank you. I agree, though, my wife was the one just asking me about this and I didn't know how to answer her so I asked here. I'll tell her the same thing. Again, Thank you. – majidarifNov 14 '14 at 5:09
1
I think that would be for the best. Once again, my deepest condolences. – Mari-Lou A Nov 14 '14 at 5:12
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2 Answers
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First of all, condolences on your loss.
The distinction between should have and would have is small but definite.
Should have generally refers to a piece of advice, or something that was supposed to happen but did not against expectation (in a negative sense).
You should have listened to me. Then you wouldn't have fallen down.
My arm should have healed by now, but it still hurts.
Would have generally refers to something that might have happened, but didn't due to a specific reason.
My arm would have healed, but I didn't take my medicine.
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answeredNov 14 '14 at 6:45

LightMikeE
505●2●8
Accepting this as it is short and clear. Thank you.– majidarif Nov 14 '14 at 7:07
@majidarif Glad to be of some small help – LightMikeE Nov 14 '14 at 7:10
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up vote1down vote
They are both ok, and both give the same main idea: A sad event prevented you from becoming a father.
"I would've been..." gives the meaning that if the accident had not happened, you would have had a child.
"I should've been..." gives the same meaning but also gives the idea that someone or something (for example, "God", the Universe, or you yourself" intended for you to be a father, or that you were supposeThey are both ok, and both give the same main idea: A sad event prevented you from becoming a father.
"I would've been..." gives the meaning that if the accident had not happened, you would have had a child.
"I should've been..." gives the same meaning but also gives the idea that someone or something (for example "God", "the Universe", or you yourself) intended for you to be a father, or that you were supposed to be a father.
For most listeners, the idea that you should have been a father would naturally be included no matter which way you said it.
We can make the second part of the sentence more conventional. Perhaps: "I would've/should've been a father, butd to be a father.
For most listeners, the idea that you should have been a father would naturally be included no matter which way you said it.
We can make the second part of the sentence more conventional. Perhaps: "I would've/should've been a father, but my (our) child died due to a cord constriction." If you wanted to, you could add more information like "died before birth due to..." or "died during pregnancy due to...."
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answeredNov 14 '14 at 6:56

Jim Reynolds
3,149●8●24
editedNov 14 '14 at 7:06
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