우리는 네비게이토 | 유영지 자매 간증입니다 - 중앙대 네비게이토 선교회

Hello! I am Yu Yeongji of the mustard seed team. I thank God to give me this opportunity of testimony. I was born in non-christian family and I had lived without God before I entered the university. And then, I met sisters at the time of checkup before entering the university and I heard the gospel and knew about God. Joining the fellowship I got a lot of graces and blessing from God and I want to share some of those.   Firstly, I came to realize grace of salvation and God's love.   Lately, I read Esther. When I read Esther, I recall my past life and I thank God to save me. Esther is about the story of a Jewish woman who became a queen of the Persian empire by God's guidance when Israeli were left in Persia. Esther could save Israeli from Haman's conspiracy to exterminate the Israeli helping Mordecai, her foster father. When I read this, I felt sympathy for wicked Haman more than righteous Esther and Mordecai. "Well, because King liked Mordecai more than Him, Haman would be jealous." I can understand Haman's heart that he want to curse Mordecai. Before I believe Jesus, I was the person like Haman. In last Christmas eve party, I recorded my voice acting main character Gongju's friend for skit. My role was to make Gongju more angry who failed in getting job saying "I expected we could work together..as for me, I was not confident but I am admitted hhh." At that time, I recorded my voice looking back on my past life and I did a quite good job and sisters said as a joke "You should not live like that~" It was me who wanted to be praised and cursed people in my heart who I didn't like.   Esther 7:9,10 Then Harbona, one of the eunuchs attending the king, said, "A gallows seventy-five feet high stands by Haman's house. He had it made for Mordecai, who spoke up to help the king." The king said, "Hang him on it!" 10 So they hanged Haman on the gallows he had prepared for Mordecai. Then the king's fury subsided.   Haman made a gallon standing before the yard of his house to hang Mordecai on it, but he fell into his own trap and he was hung on it. Whoever sees Haman's end would not feel sorry. They would think he deserved to die like that. I was also the person like Haman so I deserved to die like him. However, Jesus himself was hung on the tree instead of me.   "He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed." (1 Peter 2:24)   He was hung on the cross where I had to be hung. Because of me, He was crucified on the cross. I realized that it is me who crucified Jesus. But jesus said he would uphold me who is sinner to crucify him with his righteous right hand(Isaiah 41:10). I am not worthy of it and I am not lovely. Why did he save me? I had to be destroyed like Haman. To my question "Why did you save me?" Jesus answered with the words. "The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness."(Jeremiah 31:3). I burst into tears because of God's love to save me just because he loves me regardless of who I am. I don't deserve to be saved. I thank Jesus' love who shed all his blood and saved me. I live every day by God's graces that he always say to me he loves me and add endless graces.     Second, I lived my life experiencing the God in the wonderful guidance of God. Through preparing for the camping conference, we all are exciting as if we already left to Manlipo. It was the camping conference for a long time. When everyone left to sea, I used to stay with Se-rong in the vision hall. For two years, I learned a lot from the God through studying for transferring to the College of Pharmacy. Before believing Jesus, I wanted to be a pharmacist. In the worldy sight, it is a specialized, stable, and a highly-paid job. But believing Jesus and learning Jesus with sisters, I came to know the happy life in the Jesus. My values were changed from "I can be happy when I become something" to "I can be happy only by believing Jesus." And I just started to prepare this exam only to stay in the campus longer because I want to grow a faith in the campus. With the order of priority, I had a fellowship with God, studied hard, and applied to Chungang University, which was near for the fellowship with sisters.     But I was rejected. Even the day when I received that notification, I was calm because I could walk with God and enjoy the grace a lot. One friend called me. She told me that she passed the 1st test even though not having a good point in the test, and preparing her heart to study one more year. " I am really happy, and I am really thankful to the God", she said. She sometimes cried and suffered from anxiety about the future. So I used to help her to have a faith. And then I felt strange. Satan attacked me harshly.   "You did better than she did before the God.. To prioritize the God, you learned the words hard, prayed, studied, and helped the others.......and what is this result? Isn't is unfair? Go and blame the God. Satan was turning around me and try to throw me down. So scared, I ran to the cross in the 1st floor of the vision hall. And kneeling, I poured out my heart to God.   "God...I need your comfort. But I know that all this situation is in your good plan. Thank you for giving me a faith now." Then the promise God gave me in the QT that day came into my head.   Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this. He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. (Psalms 37: 5-6, NIV)   “God... you gave me this word...and I believe this word will be achieved. Satan incited me to blame the God. But I don't want it. How dare I blame you, God. I am so scared to say even a word "blame" before you. God, I think the person who are satisfied with only God is the happiest. I want to be like them. Because the God who is on the all is with me, I already get all. And you saved me, I am already successful. God, my dear God, I can't live without you....." After praying with praising him, My heart came to be hot.   Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. (Psalms 62:8, NIV)   Now I could understand David's praising, "God is my refuge", in the hardship. Refuge is the place we can escape from an enemy, and get rest. Even though Satan tried to throw me down, he didn't any attack to me when I escape to my God. I felt my shaking mind become calm as soon as I knelt to God. Escaping to the God was good choice, I thought. I had prayed for loving the God more because I felt a lack of love to God. So at that time, I cried a lot through confessing my love to God.       Third, thanks to God's grace, my character changed and I became to live a everlasting and valueable life of vision. I'm originally shy of strangers. So, I had difficulties to talk to first met people and felt too much pressure to make new friends. I wanted to change this character so went to an actor's academy in my middle school I thought that I could express myself freely in my dealings with others as I try to express myself on the stage. However, acting friends were mostly strong-minded.   Far from changing my character, I had a hard time in relations with other people and ran out from there.   'Yes.. It's not easy to change characters. It is said that it's close death when someone changes. Maybe I have to live what I am. I wanted to say that it was so good to believe in Jesus but it was too hard for me to talk to someone. I had an itching tongue and just scratched it. It was too hard for me to witness. When we had an enrolled students' meeting, I heard that sisters introduced Jesus to next seat students and I felt that it was really amazing and so high level. 'I also want to let someone know about Jesus.. Can it be possible? When will I change? I also want to be like sisters.' I wanted to change my character so I set applications after my Quiet Time to talk to anyone in class many times.   However it was too hard to say "From what page do we start today? Perhaps did we have a homework today? I can't understand this.. Can you explain it to me?" and I couldn't say anything and class was over.   I felt so frustrated and hated my character. I knelt down in front of the cross at vision hall's first floor, and often sang a song 'If you tells me'. 'If you tells me, I will go. If it is not your will, I will stop..' Lord, I can't go even though you tells me...   You say to me "Dear Yoengji, talk to that freid" but it is I who talks like "I can't. How can I do that?" Lord, God who created me... When Adam was sleeping, you took one of man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh.. Like that, when I am sleeping, please take my timid character and fill fully with bold character! Please change me!! After that I began my summer vacation. I was busy studying at that time so I mainly did my basic during STP and studied at our Library for the rest of the day.   I was so envious of other sisters who were growing up doing teamwork. But I thought that I could do my best at basic in my situation. So I did my basic thoroughly. And then, next semester, miracle happened.   Matthew4:19 "Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men."   "I have something to tell you. Can you remain after class?" and I preached the Gospel to my friend.   Thanks to God's grace, that friend received Jesus. It was not difficult to talk to next seat student. I introduced Jesus to my juniors who were my team. At that semester, I preached Jesus to all my friends. I was really surprised at my changed character. I was only doing my study during summer vacation. I was not practicing speaking exercise especially. It was true that only following Jesus make us fishers of men. I learned that Matthew4:19 is really true and the one that can change people is only God.       Thanks to God's grace, my character has been changed so I could get much benefits. I enjoyed meeting new people and I felt free. People said to me that my character is good. On the festival of X-mas, I played the skit and it was so exciting. Many people would like to change their character but it is impossible. But in God, we can resemble God through training. I give thanks this to God. Still I am lacked person but now I think lile this. ' How wouldn't they like me?' If a man of rank loves me with true mind and wants my own happiness and treats me 재소 bright smile. I can't help loving her. God made myself like this person. I am the daughter of God who has all authority of heaven and earth. I became the person who wants other's happiness with God's love. When I approach people with that mind, many people received Jesus Christ. Even though I am selfish and poor at service, God uses me as the blessing passage. I give thanks to God.   Psalm 116:12 How can I repay the LORD for all his goodness to me?   Matthew 28:19,20 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."   God gave me new life and filled a lot of grace in my life. I want to repay God's grace. I want to live the life that only Jesus is my goal. My prayer request is to love God the most, to repay God's grace, to train hard with having aim, Jesus and to gain faithful souls. Thank you.