영어 어색한부분, 문법틀린것 좀 봐주세요,,, ^^;;

[beellen]

제가 쓴 자기소개입니다 50초 정도 분량

My name is,,,,
I am expect to be graduated from Inha university
While I am in university I realized that I am very active person
I always try to experience as many things as I can
so In my school days I joined in volunteers club
and(여기서 적당한 연결어를 못찾겠어요ㅜㅜ 자연스럽게) I was immediately fascinated by the feeling coming from
helping the people who are in need
also I did a part time job in the international airport
where I have improved in many aspact of my customer service skills
and with the money I saved up
I traveled in India and Nepal for about one year
there I had a good chance to learn various world culture
and I realized how pleasant it is to meet new people and get to know the others


전공선택동기

I majored in Public administration
The reason why I choosed this major
was that I have a great interest in contemporary social issues in my high school
especially the part about the gap between rich and poor and the social welfare
The more I studied I purely addicted to it
Thus I have made up my mind that I would study more on society in detail in university




글을 자연스럽게 연결하는게 정말 힘드네요,,,ㅜㅜ
도와주시면 정말 감사하겠습니다,,
문법틀린것도 많을 것 같은데 좀 봐주시구요,, 어색한 문장이나,,

[글로버엔지니어]

면접 준비하는 과정인듯 하네요..우선 간략하게 감사하다는 표현이 좋을듯합니다 First of all, thank you for giving me a chane to have an interview with ur company. My name is ( ) and I will be graduating ( will graduate or am going to graduate) from university on 날짜 I could realize that I am very outgoing and active through school life (university life) I always try to experience as much as I can so I have a social club doing volunteer work for people who need help, which made me able to learn a lot of things especially How important ‘voluntourism’ is to me.

[글로버엔지니어]

(I was immediately fascinated by the feeling coming from helping the people who are in need 정확히 무슨뜻인지 몰라라서 제가 생각한대로 썼습니다.) I also had a part-time job in the international airport that made me able to learn and improve customer service skills. (저축을 햇단 말인가요? 이부분은 없어도 댈듯해서 생략햇음). I`ve traveled in India and Nepal for the last year and I could get a valuable opportunity to learn foreign culture. Most of all, I could realize how beautiful it is (for me) to meet and know new people

[글로버엔지니어]

도움이 되었으면 합니다. 100% 맞다고는 생각하진 않지만.. 강의를 들은적이 있는데 이미 서류통과가 대셨다면 영어인터뷰에서 영어의 유창성을 크게 기대 하지는 않는다고 하더군요 만약 영어를 네이티브처럼 잘하는 사람을 원한다면 교포를 쓰면 댄다고 하면서요. 좋은 결과 있기를 바랍니다..

[beellen]

아,,, 넘 감사합니다,,, 정말 멋지시네요! ^^ 열심히 연습해서 꼭 붙을게용! 정말 감사