Trusting God When You’re Tired of Trying

Trusting God When You’re Tired of TryingASHLEY MORGAN JACKSON Lee en español “Thus says the LORD: ‘The people who survived the sword found grace in the wilderness; when Israel sought for rest, the LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.’” Jeremiah 31:2-3 (ESV) Picking up my phone off the nightstand that morning, I opened it with dread. Anxiety filled my body at what I knew I would find there — other people enjoying their lives while I cried about mine. Life felt so unfair. I tried to blink back hot tears while whispering a desperate prayer: Lord, am I going to feel like this forever? As I poured my coffee, I made a mental list of what I felt like I could no longer handle. For starters: battling relentlessly with my mental health, not to mention juggling two kids under 5, my husband’s unforeseen job loss, the sudden passing of my father-in-law, and ongoing financial pressures — just to name a few things. There didn't seem to be any relief in sight, and it was hard not to feel frustrated, fed up, and maybe even a little forgotten by God. My soul was exhausted, and I was tired of trying. It seemed I had prayed every prayer I knew how to pray and read every scripture I knew that pertained to my circumstances. And yet nothing seemed to change. Maybe you know this season all too well. Maybe you’ve been hurting so deeply and for so long. Maybe you expected to handle this better, to be stronger when everything came crashing down. But it’s OK that you’re feeling weak and unsure — because God wants us to let go of having to figure it all out and instead let Him do what He does best: save us. When God commanded Moses to save His people from slavery in Egypt, the Israelites never expected their freedom journey to take so long or be so hard. But God took them through the wilderness to teach them dependence on Him and ultimately to bring them into the good land He had prepared for them. In Jeremiah 31, we see the Lord say in reference to that time, “The people who survived the sword found grace in the wilderness; when Israel sought for rest, the LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you” (Jeremiah 31:2-3). God hears our cries for deliverance, and He has grace for us in our wilderness. As I continued to walk through my own wilderness season with the Lord, I began to realize that all the things I thought were breaking me, He was in fact using to make me more like Jesus. I was exhausted because I believed it was all up to me. But as I chose to trust God to hold my broken heart and received His grace each day, He began to reveal the good plans He had all along. Friend, will we dare to remember the heart of God when it is hard to understand why He is not fixing our most hurtful seasons? Will we trust that, like the Israelites, we, too, will find grace in our wilderness? Will we cling to the truth that God has restfulness for our worn-out souls and He will never stop loving us? Regardless of how we feel, we can stand in the confidence that God will continue to be faithful. Oh Lord, thank You for hearing my exhausted prayers when life feels like it’s just too much and I’m desperate for solutions. Help me to hold on to You in faith and stand on the truth of who I know You to be: a good, faithful and loving Father who always has my best in mind. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.