040 Stop Bullying! It is Murder!

040 Stop Bullying! It is Murder!     20120102   A middle school student committed suicide by throwing himself from his apartment in Daegu in the dead of night on December 20, 2011. He left a suicide note on the table in his living room. It aroused the anger of people. He was bullied almost every day for a few months, but he always just put up with it not to worry his parents.     The incident began with a popular online game, Maple Story. The first bully, S, forced him to raise the level of S in the game joining it together. S blackmailed him for the money to buy some game items, so the victim pressed his mother for more money. Later, he had to take a part time job to make money for the bully. S kept him from studying asking him to play it more time. S even took away his textbooks and reference books. The victim who played it instead of S was hacked and lost all the items of the game in September. Since then, the bullying had been worse and more serious. S used even violence for him at the school and his house. S made him buy brand-name clothes and took from him. He also compelled him to smoke.   Far from stopping S from bullying, his two classmates, U and K, rather joined him after they had known it. Another bully U joined it since October, and K since November. They even forced him to do their homework and beat him frequently. The victim’s parents were teachers, and mob violence happened between ‘after school’ and ‘the end of working hour of his parents’: between 3:30pm and 5:00pm. On December 19, K slapped him and made him kneel and raise his hands holding a radio. The victim had to pick up and eat the cookie crumbs fallen on the floor with the wire around his neck like a dog. After violence and insult, K returned, and S and U entered his house soon. They beat him up bound to the piano stool, tried to cut his body and burn his arm. The newspaper said that they punched him, kicked, and tortured him even in water. That night, he committed bullycide, not standing the pain any more.   It was hard for me to believe that just 14-year-old boys did the wicked acts like that. What made me more sad was his house, which should be the most safe place in the world, was the scene of a crime, bullying. Since the terrible incident was reported, his suffering has stayed deep inside me all the time over the past two weeks. The bad boys even ate the foods at his house at whim. The victim got nearly 300 threatening text messages from the bullies, and was deprived of almost 960.000won according to the police’s report.   His detailed will awoke a great echo in our society. Many of the neglected victims in indifference from school violence came out in front of us. Surprisingly, it is reported that a girl attending the same school killed herself only 5 months ago. If the school had handled the previous incident properly, another tragedy would have been prevented. Outside of that, many cases are being revealed every day.   Over the past year, U, a class president in a vocational high school in Nonsan, used violence against his classmates in the classroom in his homeroom teacher’s absence. Especially three classmates were severely bullied by him. U tried to strangle A saying that it was just a game, and beat C up for the reason of not getting the right expected test questions in advance. What was worse, he hit them on the palm and thigh with an iron pipe with three tied to the chairs during the break. The homeroom teacher learned to know it through his classmate’s report. Despite the teacher’s discipline, he beat them up dozens of times in the school corridor unobserved. No one dared to lift a finger against him, because he had a big build and class leader. A relative of one victim reported it to the police, and only then did the school kick him out on the basis of rules. However, to expel the troubled students from school wasn’t an all-solution.   Living together, some expelled students in Busan robbed the students from their old school. They hauled some juniors to a nearby public restroom, and beat them and took the money and jackets from them. The student who had reported to the police was beaten more bitterly and still stripped of his money. They were able to threaten and rob students without being interrupted. They even stole money at their houses while their parents weren’t home. Their stolen money and jewelry added up to the value of over 27million won for a month at the end of last year. After arrested, they even ridiculed the police saying that they would not be punished by the law because they are under 19 and they also could have help from a public defender.     Kim Hyeonsoo, a doctor who specializes in counseling youth, said that less than 10% of school violence is reported to the police. Nevertheless, police statistics indicated that the attackers reached 19,660 by the November in 2011. The reason that many victims don’t report is clear. Where drums beat, laws are silent. Though reported, they are usually released with a warning. So the victims will suffer more severe revenge. It is no use reporting without protection policy of the reporters and victims.     There was a policeman who sent several high school students who reported violence back saying that it wasn’t his jurisdiction. So they had to visit two more police stations. It seems that school violence is a devil of a job to the police.   The local education offices survey school violence twice a year. Students fill out questionnaires in their each classroom. Some students say, “We can’t write the whole truth under other friends’ eyes.” The education offices also eval‎uate all the school per year. School violence is a black mark against school. That’s why school officials are busy hiding it. Though a girl suffered from bulling for 4month, her school even insisted that they were not responsible for it because the crime site wasn’t at school.   After the incident in Daegu, many suggestions for stamping school violence out are pouring from all walks of life. Choi Jongsul, a professor in the Department of Police Administration in Dong-Eue University, insisted that an exclusive police system for it should be adopted. He said if a proportion of policemen concentrate all their efforts on student guidance including preventing violence and protecting the victims, it will have the positive result. Park Jeongwhan, a teacher in Chungmoo middle school in Tongyoung, said that an anonymous tip-off with cellphone would be a useful alternative on the basis of his experience. He added that teachers must try to solve the matters which were reported immediately. “The key was to gain students’ trust above all”, he emphasized. According to the self survey of the school, the ratio of the students who were beaten was down from 4.4% in 2010 to 1.2% in 2011. Megastudy, the nation’s largest internet online education company for middle and high school students, said that they would make a special lecture for preventing school violence and offer it free of charge. KFTA, the Korean Federation of Teachers Associations, told the press they would make stickers and give them out across the country, ‘Seeing violence, let’s shout STOP!’. Lee Juho, the Minister of Education, also came up with a new policy that the attackers and their parents are summoned and have to get a special lesson. If they refuse the order, they should be transferred to another school by force. The National Police Agency announced that the telephone number for reporting would be simplified to 117. National Assembly also decided the amendment that the attacker’s parents must cover the medical expenses of the victims.   But the proposers have to remember why victims didn’t let the adults around them know about their pain. The victims knew well where the teacher was, where the police station was and what the phone number was. They might dither over saying their painful situations whenever they saw the teachers and the policemen. They also might pick up the receiver and put it down numerous times. What killed them was the absolute despair: nobody could release them from the devil’s trap. The solution to this matter is the practical system for victims’ protection and people’s willingness to enforce it, I think. Daegu educational office already had a good crisis management guideline against suicide in 2010. Many of the teachers in the district got education about it. Nevertheless, it didn’t work properly.   Therefore, we need additional several principles, and must keep them.   Firstly, we need Zero Tolerance Policy about all the school violence, even if it was trifle. A principal in a middle school told a reporter it was just a play between boys when he saw a boy take off another boy’s pants before the girl-students in the playground. I was surprised at his level of awareness about sexual harassment. I’m afraid whether that he might say it is just a play though he sees violence before the victim dies. Schools also might tend to protect the rights of bad attackers rather than the poor victims. Sally Sanders, a librarian in Robert Clock School in England, said, “If the school violence happens, we are informed all of it including teachers, students and parents. Sharing information with each other, we respond strongly to it. We never hide or forgive it easily.”      Secondly, we should teach the students to remember ‘Seeing violence, let’s shout STOP!’. Moon Yongrin, an former Education Minister, pointed out many attackers bullied the weak one before many students to show off their power. “We should educate 30 students help one victim who is bullied by three”, he added.     Thirdly, schools must try to have more time to communicate with parents. I can’t understand that most of school events are held on weekdays. While I was living in Taiwan, I attended at the parent-teacher meetings at seven in the evening. Parents including fathers filled each classroom. They even had a graduation ceremony in the evening, and a sports day on Saturday. Schools have to be more considerate of the working mothers. The victim and a leading attacker in Daegu case were door-key children.     Fourthly, the department system by subject should be introduced into middle and high school. This system required teachers stay almost always in the classroom. In addition, CCTV in the school corridors will help in the prevention of violence.   Lastly, we should throw away the biased image on victims: they might be fools or cowards. The mother of the victim in Daegu always said to his son, “Be good, and behave sincerely.” In the face of his son’s death, she regretted her words in tears. But, I don’t believe that she was wrong. The blame should be put on the attackers and, by extension, on adults, not to mention the attacker’s parents, who didn’t teach consideration for others.   It is said that the obverse of love is indifference not hate. This truism is very clear at the educational arena. Children grow up with love, and die from indifference. The two main suspects in Daegu incident were arrested after ten days of suspention, and the principal was relieved of his post. As you may know, this is the beginning, not the end, of the reformation of our education. I hope our society won’t have the children who long for peace through death.   It is time for me to add the last lines of the suicide note of the boy in Daegu.   ‘… I was sad whenever I saw a lot of bruise on my body behind family members… I am really sorry, but I know this is the most undutiful thing. However, I will be shamful to my parents, if I live like this… I will await the reunion with my family for 100 years or 1000 years… Thank you, father, for your always loving me… Thank you, mother, for your always forgiving me with a smile… Thank you, brother, for your always being nice to me… Thank you, friends, for your being friends to me… Thank you, teachers, for your encouraging me… Thank you!   I was blurred with tears that I couldn’t see my family members any more rather than finishing my pain. You never grieve over my death, and never give up your life like me. I will be sad, if my family members are sad. I cross my fingers for your happiness. Best Regards, The youngest who deeply loves my family P.S. Now, I want to tell my parents that I really love you. Mother and father, I love you!!!!’   <도움을 받을 수 있는 주요 기관·단체들> 경찰청 학교폭력신고 117 (문자#0117) 교육청 학교폭력 긴급 신고전화 1588-7179 학교폭력SOS지원단 1588-9128 헬프콜 청소년전화 1388 (휴대폰:지역번호+1388) 한국청소년상담원 02-730-2000 안전드림홈페이지 <A href="http://www.safe182.go.kr/">www.safe182.go.kr</A>