00:14
when I was growing up as a child I was
00:18
teased very often for being so
00:20
distracted teased for being distracted
00:23
teased for not being able to concentrate
00:24
and you know had I not been born a few
00:28
decades ago I probably would have been
00:29
given one of those colorful acronyms
00:31
like a DD or ADHD branded and probably
00:34
drugged for not being able to
00:37
concentrate right was until I was in my
00:40
early 20s when I graduated from
00:42
university I grew up in Australia and I
00:44
left and went to Hawaii where I joined
00:47
my gurus monastery was a cloistered
00:49
traditional Hindu monastery where he
00:51
taught me how to concentrate and that's
00:54
really what I want you to keep in mind
00:55
this concept of being taught how to
00:57
concentrate it's in my humble opinion
00:59
that most people can't concentrate today
01:01
for two reasons one is we're never
01:05
taught how to concentrate and second is
01:07
we don't practice concentration right so
01:11
how can you do something if you're never
01:13
taught how to do it and how can you be
01:16
good at something if you don't practice
01:18
it let's take a little survey here how
01:22
many of you here in the audience growing
01:24
up in school will formally taught how to
01:27
concentrate can we show or have a show
01:29
of hands like formal training in
01:30
concentration in school like classes
01:33
every week okay one person and two
01:37
people in this entire audience right so
01:41
here's a question for you
01:42
how many of you in this room here
01:44
growing up were told to concentrate
01:49
and that amazing people tell us to
01:52
concentrate but they don't tell us how
01:54
to and I got told to concentrate all the
01:56
time
01:56
dhandapani concentrated on eating you
01:58
food dhandapani concentrated on doing
02:00
your homework anybody want to show me
02:03
how to do it how many of you here have
02:05
children okay how many of you tell your
02:08
children to concentrate do you show them
02:12
how to no right and then you wonder why
02:15
they can't concentrate
02:16
you can't expect somebody to do
02:18
something if you don't teach them how to
02:21
do it and then if they want to be good
02:23
at it they have to practice it right so
02:26
if I wanted to play for the Chicago
02:27
Bulls so dance for the San Francisco
02:30
Ballet Company and I asked people this
02:32
question all the time in my talk to ask
02:34
them how many hours a day should I
02:36
practice the general answer is usually
02:39
about eight hours a day six days a week
02:42
and then I asked them so after six
02:45
months can i play for the bolts the
02:47
answers usually no after a year no but
02:51
I'd be better at basketball right I'd be
02:53
a better ballet dancer so you imagine if
02:56
you practice distraction eight hours a
02:58
day six days a week
03:00
what would you be good at after six
03:02
months distraction after a year you'd be
03:07
really good at distraction after year
03:09
and a half you've been expert a
03:12
distraction you'd like you to write the
03:13
New York Times bestseller and
03:15
distraction TEDx would invite you to
03:17
come and give a keynote on distraction
03:19
you'd get on stage you'd be so
03:21
distracted you forget what you were
03:22
supposed to talk about right that's how
03:24
good you are all right but the truth is
03:28
we don't practice distraction eight
03:30
hours a day six days a week
03:32
the truth is we probably practice it
03:34
more like sixteen hours a day seven days
03:37
a week
03:37
that rich person sleeps about seven to
03:39
eight hours to say roughly so we'll wait
03:42
for about sixteen hours of the day let's
03:45
just say on average we're practicing at
03:47
13 hours a day seven days a week
03:50
distraction and then you wonder why
03:52
you're so good at it
03:54
that's the law of practice the law of
03:56
practice is that we become good and
04:00
whatever it is we practice whether it's
04:02
positive or negative it doesn't matter
04:04
if you practice something over and over
04:06
and over again you become really good at
04:08
it and that's why people are so good at
04:11
distraction because it's what they
04:12
practice why aren't people good at
04:14
concentration because they never taught
04:16
it and they never practice it they don't
04:19
need to be drugged they just need to be
04:21
taught how to do it
04:22
children don't need to be drugged they
04:24
just need to be taught how to
04:26
concentrate and then they need to
04:28
practice it just like anything else to
04:30
become good tennis player to become a
04:31
good dancer to performer
04:33
anything practice practice practice and
04:36
then people say things like technology
04:39
are great distractors right smart phones
04:42
oh I have this thing so distracting my
04:45
smartphone the Internet are they
04:49
distract us I'd like to say no first and
04:52
then yes but mostly no why let me tell
04:56
you a story so when I left Australia
04:59
after University and went to Hawaii to
05:01
be a monk it was a very traditional
05:03
monastery so when you join a monastery
05:05
like the one I did you literally have to
05:07
give everything up your family your
05:09
friends everyone you know everything you
05:11
owned and when you got to the monastery
05:13
you're given a set of robes a set of
05:16
beads and a MacBook Pro laptop okay yes
05:21
I did say a Mac so every month got a Mac
05:25
and when iPhones came out we had an
05:27
iPhone as well and it's it's really
05:30
interesting it's always fascinating to
05:31
me to see people's reactions when I tell
05:34
them about monks with Macs you know and
05:36
I remember this this lady once that came
05:38
to visit the monastery and she asked me
05:41
a question and I said to her why don't
05:43
you send me an email and I could email
05:46
you back or response my teacher wrote up
05:48
and it will give you some nice insights
05:51
she looked at me kind of strangely and
05:53
finally asked is it okay for monks to
05:55
use email I said of course it's okay for
05:58
monks to use email as long as there are
06:00
no attachments
06:06
some people just getting it now so
06:11
technology in itself is not a bad thing
06:13
it's actually a beautiful thing as long
06:16
as we're in charge of it but if every
06:19
time your iPhone beeps or makes a sound
06:22
and you turn to it and you go yes master
06:24
how can I serve you today then you live
06:27
in that world of distraction you it's
06:30
training you to be distracted but if you
06:33
actually use technology and Technology
06:36
is not a bad thing when I say yes
06:39
earlier the technology can be
06:40
distracting there are some aspects of
06:42
technology that can be distracting for
06:44
example in the Mac you have
06:45
notifications that drop down but that's
06:47
as easy as clicking on it and turning it
06:50
off turning off those notifications and
06:52
not responding but choosing what you
06:54
want to engage with right so technology
06:58
in itself is not a bad thing the
07:01
question is do we choose to engage in it
07:04
or not so how do we become good at
07:08
concentrating we start by understanding
07:11
the mind right all of us have a mind
07:15
it's the most powerful tool in the world
07:18
built a smartphone it's put machines
07:22
that drive itself on Mars yet there's no
07:25
manual for the mind right when was the
07:28
last time you saw a manual for the mind
07:30
yet you you buy a point and shoot camera
07:33
whose only purpose and duty is to point
07:36
and shoot it comes with a hundred page
07:38
manual right yet we have the most
07:41
complex tool in the world on mine and
07:43
there's no manual so the first thing I
07:46
learnt when I went to the monastery was
07:48
to learn how the mind works because once
07:51
you know how the mind works you can
07:52
control it and once you can control it
07:54
you can focus it you can't focus or
07:57
concentrate something you don't
07:59
understand so how does the mind work
08:01
from the monks perspective on the monks
08:04
experience of the mind there's two
08:06
things that you need to understand one
08:09
is there's awareness and one is the mind
08:11
so take a few moments to explain this to
08:14
you and share what they are see
08:15
imagine awareness as a glowing ball of
08:17
light like an orb that can float around
08:20
okay so that's awareness now imagine
08:22
your mind as a vast space vast area with
08:26
many different sections within it one
08:28
area of the mind is anger jealousy food
08:31
sex happiness joy signs up and this
08:35
glowing ball of light call awareness can
08:37
travel within the mind and it can go to
08:39
any area of the mind it wants to go to
08:41
and when it goes to a particular area of
08:43
the mind it lights up that area when it
08:46
lights up that area of the mind you
08:48
become conscious of it so give you an
08:50
example
08:51
your friend invites you to go see a
08:52
movie for example okay hey dub do you
08:55
want to go see Mission Impossible 16
08:57
sure let's go okay so you go to the
08:59
theater you're watching you know you sit
09:01
down the lights all on you're chatting
09:02
with your friend the lights dim the
09:04
movie starts if it's a really great
09:06
director producer he or she can take
09:09
your awareness to any area of the mind
09:10
they want you to go to right they can
09:12
take you to a sad area mind to happy
09:15
area of the mind the movie can get
09:16
really exciting thrilling suspenseful
09:18
scary and it's 90 minutes later you you
09:23
see two words on the screen and it says
09:24
the end and you turn to your friend and
09:27
you go like wow that was an amazing
09:28
movie but you paid 13 or 14 or 15
09:33
dollars or whatever it is to allow that
09:36
director to take your awareness of
09:37
different areas of the mind and this
09:39
happens on a daily basis each day we
09:41
allow someone or something throughout
09:43
the day to take our awareness from one
09:46
area of the mind to another when we
09:48
allow a person or something to do that
09:51
we're being distracted the art of
09:53
concentration is the art of keeping
09:55
awareness that ball of light on one
09:58
thing for an extended period of time
10:00
every time the ball of light drifts away
10:03
we bring it back it drifts away again we
10:06
bring it back right so that's the theory
10:08
you have awareness and you have the mind
10:10
you are not the mind when people say my
10:13
mind wanders all the time technically
10:15
that's a false statement what one does
10:18
is your awareness your awareness is
10:19
moving within your mind so that's the
10:22
theory of it so let's do a simple little
10:24
practical exercise to see if this
10:26
actually works oh it's just a monk rude
10:28
you talk okay so for that I need
10:31
audience participation I need all of you
10:33
to sit up straight in your chat okay so
10:35
if you have anything in your lap a hand
10:36
just place it down on the ground
10:38
sit up straight in your chair with your
10:41
spine straight if you're leaning back to
10:42
sit forward a little bit I want you to
10:44
close your eyes take a slow deep breath
10:47
in and I want you to become aware of the
10:51
room become aware of the chat you're
10:53
sitting on become aware of any sounds
10:58
you might hear the sound of my voice the
11:00
humming of the projector or
11:02
air-conditioning now I want you to
11:06
become aware of the most recent wedding
11:09
that you attended
11:10
do you remember whose wedding it was who
11:14
is getting married did you approve of
11:16
the marriage try and think everything
11:20
you can about the wedding did you go by
11:23
yourself did you go with your family was
11:27
it a large wedding hundreds of people or
11:30
was it small and intimate with maybe
11:31
2030 people how was the food was it good
11:36
was there alcohol did you drink a lot do
11:43
you even remember remember how much you
11:44
drank do you remember what the bride was
11:50
wearing
11:50
did she make a good choice now I want
11:56
you to remember the most recent holiday
11:59
that you went on the most recent
12:01
vacation that you went on do you
12:03
remember where it was
12:05
what kind of vacation was it anyway
12:07
was it a yoga retreat was it a wellness
12:12
trip was it educational was it adventure
12:15
how long did you go for what was the
12:19
weather like over there try and think
12:21
everything you can about this vacation
12:26
did you spend a lot of money
12:29
how is the food spicy bland bad did you
12:34
get sick eating the food
12:38
now your eyes are still closed I want
12:41
you to become aware of the room again
12:43
become aware of the chair that you're
12:45
sitting on the sound of my voice humming
12:50
of the air-conditioner or projector now
12:54
slowly open your eyes and sell back in
12:56
your seats again okay
13:00
that was a very simple exercise to prove
13:03
two things to you one is there's a clear
13:05
separation between awareness and the
13:08
mind and second is you can actually take
13:10
your awareness and move it to any area
13:13
of the mind that you want it to go to
13:15
because you just allowed me to do that I
13:17
took your awareness from this room
13:19
becoming aware of this chair that you're
13:21
sitting on the sound of my voice there
13:23
conditioning the projector and you went
13:25
to the waiting area of the mind and the
13:27
longer you stayed there the more you
13:29
thought about the wedding how do I know
13:31
you were thinking about it because I had
13:33
my eyes open and when I asked you a
13:34
question like did the bride make a bad
13:36
choice some of you and like with a dress
13:42
yes so I knew you were thinking about
13:44
the wedding right and then you went from
13:46
the wedding area of the mine and you
13:48
traveled all the way to the vacation
13:49
area of the mine and you stayed there
13:51
and while you were in the vacation area
13:53
of the mind you when thinking about the
13:54
wedding all about the room and then you
13:56
went from the vacation area of the mind
13:58
back to the room again and I made you
14:00
think about the chair the room and you
14:03
when thinking about the wedding or the
14:04
vacation then and this is what's happens
14:07
all day we are now people and things
14:09
around us to take awareness to from one
14:11
area of the mind to another all day long
14:14
from the time we wake up and therefore
14:17
we become distracted to be concentrated
14:20
is to be able to keep your awareness on
14:22
one thing for an extended period of time
14:25
how do we practice this we practice this
14:28
by doing one thing at a time throughout
14:30
the day what's the best way to develop
14:32
concentration the best way to develop
14:34
concentration is to bring that practice
14:36
into our everyday life look at
14:39
opportunities throughout your day in
14:41
your average day ask yourself what's a
14:43
great opportunity to practice
14:44
concentration how many of you have a
14:46
spouse a partner that you live with
14:49
quite a few of you every time you speak
14:51
with your spouse or your partner keep
14:54
that ball of light that awareness on
14:56
that person it drips away bring it back
14:58
it drifts away bring it back the more
15:00
you practice this the more you become
15:03
better at concentration give her or him
15:07
your undivided attention so if you speak
15:11
to your spouse for two hours a day what
15:13
a great opportunity to practice
15:14
concentration every time you speak with
15:17
your child practice concentration
15:19
parents can love to me all the time and
15:22
say down the paani how can I teach my
15:24
children to concentrate very easy you
15:27
learn to concentrate first now there's a
15:31
little saying that goes monkey sees
15:33
monkey do you know and if you can't
15:37
concentrate
15:37
you can't expect your child to
15:39
concentrate and if you don't teach your
15:41
children how to concentrate how can they
15:43
possibly learn how to concentrate they
15:46
can't the benefits of concentration are
15:48
endless right when you're able to
15:52
concentrate you're able to focus all
15:54
your energy into a single given point
15:56
life is a manifestation of where your
15:59
energy is flowing and if you can't
16:02
concentrate your energy the things that
16:04
you want to manifest in your life
16:05
becomes very very challenging so learn
16:09
to concentrate by doing one thing at a
16:11
time
16:11
bring this practice into everything that
16:14
you do throughout the day make it a part
16:17
of your life practice practice practice
16:20
keep bringing awareness back and keep it
16:23
focused on one thing at a time
16:28
share this knowledge with your children
16:30
be an example for them so they can grow
16:32
up let's stop drugging our children and
16:35
solve the simple problem by teaching
16:38
them how to concentrate and helping them
16:41
to practice concentration be unwavering
16:45
in your focus proceed with confidence
16:47
because life is meant to be lived
16:49
joyously
16:49
and it all begins by learning how to
16:53
concentrate and staying focused thank
16:55
you very much everyone