Re: Read It (Logan)

[Teacher Winget]

Today, I'll introduce 'virtual tourism' to you. It is a great way to see the whole world. People use Virtual Reality headsets or touch-simulating gloves. We can browse many of the world's mot most famous attractions such as the Great Wall of China or the monariza Mona Lisa, without leaving our home and or dealing with noisy crowds. You don't have to pack your bag or wait in line. Even it is It’s even very cheap or free of charge. So next time you're thinking of traveling somewhere, I reccomend recommend trying virtual tourism.

Score: A-

Tips:

1. 'mot'는 'most'로 고쳐야 해요.
2. 'monariza'는 'Mona Lisa'로 바꾸는 것이 맞아요.
3. 'and the noisy crowds' 대신 'or dealing with noisy crowds'로 바꾸면 더 자연스럽게 들려요.
4. 'Even it is very cheap'보다 'It’s even very cheap'가 더 맞는 표현이에요.
5. 추가 팁: 가상 관광의 장점을 잘 설명했어요! 가고 싶은 다른 장소를 더 추가하거나, 왜 가상 관광이 편리한지 구체적인 예를 더 들어보면 더욱 풍부한 글이 될 거예요.