|
긍정적으로
안 평범한 삶을
살고 싶은데
영어 이야기 2077
inordinate
in|ɔːrdinət
평범하지 않은
며칠 전에 치과에 갔는데
진료시간도 길고 치료과저이 매우 힘들었다.
진료 후에 나는 의사에게 이런 말을 했다.
I wonder if I was a patient patient.
내가 참 참는 (patient) 환자 (patient) 였을까
그 말을 들은 의사가 '멋진 답'을 했다.
You are an INORDINARY patient who endures pain of an INORDINARY degree.
당신은 보통이 아닌 정도의 고통을 견딘 환자였다.
그런 대화를 하면서
평범하지 않다는 말은 긍정적으로 사용되기도 하지만'
그 반대로 쓰이기도 한다는 진리(?)를 깨달았다.
예를 들어보면 ㅡ
이스라엘의 지도자인 모세 (Moses) 가 태어났는데
She became pregnant and gave birth to a son.
When she saw that he was a fine child,
그녀가 임신했고 아들을 낳았다.
그녀 (모세의 어머니)는 그가 (모세가) 멋진 아이임을 알았다.
여기서 모세를 fine boy 라고 했는데
나는 fine 대신 inordinary 라고 바꿨다.
fine boy 멋진 아이 대신 inordinary boy (평범하지 않는 아이) 라는 것이
모세가 비범하지 않음을
잘 표현한 것이라고
생각한 것이다.
inordinary는 1400년 초의
Latin어 ordinarius가
그 뿌리인데
정상적 또는 '평소의'라는
뜻이다.
그 앞에 '아니'라는 접두어 in을
더한 낱말이다.
모두 다 하는 것 (또는 사람)만
좇지 않고 자신만의
톡톡 튀는 말과 행동을 한다는 뜻이 아닐까..?!
그런 의미를 부정적으로 사용될 때도 없지 않다.
두 집단 (특히 나라)의 협상 과정에서 어느 한쪽이 ㅡ
It was nothing but an INORDINARY demand.
"그것은 말도 안되는 요구에 지나지 않았다,"고 하면 협상의 결과는
물거품이 되고만다.
inordinary 라는 표현은
1800 후반에서 1920 까지
많이 쓰이다가 2000년에
들어서면서 하향곡선을
그리고 있다.
부정적 의미의
평범하지 않은 일들이
많은 분야에서 판을 치기 (?)
때문일 것이다.
그래서 심리학자들은 이런 주장을 편다.
You may spend an INORDINARY amount of time wondering what you might have said or done.
당신은 당신이 말하거나 행동하는 일에 염려하며 생각하지도
못하는 시간을 보내는지 모른다
(Psychology Today, July 24, 2023)
또 이런 주장도 있다.
UNORDINARY times seem like old times.
비정상의 시간들은
옛 시간으로 보이는 듯하다.
우리는 평범한 오늘을
즐기고 싶은데 ㅡ
Bruce Y. Lee M.D., M.B.A.
INORDINATE idea
INORDINATE demand
INORDINATE desire
It was nothing but a inordinate demand.
터무니 없느 요구
A Funny Bone to Pick
MATING
Extremely funny or [weird];the [opposite] of [ordinary];being what makes you different.
But unordinary times seem like old times.
you will spend an inordinate amount of time in meeting people and interviewing others
patient was required to
endure pain of an inordinate degree.
Doing business in Sudan requires unordinary excessive amounts of documentation,
So she had an unordinary glance
The New ‘Ghostlighting’ Dating Trend
Two bad practices combine to create one terrible dating phenomenon.
Posted July 24, 2023
Reviewed by Hara Estroff Marano
KEY POINTS
More and more people have been reporting that they have experienced "ghostlighting" in the dating arena.
Ghostlighting occurs when people first ghost you and then, after they return, gaslight you about the reasons.
1800 후반 1920 up
2000 down
No, ghostlighting is a portmanteau of two oh-so-wonderful things that you probably prefer not to experience in dating but which are unfortunately oh-so-common: ghosting and gaslighting. Ghosting refers to the sudden disappearance of someone you've been dating or relationshipping, with no warning or explanation. Being ghosted is bewildering and confusing.
You may spend an inordinate amount of time wondering what you might have said or done.
ordinary (adj.)
c. 1400, ordinarie, "regular, customary, belonging to the usual order or course, conformed to a regulated sequence or arrangement," from Old French ordinarie "ordinary, usual" and directly from Latin ordinarius "customary, regular, usual, orderly," from ordo (genitive ordinis) "row, rank, series, arrangement" (see order (n.)).
From 1580s as "common in occurrence, not distinguished in any way." Its various noun uses, dating to late 14c. and common until 19c., are now largely extinct except in out of the ordinary (1893) in which the sense of ordinary is "established or due sequence; something regular or customary." In British education, Ordinary level (abbrev. O level), "lowest of the three levels of General Certificate of Education," is attested from 1947. Related: Ordinarily.
also from c. 1400
order (n.)
c. 1200, "body of persons living under a religious discipline," from Old French ordre "position, estate; rule, regulation; religious order" (11c.), from earlier ordene, from Latin ordinem (nominative ordo) "row, line, rank; series, pattern, arrangement, routine," originally "a row of threads in a loom," from Proto-Italic *ordn- "row, order" (source also of ordiri "to begin to weave;" compare primordial), which is of uncertain origin. Watkins suggests it is a variant of PIE root *ar- "to fit together," and De Vaan finds this "semantically attractive."
The original English word reflects a medieval notion: "a system of parts subject to certain uniform, established ranks or proportions," and was used of everything from architecture to angels. Old English expressed many of the same ideas with endebyrdnes. From the notion of "formal disposition or array, methodical or harmonious arrangement" comes the meaning "fit or consistent collocation of parts" (late 14c.).
Meaning "a rank in the (secular) community" is first recorded c. 1300. Sense of "a regular sequence or succession" is from late 14c. The meaning "command, directive" is first recorded 1540s, from the notion of "that which keep things in order." Military and honorary orders grew out of the fraternities of Crusader knights.
The business and commerce sense of "a written direction to pay money or deliver property" is attested by 1837; as "a request for food or drink in a restaurant" from 1836. In natural history, as a classification of living things next below class and next above family, it is recorded from 1760. Meaning "condition of a community which is under the rule of law" is from late 15c.
In order "in proper sequence or arrangement" is from c. 1400; out of order "not in proper sequence or orderly arrangement" is from 1540s; since 20c. principally mechanical, but not originally so ("and so home, and there find my wife mightily out of order, and reproaching of Mrs. Pierce and Knipp as wenches, and I know not what," - Pepys, diary, Aug. 6, 1666).
Phrase in order to "for the purpose of" (1650s) preserves etymological notion of "sequence." In short order "without delay" is from 1834, American English; order of battle "arrangement and disposition of an army or fleet for the purposes of engagement" is from 1769. The scientific/mathematical order of magnitude is attested from 1723.
There are three general reasons why someone might ghostlight you, and each says a lot about the person.
Consider cutting a ghostlighter out of your life or at least pushing for explanations and setting boundaries.
Source: Jamie Grill/Getty Images
Ghostlighting is a portmanteau of two oh-so-wonderful things that you probably prefer not to experience in dating but are unfortunately oh-so-common: ghosting and gaslighting.Source: Jamie Grill/Getty Images
On social media, more and more people have been reporting that they have experienced "ghostlighting" in the dating arena. And they haven't been talking about a nightlight shaped like Casper the Friendly Ghost.
No, ghostlighting is a portmanteau of two oh-so-wonderful things that you probably prefer not to experience in dating but which are unfortunately oh-so-common: ghosting and gaslighting. Ghosting refers to the sudden disappearance of someone you've been dating or relationshipping, with no warning or explanation. Being ghosted is bewildering and confusing. You may spend an inordinate amount of time wondering what you might have said or done.
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Gaslighting is a highly manipulative technique in which someone makes deceptive statements to you over an extended period of time in a way that makes you question your own judgment, perception of yourself, perception of reality, or even sanity. An example: A supervisor, who by definition has power over you, bullies you by claiming that you are bullying him or her. Or your significant other becomes furious about your lack of trust when you've caught him or her cheating on you.
Source: ariya j/Getty Images
Here are some of the phrases commonly used by gaslighters.Source: ariya j/Getty Images
So how does someone do both and ghostlight you? Well, after someone has unexpectedly gone vamoose from your life, that person may decide to return one day but not offer the requisite apology or explanation. Instead, that person may deny even ghosting you in the first place.
For example, the person may say, "I am getting back to you about going to see the movie," without acknowledging the fact that catching the opening of the 1991 film "Silence of the Lambs" in movie theaters is no longer possible. Even worse, that person may blame you. For example, that person may ask, "Why didn't you call or text me" or say "You just didn't try hard enough," when you called 10 times.
So why might someone ghostlight you? One possibility is that person's life circumstances changed in ways that the person is not willing to reveal or admit. In some cases, the changes could have been legitimately sensitive and private—a health or financial issue, say. Nevertheless, the person could have at least said that they had to deal with something and needed to pause, before departing.
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And regardless, why gaslight you upon return? Even if that person had been kidnapped by a bunch of New Cabbage Soup Diet cult members or something touchy like that, he or she could still accept responsibility for the situation. All of this can be a sign that the person is a not very good communicator or tends to have an avoidant personality.
A second possibility is that the person was actually more interested in someone else but didn't manage to seal the deal and is now returning from outer space to his or her fallback choice, namely you.
A third possibility is that the person is just plain manipulative, doesn't care about your feelings, is an inveterate liar, or some combination of these things. Don't expect this to be a stable long-term arrangement. After all, if marriage is a goal, wedding vows don't typically go, "to manipulate and be manipulated from this day forward, for worse and for worse."
THE BASICS
The Science of Mating
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If you do find someone ghostlighting you, ask yourself whether you even want to deal with anyone who would do such a thing. Again, ghosting is one thing. Gaslighting on top of that is sort of like adding uranium onto an already questionable pie. While you may be curious as to what happened, the juice may not be worth the squeeze. Remember, gaslighters specialize in blurring the lines of reality. So the chances of you getting an honest answer may be low. Closing the door may be the best thing to do.
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