다음은 제가 서울대 영문과에서 강의했던 내용을 온라인 용으로 정리한 것입니다. 앞으로 진행할 영작 스터디의 샘플로 보여 드립니다. Corrections는 학생들의 영작 중에 바로잡을 것을 추려 설명한 것입니다. 출처는 클린턴의 코소보사태에 관한 국민 담화문입니다.
한역문:
미군은 나토 동맹국들과 함께 전 유고연방 내 세르비아 공화국의 군사적 목표물들에 대한 공습을 개시했습니다.
클린턴 원문:
United States forces, acting with our NATO allies, have commenced airstrikes against Serbian military targets in the former Yugoslavia.
(A) United States forces: 미군은
Alternative: American forces
Capitalization: Although “United States” is a proper name and thus capitalizes, “forces” is lowercased because it is not a name but one of many different ways of referring to the forces America has. [Style/Capitalization]
forces: is pluralized when it refers to military units.
Corrections
- The United States forces: would mean the entire American military. [Grammar/Article] Since only a small part of the military is involved in the airstrikes, “the” should be removed.
- The United States army: is wrong because “army” means the landed military units.
- The United States military: is inappropriate because it means a country’s armed forces as a whole.
(B) acting with: ~ 과 함께
Alternative: together with
(C) our NATO allies: 나토 동맹국들
our: English habitually puts possessive adjectives even where Korean doesn’t. Here, “our” is used, while Korean omits “우리” in the corresponding place. [Note 1-4]
Corrections:
- the NATO allies: implies the entire allies, but there is no indication in the address that the entire allies, rather than some of them, are involved in the airstrike. [Article]
- our NATO alliance: is wrong because “alliance” means the relationship of being allies rather than allies itself.
- our NATO confederates: OK, but “confederates” is currently very little used.
(D) have commenced: 개시했습니다.
Alternatives: have started, have launched, (have begun)
Tense: The present perfect tense implies that the airstrike is now going on. [Grammar/ Present perfect]
Corrections
- have started to make: OK, but omit “to make” for brevity of expression.
(E) airstrikes: 공습
Alternatives: an air raid, air raids, an air attack, air attacks
Corrections:
- the airstrikes: Since the idea of air raid is being first introduced to the audience, it is assumed that the audience are not familiar with the airstrike, and thus the term is not uniquely identifiable for them. Hence, “the” is not appropriate here. [Article]
(F) against: ~ 에 대한
Alternative: on
(G) Serbian military targets: 세르비아 공화국의 군사적 목표물
Corrections:
- military objects / facilities: “object” means things in general and not as good as more specific words like “targets,” and “facilities” is not favored also for the same reason.
- the military targets: Clinton omits “the” here because they are not attacking the entire Serbian military targets.[Article]
(H) the former Yugoslavia: 전 유고 연방
- the: is required here because the former Yugoslavia is unique. [Article]