TV Channel 4 Sat Feb 14 06:23:24 2004
>>> We're not monsters. We're not throwaways we'e people with problems and now we're dealing with those problems.
>> They are gang members, murderers, rapists, thieves.
>> Y name is brother gil. I'm an ex-criminal, exgang member. Putting a gun in somebod's face.
>> In the ultimate selhelp program.
>> I hado feeling for them.
>> I knew all about pain,roken fingers, broken hands, broken legs, broken nose , shattered eye sockets. I've bee through all that.
>> The majority of the men in this program, there's a real change.
>> No one was killer when they were a kid. What happened?
>> One man is trying to change that, from the prison cell he shar with his son.
>> If there was any way that i could take his time from him and do his life sentence with mine and send him home, I'd gladly do it.
>> Tonight, lifers. Are they addicted to crime?
>>> Those 12-step programs, pioneered by alcoholics anonymous now seem to cover ny addiction one can imagine. This afternoon we typed 12-step program into an internet search engine, the computer churned out hundreds of listings, everything from alcoholics to spendaholics to webaholics a nymous. The 12-step concept grew out of an evangel@al movement that applied religious traditions @such as confession, restitution and prayer, to he p people in their daily lives. Those principles in turn were adooptded and refined by the founders of the group that came to be called alcoholics anonymous. Now those 12 steps have been applied t all kinds of human frailties including some fairl frivols ones, butne serious experiment in california certainly deserves watching. In a prison housing some of the state's most vicious criminls, a convicted murderer has set up a 12-step program or gang members ncluding his own so. The idea is that gang membership can be seen and treated as addictions. Ju muller obtained exclusive and u precedented access to the prison, the program and the father who is on mission to set his o son straight.
>> Reporter: In los angeles last ar, gang violence t k the lives of 259 people. And that number only hints at the problem. Poli say there are ome 400 gangs operating in this city, with morehan 48,00 members. Father ggory boyle, who has buried hundreds of gang members over t years, knows how hard it is to break that deadly allegianc .
>> You ask them, knowing what you know and knowing w t the consequences will be of being here, why are you here? D they'll pause and they'll always say, wel , i guess I'm just addicted. >> Reporter: But what if that addict n could be broken? This store se about a man who is devoting his life to that idea. >> He's an extrao dinary man among perhaps the holiest human beings I'v ever met.
>> Report r: That man lives here at mule creek state prison near sacramento. I'm judy muller. Richard mejico is serving a life sentence f@r murder.
>> My name is richard. You guys all know me. Hat we're doing here today is important. You guys all know that criminals and gag members are the oldest addicts in this world. They were the first. But cga is the first the-step recovery program t provide help for them to change.
>> Reporter: Cga stands for criminals and gangmembers anonymous. Mejico founded the gup after he realize he could not let go of his violent gang lifestyle.
>> And i was going away fr m my alcohol problem, ut when i was on the yard, something was still wrong with me. I could see people that were enemies on the street and something would turn on in my head and I couldn't get it out.
>> Reporte here in prison?
>> Yea , that same obses on would return. And wanting to act.-
>> Reporter: Gang b nging runs in the mejico family. Richard has several relatives who have been killed or imprisoned including his son steve, now serving 16 to life for murder. When did your son come here?
>> Steve got here maybe a couple of years ago now. This is my home. >> Reporter: This is your ome?
>> Yeah. >> Reporter: Tight. Wow. Whoa. Very tight for two people. Father and son share the same cell. Ho hard was it watchingim walk into this rison?
>> Very painful. It's like itting on a clud the whole time saying watch out, i know what's happening you. I know what you are getting ready to do. I know the influences all around you.
>> Reporter: Powless to stop it.
>> Powerle .
>> Reporter: Nor could steve stop himself" he say the ties o the gang were too strong.
>> I told myself that was going to change en i had my rst son. It was so powerful, i didn'T. When i first got arrested i would change, and i didn't change. I told myself after i got arrested for murder that i was going to change. I didn't change. I got out again. I got busted again for murder. And I don't know if i was going to change, but i kept putting it off. Eventual@y I ran out of time.
>> Reporter:Artha mejico, steve's mother and richard's wife, has been left with two younger boyso raise alone. She says it ight sound odd, but she feels blessedded to have both her husband and son safe in il.
>> When you are looking at the lifestyle addiction and the choices you have when you are in a gang, you either have prison -or a cemetery. So whenou look at the two, i am blessed. They have a chance to change. They have a chance to do things differently.
>> Reporter: 16-year-old peter mejico hates what the gag life has done to his family.
>> Destruction. That's all it caused was de ruction to our family and pain a hurt, sorrow.
>> Reporter: But he is proud of his fat er's efforts to heal that hurt.
>> I l ve that man and respect him. And paus of w t he's done today and how he's helped so many people, i love him even more for that and i respect him s a person even more for tht. Because being in prison as long as he is, he could have just given up hope and he hasn'T.
>> Reporte in fact, he is now giving out hope.
>> E're not monster4 , we're not throwaways, we're people with proble s and now we're deang with those problems.
>> Reporter: But these are not your ordinaryroblems. And dealing with them requires taking some very big steps. 12 of them, to b exact.
[ Applause ] Reporter: >>> God, grant e the serenity to accepthe things i cannot change --
>> Reporter: It sounds le any other 12-step support group, alcoholics anonymous, overeaters anonymous, but with one bigig difference.
>> Good aftenoon, guys. M name is brother gil. I'm an excriminal.
>> Rep ter: These pri ners have committed terrible c mes from armed robbe to murder. Now they are committed to recovering, recovering from what th say is an addiction to that criminal lifestyle.
>> What is the lifes le addiction? It is the most vicious and powerful of destructive forces. Our beliefs are warped, our anners are deceptive.
>> Reporte the first step for all these men is huge -- to mit they are powerless over their problem and need help. Is runs counter to lifetime( of macho posturing.
>> When i would walk into a store, i had no feeling. Only to take. To want. Putting a gun in somebody's face I had no feelings for that. I had no feelings for myself.
>> It still haunts me every time I look into the mirror and look at the scars on my face . One afternoon we were all in the frt of the house and i hear some shots and i run to the front and i see my son layi g down on the fl or and my old lady was hit in the stomach. My nephew was shot. I just froze. I didn't know what to O. So i ran to my little kid. He wasn't moving. I didn't think about calling the ambulance, cops or anythg like that. First thi that came to my mind s, you know, it's about getback. I go to the neighborhood, what was don was done but i ended up shot in the head four times.
>> Reporter: For joe, aka, cricket, getting the courage to speak up took some time.
>> When i first came to cga, i& remember the first time i spoke. I cald every dy weak for crying and bas@ally spilling out their guts everybody. For being so honet. And admitting that they were insecure, that they had problems. But all it took was for c tain guys in that group to ait certain things about t mselves then I had to sit back nd say, wow, i felt the same thing.
>> Repter: Cga says the only requirementor membership is a willingness an desire to give up the criminal and gang lifestyle. To quote from their lite ature, no one's co cerned about what area ou're from, what you're favorite colors are, nor what neighborhood mig be tattooed on your skin. Those symbols may seem superficial but to these men they represe a sense of belonging, a sense of famil.
>> There are a few people unless you're a gang member can @understand. I didn't have that attoe.
>> Reporter: That's what was addictive to you, to give that up would be impossible for you?
>> It would be m ossible. It would be -- it would mean be g alone and that's what i was afraid of.
>> I'm a recovered criminal.
>> Reporter: To admit f ar, to admit any fault is a tall order& for men who have always been in deni .
>> But deep inside it is someone else's fault, it is my parents, it's the environment i was brought up, it's this, it's that. These men in this program come to a place where they identify that the only person at fault is themself. And when they make tha finding thin themself, that's the beginning for them t change who they are. >> Reporter: Richard mejico says -he used to feel his crime was justified. He murdered a rival gang member who had brutally r ed his girlfriend
>> Everything that she told me that happened to her, did the same to him. I put him in the trunk and took m back to the same place where they tore her clothesff and hit he in the face and raped her. And I told him, you'll die here.& This is where you killed her. And it's still hard for me to talk about that. The longer we repeat something, e worse it gets.
> Reporter: But he does talk out it. Only by taking responsibility for the pain inflicted on their victims, heays, can the men in this group make amends for what they've done.
>> We have a solution to stop crime. And for every one of us that can change one o us, that's one less victim.
>> Reporter:Is son the is following in his 12 footsteps.
>> No one was a killer when they were a kid. What hap ned? I was abo as innocent as they come. I hated everything that had to do with gangs. But by the time i was done, i gave my life for it. Where did i go wrong?
>> Reporter: The program, he says, has helpe him figure that out.
>> I'm not a victim of circumstances.
>> Reporter: You don't see it that way?
>> No, I'm a victim of my choices.
>> Reporter: For a long time, steve chose the gang as his fix. Pjust as drugs finally destroyed the addict, the gang finally turned on him.
>> Then sat in ourt and i watch d my own homeboy testify on me. And i watched him sit there and say all these things a ut me. I said, where's the loyalty h e where is the love , where is the spect, you know?
>> Reporter: Respect now comes from ithin.
>> In the majority of the men that are in ts program, that's e true statement. Ist a real change. What these men have found is that everything that they do is dictated by the state. The clothes they wear, the food they eat, where they sleep, where they work, those things are dictated by us. The only thing that they can do for themselves is change. >> I can't take back what i did.
>> Reporter: Although t program is supposed toe anonymous, the group voted to let us film their meeting why? Beca e they hope the program will catch o outside.
>> Th s message needs to get out not only for the sake of prisoners but for the sake of tose who are out there who can change,ost especially young people who have t into this lifestyl and who are entrenched in it.
>> Reporte quite a challenge, as these p soners would be the rst to admit.
>> Everyone always assumes t t the hardest persono change is those that don't want to change. But the hardest person o help change is those who think they've already changed. Ain't that something? Prisoners, oners, ers, ers,
>> Reporter: Right now mem rs of cga are primarily adult prisoners, but they hope their program will eventually catch on with younger gang members. And they found a way to ex ort their message to juvenie hall and its captive audience.
>> The lifestyle of gang activity is a bit of an addiction. Is it rd to get out of it.
>> Reporter: T s presentation marks the first time officials at this los angeles detenti facility have allowed youth@ul offenders to wtch a videotape pof a meeting of criminal nams and gang members anonymous.
>> See, my father raped my mother. That's how i was conceived.
>> Reporter: These teenagers who are charged with crimes so serious they will be tried as adults are riveted at the sight of real adults dropping the tough guy facade and sharing th@ir most shameful secrets in excruciateing detail.
>> The court gave me back to my mom. That's when a hell broke loose from day one i walked through the door , tossed me across the room. That's how i got the dent in my head. From hen on i learned to deal with all the -- that she dished ou to the point to where no matter what she did, i wouldn't cry. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction. I knew all abo pain. Broken fingers, broken hands, ribs, legs, nose, shattered eyesockets. I've been through all that. At the hands of my mother. I hold a lot of resentment and a lot of anger. When i was 10 i seen my mother kill my little brother's ather. By 12, somebody broke into our house. & He was raping my sister. I was scared. I grabbed a machete, close my eyes and i swung it. He died. By the time i was 14, i took a bottl of pills, tried to kill myself. By the time i was 15, my girlfriend was pregnant, somebody pushed her, she lost the baby, i beat him to death with a bat. There's so much pain,o much hurt, so mh anger, so much rage, so much frustration,ll kind of -- that goes on that you got to deal with, that I have to deal with and I' working through. I understand everything everybody here is saying even though we're from totally different places, different races, different backgroun , it doesn't matter. The pa is the same. It's all pain. It isll resentment. And the only way you c get to step nine is wk through your resentments and let it all go
>> When i got to the hospital --
>> Repoter: And they are rapt at the story of how a murderer, riard mejico, manag to turn his life around and find some peace o mind. Some of these kids re also faci life sentences.
>> These 12 steps put it all to perspective for me. I learned that people like me and like you, we have the fre will capacity to make choices ad decisions between good and evil.
>> Some of these guys have relationships with some of the families of their victims.
>> R orter: This volunteer hopes the cga program will take root here. She has seen the powerful hold ga life has onhese teenagers.
>> The issue is that the 12 steps work. It works in de tors anonymous, it works in overeaters. It works as a system for breaking down the problem and g tting into the solution and the being of service. That's how it works.
>> Reporter: Sheeaches meditation at juvenile hall. And she finds these kids remarkably receptive to anything that provides an alternative t a life of relentless violence.
>>Reathing in everything that you'd like to take on and everything you want to let go of.
>> Reporter: Anothe way the cga program can ravel beyond prison walls is through members who have been paroled. Danny used to ttend meetings at mule creek state pri N. Now he's hop g to carry the message to young gangembers in los angeles.
I can remember when i was their age, nobody could tell me anything either. But at some point people were pplanting seeds. You know? And it may no sprout or grow right then, but it will get them to thinking.
>> Reporter: E continues to st ggle with his own addict ns. A battle he fights one day at a time.
>> Sometimes in my head , I think well, I i on't have money, i know how to get it. I'm not saying we don't still think like that the difference today is tha we don't act on it.&
>> Reporter: Part of a 1(step program is making amends. For criminals that can be one hefty list. He ays he started by ma ing amends to his own family.
>> And they're not always accepting. You know, you've told us you're sorry fore. What's different now? And i don't have a response for that. I j t keep showing them that I'm going to continue doing the right thing. And one day my word w@l mean something.
>> Reporter: Parolees have lot of motivation to tay straight, but what motivates a man like richa d mejico serving a life sentence?
>> What richard has discovered is profound indeed. Becaus it is not about this will look good on my parole board. >> If i was to parole today, just this evening, wh all of my good deeds and all theork that i do there's no way that i can go to the cemetery with a shovel and dig up my ictim and say, you're paroled, too. So what i really want to do is se people out of here. Because a part of me goes out with everyone that i help.
>> Reporter: Cricket is about t be released from prison. He pl ns to work for cga on the outside, hopes to set up a few meetings, but h s afraid at the same time of slipping, slipping back into the ld lifestyle approximately .
>> I kn w there's a lot of temptations out there. I don't have any desire to go back to my neighborhood. The only desire i have is just to finally l e in peace and open my arms up to any of those pthat are willing tohange.
>> Reporter: As for steve mejico serving 16 to life, at first it was not easy adjusting to life with his father.
>> I wanted everything my way. And i wold justify everything and i make excuses. And i w ldn't take countability. And i was very selfish. And you you know, those are things that he revealed to me in a blunt way. You know? And i never, eer had no one talk to me like that. You ow?
>> Reporter: Has he taught you anything?
>> Yes. A lot more about humanity. A lot more about being a father. Because this is a part of me that I was lacking. I had children, but I didn't have them. And he was my really first experience.
>> Reporter: Steve dreams of the day when height be paroled. And so does his fathe
>> If there was any way that i could take his time fro him and do his life sentence with mine and send him home, i hink he's almost ready to o home. I wouldn't want to do it right nw. But a little bit longer. I would be willing to take every single day that they ould give me and send him home. I'd gladly do it.
>> Repor r: You say he's not read to go home. Why in.
>> Because I'm a father. I'm just being honest.
>> Reporter: Honesty is w at recovery is all about. One day at a the, even while doing time. I'mudy muller for "nightline" at mule creek state prison.
>> I'll be back in a momen.
>> Announcer: To receive a daily e-mail announcement about each evening's "nightline" and a preview of special broadcasts, logon to the "nightline" page at abcnews.Com. C
>>> Sunday on this week" with george stephanopoulos , the aministration's man in baghdad, ambassador paul bremer. And that's our report for tonight. I'm chris bury in washington. For all of us here at abc news, good night. <