Mammie...
Uno!
Holy shit!
What's wrong?
Um, will you excuse me
for just one second?
I have to, uh,
use the facilities upstairs.
Oh, but there's
a bathroom right there.
Oh, but it's a
petit numro due...
No!
You and I haven't really had
a chance to just chat alone yet,
have we, Mammie?
Yeah, well, they're--
They're always
doing something up there.
Um...
If we could just chat
for a second about the ring.
That's my great-grandmother's.
And I'm... I'm sensitive
to your condition, I really am,
so, no hard feelings.
But I'm just gonna reach down
and take my ring back, okay?
So I'm gonna just grab it.
Gordie!
Hey, man!
No, I'm fine.
I'm hanging out with the ladies.
I'm having a blast.
That's a great idea
you should go and have fun.
Okay, well...
To be continued!
What are we drinking next?
Shots!
Fucking shooters, mate.
Look, quality is everything.
And if that means importing
my lamb from New Zealand,
then that's what
I'm going to do.
Are you saying that the lamb
from my father's farm
is not as good as New Zealand's?
Well. I mean,
the difference might be slim,
but it is the difference between
excellence and perfection.
Yeah, just like
the slim difference
between being arrogant
and being full of shit?
Well,
someone is confident.
Yeah, 'cause I...
...I swapped out your lamb today
with meat from my father's farm,
and someone
didn't seem to notice.
You absolute assassin.
Hey!
Yo! Hey, Jordan, ostie!
It's Gordon.
Oh!
You hear that?
That's bone. That's a bone.
Daphne!
Is someone gonna help her?
I'm surprised to see you here.
Oh no, I love it. I love it.
I love violence of any kind.
Uh, yeah. Pain is my jam.
- Light change.
Look at the size of that guy!
He's pointing
at me. I didn't do anything!
Come on!
You're fighting?
Him?
Are you out of your mind?
He's like white Shrek!
Let's go!
Fight!
Whoa! That was good, huh?
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
Oui!
Oh!
Fuck yes! David beats Goliath!
He's gonna fight somebody else?
Oh fuck, yes!
Last time they fought,
they ended up in jail, man.
Are you kidding me?
They can't fight.
They're family.
No, false alarm!
Intermission! Intermission!
Call it off! Call it off, sorry!
Sorry, you guys cannot fight.
No, this is my
fault. I'm sorry. It's my fault.
Violence is not the answer.
Think of Sophie, of Ginette.
It's okay!
It gonna end up in two seconds.
- No, no.
- There's not gonna be a fight.
Just stop!
No!
Yeah!
No. No, no.
Again,
I'm so sorry, Alphonse.
No, no, don't be sorry.
It's their fault.
But Gordon did knock him out.
Very accidentally.
Still, you delivered the blow.
The good news is
that father and son
avoided going at it
in the kumite.
I have even better news.
I have a surprise
that will certainly
get you fixed up in no time.
Drum roll.
It's an expression.
You don't...
I have spoken to the network,
and we would be thrilled
to shoot an episode
of Ruby in Your Pantry
right here on your family farm!
I mean, great exposure
for the greatest lamb
in the world. Am I right?
I don't know what to say!
Well, say oui, ma chrie!
Thank you so much!
Wow...
- Wow!
- Thank you so much!
Can I be on TV, too?
Oh, but of course,
it's your farm!
I'm excited about it, too.
Of course she drives a Jag.
Bye! Love your pirate's blouse.
Wow!
This turned out to be
such a great night, right?
Oh, it was fabulous!
You got drunk
with your ex-girlfriend,
and I knocked out your father.
- And that's my fault?
- Yeah, it is.
Because if you hadn't
stood me up again,
I wouldn't have been invited
to family fucking fight club
or whatever that was.
Okay, you know what?
I don't want to do this tonight.
Well, you know what? I do.
I'm just saying, if you look
at things from my point of view,
it feels like I can't
do anything right,
unlike Ruby, who can do
absolutely no wrong.
I can't believe
you're making this about you
when her show can save this farm
from going out of business.
Going out of business?
What are you talking about?
Going out of business?
My dad told me
that they're on the brink
of bankruptcy, okay?
Ruby is just trying to help.
So, you told Ruby,
but you didn't tell me?
I've been spending
more time with her.
I haven't seen you
as much, come on.
Really?
I hadn't noticed.
Oh, my God!
All right,
you know what?
It's been a long week.
Let's just get some sleep.
You've been reading
way too much into this.
You're right, I'm sorry.
I should be happy for you guys.
I didn't know that. I'm sorry.
I just miss you.
I miss you too, honey.
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
Psst! Hey!
All right, I'll-
I'll take her back to bed.
No, you know what?
Let me, let me.
Are you sure?
Yeah, yeah.
Come on, you're tired.
Let me do one thing right
in this house.
All right.
I got it.
Hey, Mammie.
Let's get you back to bed
before the storm hits, okay?
I got you.
All right, Mammie.
There you go.
Time to count some sheep before
your son slaughters them all.
I do need to get
my ring back, though, Mammie.
Just while you're dozing...
Farmer knuckles!
Come on...
Oh, hey! She wandered
into our room, sweet old gal.
I think
she was probably sleepwalking.
I've been tasked
with putting her down again.
You can close it out
if you want to.
We did it. We did it.
Sweet dreams, Mammie.
I'll just get by you.
Do you want me
to sing to your baby?
Oh, I'm good.
Okay.
Oh!
...eroticism.
Mm.
We gotta talk, Coucou!
It's a rule of thumb, okay?
I before E, except after C
or when sounding as A
as in "Neighbor" or "Weigh."
You know what? Forget about it.
Can we take a break?
I am tired, man.
I'm frankly very tired
of my girlfriend
spending every single night
until 2:00 in the morning
with Ruby,
drinking and laughing
and doing all the things
in my mind
that I pray to God
they're not doing.
...smash her legs,
like, you know,
like Tonya Harding.
First of all,
very well-crafted sentence.
But I am gonna pass.
Hey.
Guess what? Best news ever!
Ruby has to do a reshoot
for her show,
which means
I have the night off.
Are you serious?
Yeah, baby!
I'm on my way.
Junior, class dismissed.
- Anglais.
- Okay, um...
would you mind
taking my picture?
I, uh, I have to send it
to my super-hot boyfriend
who's been desperately lonely.
Why don't you forget about him
and fall in love
with a very handsome
English teacher from Brooklyn?
Okay!
You look amazing.
This is so pretty.
Thank you,
- thank you, thank you. So do you.
- Wow!
Where are we going?
I don't know.
It's not the kind of cooking
I really ever thought I'd do,
but I'm getting into it.
And I mean...
living in this city,
with my family,
it really would be amazing.
I think you're
gonna get the job.
I don't have it yet.
Baby, you're gonna get the job.
I have a surprise
for you.
I got the Chteau
to comp us a room tonight.
Shut up!
- Are you serious?
- Mm.
I am gonna miss sleeping
in that waterbed, though.
I don't think we'll be
doing too much sleeping.
What are we gonna be doing?
I don't know.
Bingeing a series?
You're gonna love her.
Did I ever tell you
that she's the first person
- to make me a sous-chef?
- No.
Yeah!
Sophie!
All!
Merci!
Merci!
Bon apptit.
Mm. By the way,
you can order anything you want,
because dinner is on the house.
Look at this! What?
Oh, yay! You know what?
No, I'll pour it.
You don't have to.
Thank you so much.
Merci beaucoup.
Merci!
Look at you!
Baby, come on, free champagne
and free dinner, and free hotel.
I'm blown away. You are
the queen of Quebec City.
- And you are my king, monsieur.
- Oh, thank you, darling.
Um, before we toast
to this great night,
I just wanted to let you know
that I see how supportive
you've been,
and it's meant so much to me.
There you are!
The woman I have been hunting.
Ruby, I... I thought
you were shooting.
Oh, that's why they call me
the one-take wonder, darling.
I spoke to your dad,
and he told me
you guys
were having dinner here.
Oh! All, Solange, babe!
Hi, Ruby!
I wanted you to meet
my good friend, Avi Donaldson.
Good friend? Best friend.
After the reviews
I've written for her, Jesus.
It's true.
I'm sorry. My bestie
and the most important
food critic in London.
His wit is as cutting
as his reviews.
Mademoiselle. My God!
You are even more
stunning than she rhapsodized.
Obviously,
I've been chatting you up.
Mind if we join you guys
for a quick drink?
Um, it's just that--
It's just that what?
Nothing. I mean, a drink
sounds really nice,
right, Gordon?
It does sound nice,
but this is a two-top,
and with the fire code,
I'm a little concerned
about exiting safely.
Oh, don't worry, Gordie.
We won't stay long.
He's got a flight to catch.
Carpe diem, as the Latins say.
- Carpe fucking diem.
- Whoo! Ladies!
Excuse my reach.
I could have passed it, bro.
What are we drinking to?
Well, not to make
tonight about me...
Please do.
I'm about to close
a five-year deal
with a major streamer
who shall remain nameless.
Rhymes with Petflix.
Hulu.
No, it's Netflix.
Ah!
Which will put us in over
200 million homes worldwide.
Are you serious?
That's... that's fantastic!
Mm-hmm.
It's bloody brilliant!
And we are almost out of bubbly.
Well, we had plenty
until you poured two thermoses
over there.
We're gonna actually order
some appetizers, right, baby?
Thank God. I am famished.
Mademoiselle!
Right away. I'm not a figment
of your imagination.
Uh, 36 oysters.
Don't fob us off with any
of that Nova Scotia bullshit.
I want Prince Edward Island.
Malpeques, babe.
We can do separate checks,
not everyone together.
He's joking, right?
Yeah.
Of course he's fucking joking.
You are joking?
Yeah, I'm joking.
Hilarious. Cheers!
To jokes!
To jokes.
Ah, so funny!
So, we hadn't caught
anything in hours,
when Ruby suddenly notices
something bobbing in the water.
It was a dolphin that was caught
in some old fishing net.
The poor thing had been
struggling for days,
if not weeks.
Have you ever seen
an emaciated dolphin?
No.
It's awful.
Like models in the '90s.
I mean, attractive, obviously,
but deeply unhealthy.
Anyway, um,
without batting an eye,
- Aqua Girl over here...
- Oh, stop it.
No, but keep going.
It's a great story.
...dove into
the frigid Atlantic,
cutting free
the majestic cetacean.
It was the right thing to do.
Yeah.
Fuck me, it was incredible.
It swam alongside
the boat for hours,
just grateful to be alive
'cause of this goddess.
Well, I think
it had more to do
with the mackerel
we were feeding it.
Or because the DJ on board
was absolutely crushing it.
Oh, they really were.
They were really good, yeah.
Anyway, enough
of Ruby's heroics.
Gordon, I'm being so rude.
I haven't asked
what it is you do.
Oh, um, I'm an academic.
Oh, a professor!
Pray tell us, which university's
hallowed halls
do you grace with your insights?
- I teach eight grade English.
- Yeah.
Teacher of the year,
two years in a row.
Hey, that's not nothing.
Man, I was a terrible student.
Kicked out of high school.
But I think we can all agree
that traditional schooling
is a bit antiquated.
Oh, yeah...
Oh, Sophie didn't tell me
you were also an expert
in education reform.
Come on, Gordon.
I'm not trying
to shit on your job.
I'm just saying
that there are other ways
to forge a path to success.
Exhibit A.
And what an exhibit it is!
Excuse me, I'm gonna go
forge a path to the urinal.
Okay.
Is he mad at us?
Oh, fucking asparagus!
It must have been in the potage.
What's potage?
Soup.
Come on, mate.
Well, it looks like
I'm missing my flight.
Yeah, so much
for that quick drink, huh?
Free word of advice, friend.
I don't know you very well,
but Ruby, I do know.
And let me tell you,
when a woman like that
sets her sights on something,
she always gets what she wants.
What is that supposed to mean?
Did she say something to you?
A woman like that doesn't
need to say much, does she?
That's even more cryptic.
Is it? Is it?
He's right.
You gotta do it tonight.
You don't need a ring.
You don't need
her father's blessing.
You just need
the balls to do it.
Carpe fucking diem. Let's go.
Sophie, there's something
I want to ask you.
What's wrong? What happened?
It's Mammie. She's dead.
No!
- Oh, my God!
- Oh...
Are we sure?
They're coming
to get her already?
I thought
we had more time.
But we don't.
Uh, babe, you look chilly.
Let me just
grab you a sweater, okay?
- Yeah. Thanks, babe.
- Okay. I love you.
This is crazy.
Gotta get the ring.
It's for Sophie, Mammie.
I'm so sorry.
Work with me, okay, on this?
Oh! Your lips are so cold.
Yes!
Oh!
Hey.
What's going on?
I'm just paying
my respects.
She's been so kind to me
ever since I got here, so...
Mm-hmm.
She looks so peaceful, you know?
Yeah, that's how she's been
since I've been here, just...
just resting in peace.
It's hard to lose a mother.
I do know that.
Oh, I'd like to
share something, Father.
Um, I am a woman of few words.
Then just shut up.
It's a little something
I wrote last night,
so just bear with me.
Imagine strings.
What's happening?
She's singing.
I know. I'm just...
It's so beautiful.
Right.
Thank you for the song.
It was really gorgeous,
beautiful.
Yeah, anytime.
I'm here for you.
Bring it in.
Yeah. I've been selling weed,
like, since I was a little kid.
Oh, congrats.
They called me
the Cowboy du Cannabis.
But then
the government made it legal,
which sucked huge.
Yes.
I'm still in agriculture.
Good.
Don't you worry.
I have a small grow-op
of coniferous trees.
Oh, cool!
Yeah,
Christmas is pretty big
in New York City as well.
Oh yeah? You want a tree?
No, thank you. It's July.
Exactly.
Give you a good price!
Quite a performance.
Oh, it was a straight
from the heart.
It wasn't even rehearsed.
Yeah, I could tell.
Uh, listen, I don't want
to overstep any boundaries,
but I do think
it's probably a good idea
to go ahead
and cancel the shoot.
I think it would
give those of us
who are actually in the family
a little... a little space
to grieve, you know,
in private, without the circus
of a reality television show.
Nah. The show must go on.
That's not really a thing.
That's a saying
they use in show business.
It's, uh, not something
that applies
to real-world tragedy.
We're in the middle of a...
Alphie, you poor man.
I'm sorry to interrupt.
Oh, no.
Um, but I've been giving it
a lot of thought,
and maybe we should reschedule.
We'll give your family
the appropriate amount of time
to grieve without the circus
of reality television.
That is so considerate of you.
Yeah, sounds a bit like
what I just said
two seconds ago in the kitchen.
Ruby's right, Dad.
We should reschedule.
Yeah, Ruby said it,
but I... I said it to Ruby,
and now you know it,
and now she sort of
disseminated it to the group.
And now I think
we're all on the same page
that the appropriate thing
is to have some time to grieve.
No.
The show must go on.
It really must!
Hi, Gordie.
Mm.
Flow like, uh,
water. Comme Bruce Lee.
I liked your
Tonya Harding idea better.
We're gonna do things
a little differently today,
seeing as that our host's pantry
is an entire farm.
And not just any plot of land,
but the greatest supplier
of organic meats
on this side of the world.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you the Tremblay family!
Say "bonjour,"
you French Canadian phenoms.
Bonjour!
We're gonna start things off
with a duck hunt
with this gorgeous fam,
followed by a confit
I will prepare
with the daughter
of these lands,
chef extraordinaire
Sophie Tremblay.
That's my girlfriend.
What do you say, Sophie?
I say
let's get out of the pantry
and shoot some birds.
Bang, bang!
Pow, pow, pow!
Oh, boy!
Oh, no!
Good day for it, huh?
- Hey, hey, hey!
- What, um...
....what are you wearing?
What? Is the hat too much?
No, no, you just...
look like you're gonna repair
a cell tower.
Oh. I spoke to Mr. Bouchard
at the hunting shop,
and I just said, "Give me
the best money can buy."
He hooked me up with all this.
You know,
it's fully reflective,
head to toe.
Head to toe, I can see that.
Yes.
Okay, I'm sensing
I may have been upsold a bit.
But you know what?
Don't laugh at me,
because I come
from British stock.
Hunting is in my blood.
Oh, yeah?
'Cause I remember you crying
when that pigeon flew into
our living-room window and died.
Yeah, 'cause we couldn't
eat it. A wasted death.
Or am I misreading this,
and Ruby said
this was for the family
and you don't want me
to be included, right?
What? Babe, no. No, no, no.
You're always included.
You know that, right?
Okay. Good.
I want to be part of things.
- I wanna-- All right,
- Yeah. Yeah.
I want to hunt.
You're part of all of it.
Come here.
Has anyone seen Gordon?
Anyone?
Ha, ha! Very funny.
Though duck hunting
may seem barbaric,
it's actually very important
for our ecosystems.
This is fun, hey, babe?
I'm just so excited
to assassinate
something majestic!
Yes!
Fuck off.
Shooting blanks, Gordo?
I had the, uh, the safety on.
But safety first!
I got a fish!
Yeah, great! See?
I knew you had it in you!
Oh! So supportive.
It's not a sport,
it's a massacre.
Thing just wants to fly.
I got one!
Shooting blanks...
He's huge! He's a biggun!
Oh no!
False alarm!
False alarm, guys.
I didn't get anything.
Stop being humble, Gordon.
You gotta celebrate your kill!
My kill wants privacy.
Oh, my God, Gordon,
that's not a duck,
that's a swan.
Oh, no, Coucou!
Hey, shit, dude!
I... I got blinded by the sun,
and I... I thought
it was a... a large duck.
Also, in my defense,
I think I may have
gotten a bad kazoo,
'cause this definitely
calls swans.
I think it's time
to turn in your gun, Golden Eye.
Let's cut, guys. Okay?
Should we cut
for a second, please?
Our duck has
roasted in its fat
for about an hour and a half,
and now, the meat should
literally fall off the bone.
Mm! Look at all those juices
caressing the thighs.
Nice and moist,
just the way I like it.
Perfect. Now I would like
to bring out Monsieur Tremblay!
Come on over,
Alphie, you musky hunk!
I would like to announce
that Tremblay Farms
will be the sole lamb supplier
for my new restaurant, Ruby,
at the Chteau Frontenac,
opening this summer
in gorgeous Quebec City.
For real?
Well, thank you!
And a special shout out
to the original gangster,
the Tremblay matriarch,
Mammie Tremblay.
May you grace the farmlands
of heaven for all of eternity.
Cut! Best show ever!
Ruby! Ruby!
Ruby! Ruby! Ruby! Ruby!
Ruby, Ruby, Ruby...
I was freaking out!
It did not show on camera?
I felt like I was on, like,
this buzz, like my lips were...
my lips were
sticking to my teeth.
I was sweating.
I couldn't...
No.
No, shut up, honestly.
You were incredible.
I mean, you'll get phone calls
for your own show from this.
I'm telling you.
You're beautiful.
Phone's gonna be ringing.
Okay, madame.
So, Ruby,
you're a Jag girl, huh?
I would have thought
you'd drive, like,
an electric car
to set a good example
for your legions of followers.
Well, not to throw my bestie,
Elon, under the Hyperloop,
but some experts say
that those batteries
are more toxic
to the environment
than CO2 emissions.
Well, I think your experts
are full of shit.
I think you're jealous
I drive a collectible.
Well, you can collect...
Keep working on that.
Everyone! Attention,
s'il vous plat!
Ruby has a speech, everybody!
Gather 'round!
Maybe there'll be a song.
Well, Sophie, it has been
an epic two weeks.
Yeah.
And in that time,
I've seen you
explode out of your chrysalid
like a fiery monarch.
So I wanted to take
this opportunity,
in front of your entire family,
to offer you the executive chef
position at the Chteau.
You won the job!
Hey!
Surprise!
I want to make a speech, too.
I got a speech, too!
I got a...
I got a speech, too, everybody.
Uh, thank you
for your attention.
All just really beautiful.
Babe, I love you so much.
And she's right,
you're incredible.
You're incredible,
and I love you.
And it's just to me, personally,
it's a shame that you're gonna
be wasting your talents
on some poser chef's
vanity project.
- Gordon...
- No.
I mean, that was a power move,
swooping in and saving
the entire farm from bankruptcy.
I mean, hats off to you.
You gotta win over
the dad, right?
That's enough.
Yeah, I agree with Alphonse.
It's enough.
It's enough with the fucking
restaurant and the lip line
and the fucking all this.
I've had enough of it.
The girl who can't do wrong.
Whereas everyone thinks I'm
the guy who kills fucking swans
and punches fathers in the face.
At this point, you probably
all think I killed Mammie!
I didn't kill Mammie.
I didn't kill Mammie.
I'm not going
to the chicken house!
You shouldn't be
living in a chicken house!
I bet you're really good in bed.
Is she good
in bed, baby?
Or do you need a refresher,
because I'm sure
she'll give you one.
Someone should be
using the waterbed.
What are you doing?
Fuck!
Sophie, wait, wait, wait!
What the hell
is wrong with you?
I'm sorry, I was tryna be funny.
Everyone was laughing.
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry!
- So I only got this job
because she wants
to sleep with me?
Is that what you think?
Forget about all the hard work
that I've put into this, right?
Well, admit there's
a chance I'm right.
Did you ever
want me to have this?
Do you want to have it?
Because we have
a pretty fucking great life,
where you're cooking food
that you love.
But I don't know, Sophie.
Maybe there aren't
enough cameras around.
Okay, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I have ambition.
I'm sorry
that she believes in me.
Believes in you?
She's in love with you!
Are you kidding me?
How do you not see that?
You definitely see that, right?
And of course she is,
because you're fucking perfect!
But I think you need
to admit to yourself
that you're also
still in love with her.
She did break your heart, right?
Yeah. Yeah,
she broke my heart.
And then I left her.
And I found you.
And then,
she came crawling back...
and you thought,
"Maybe I could sleep my way
to a Michelin star."
I think you should go.
You heard her.
I did.
And remember,
if you can't handle the heat,
throw on some oven mitts,
because everyone
belongs in the kitchen.
Till next time!
Sophie...
Hey!
Thank you so much, man.
I really appreciate it.
I couldn't show my face
after everything that happened.
Here you go.
So humiliating.
Anyway, how is she?
She was gone
before I woke up.
Right.
It's the big night, huh?
Forget about all that.
Are you ready?
Are you ready
to crush this test?
I'm so nervous,
I could piss my legs, you know.
"Piss my pants"
is the expression,
but I doubt
that's gonna come up.
Don't worry.
Thanks for believing in me,
Gordon.
You're a good guy.
Go make me proud, okay?
Kick ass. Do it for Van Damme.
Yeah.
Hey...
She still loves you.
Good luck!
("L'AMOUR L'AMOUR L'AMOUR"
BY BON ENTENDEUR
AND MOULOUDJI PLAYING)
Can we have someone else come
and bring these out?
Right away!
Voil, chef.
Merci!
Ah!
Merci!
Merci beaucoup!
VIP!
Ah, cool.
Oh!
I'm flying out on the red eye.
So, that's it?
What do you mean?
Have you not been listening?
It's over. I lost.
Honey, I love you.
But you've played it safe
way too long.
You've never left
this neighborhood. I mean,
you teach at the high school
that you went to.
And that's
a little bit my fault.
When your mother passed away,
I did everything I could
to protect you, and I...
I think I turned you
into a bit of a pussy.
Are you trying to be helpful?
She's a fighter, Gordon!
It runs in her family.
So, fight back and show her
you're not down for the count.
That's what marriage is!
If you get on that plane, son,
you'll be giving up
the greatest thing
that's ever happened to you.
And as much as I'd love
to keep you close,
I'd rather have you living
happily in another country
than be miserable in Brooklyn.
Also, for Christ's sakes,
would you get me
a goddamn Canadian passport?
I can't just show up, Dad, okay?
This is the biggest night
of her life.
I'm the last person in the world
she wants to see.
I'm gonna make an ass of myself.
That's exactly
what you have to do!
Holy shit, you're right!
Wow!
Oh!
Pretty
effin delish, am I right?
Oh! Don't forget
to eat the plates.
They're made entirely
out of compressed crab.
Oh! So good!
Okay, bon apptit!
No.
Hey, hey!
I'm so sorry.
Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh!
I've never done this in
my life before, I swear. I-I...
I need to, um... I don't know
how to say it en franais.
Uh, I need to...
Are you on the list?
I am on the list.
Yeah?
Well, I was on the list.
It's been a pretty crazy
24 hours,
and I don't know
if I'm still on the list.
It really depends on when
the list was created and edited.
So, if you look,
it's Gordon Kinski.
- Kin... With a K?
- Yeah.
Kinski. No, you're not.
But I hear Cirque du Soleil
is hiring right now.
Can I just talk to you
mano a mano for just one second?
This is one of those
times in life
where you can really step up
and do the right thing,
because my future, my happiness,
my true love is in there,
and I need your help
to make things right.
There's a fork in the road.
It's all in your tiny, beautiful
little manicured hands.
What do you say? Please,
I'm begging you, let me in.
Hey,
I'm just storming the castle.
How's your night going?
("LAISSE UNE CHANCE
NOTRE AMOUR"
BY CLAUDE FRANOIS PLAYING)
Soph.
Hey.
You know,
I just wanna say, I'm sorry
about everything
Gordon has put you through.
You're handling yourself
like a true pro.
Thanks. It's a little
overwhelming, but...
With great success
comes a ton of jealousy.
Believe me, I know.
But the sooner you cut
those toxic people
out of your life,
the higher you can fly.
Gordon.
Alphonse.
You got
a lot of nerve coming here.
You're right. Last night
I was a complete asshole.
I'm so sorry.
I was totally drunk
and insecure.
I'm not making excuses.
I... I take full responsibility.
But I love your daughter,
and I'm not giving up
that easily.
I want to ask you
for her hand in marriage.
We're magic together.
And I don't just mean
in the kitchen.
Why pretend?
We both want this.
Oh, my God!
You are the last person
I would ever want to be with.
Things change.
Sometimes, for the best.
Don't you know how much
I've done for you?
You called me, okay?
So don't act like
you're some kind of savior here.
Okay, I'm sorry,
but who saved your shitty
family farm from bankruptcy?
She deserves to be happy.
Yeah.
I'm sorry I killed your swan.
I want you
to remember this moment.
When you could have
been something,
but you threw it all away
and went back to being nothing.
'Cause that's what you are
without me. You're nothing.
And I want you
to remember this moment...
when I broke your
perfect little nose.
What the fuck?
Oh, not the face! Malcolm!
Hey, hey, hey!
Huh?
Yes.
Guys...
You want me out of here, Ruby?
I'm out of here.
As soon as I figure out
how to drive manual.
Okay, here we go.
Here we go!
- Hey!
- Sorry!
Come on!
Gordon!
Hey, all!
Okay.
Ease it out.
Ease it out. Come on!
In second gear.
You know what, I do need to...
Clutch down.
Where are you, two? Is that it?
Oh! Merci.
No, no, no!
I'm just borrowing it, sir!
Oh, shit!
Yes! I am the best
at car chases!
A lot of grinding...
Clutch down.
Yeah, second gear, yes!
Yes! Yes!
Yes! No, no, no!
Shit!
Hey!
Hey, sweetie!
I had the most
horrible dream, babe.
I saw you kiss Ruby...
and then I drove her car
into a building.
That all happened.
But she kissed me,
and I punched her in the face.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh! That makes me so happy.
What about your job?
I quit.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I'm sorry.
I'm not.
There's something
I wanted to ask you.
Will you marry me?
Where did you get that?
When the nurses
cut your pantaloons off,
they found it in your pocket.
They destroyed my pantaloons?
They did.
They were rented.
But, babe, I wanted to ask
your father's permission first.
It's important to me.
Alphonse?
You have my blessing.
Welcome to the family, Gordie!
So?
I love you so much.
Give me your beautiful finger.
Oh, my God!
Ah, baby,
my ribs are... Careful, okay.
Ah! Ow!
Oh, babe! Ow! Ow!
As Cassius famously
said to Brutus:
"It is not in the stars
to hold our destiny...
but in ourselves."
That's not gonna be on the test.
It's just a quote
I really like.
Remember, oral exams
are Tuesday.
- One minute each!
- Don't worry.
When I oral,
it's always at least one minute.
Double-entendre
from Robert, everybody.
Alphonse!
Hey, Gordie!
All!
Hey!
So,
can you grab these?
Merci.
Hey, everybody!
Amazing!
Oh!
So, Junior, you're a cop, huh?
Yes, sir!
You ever shot anyone?
Uh, no.
But my girlfriend and I,
we tased a bike thief yesterday.
I'm the one
who saw him first.
I could have tased him.
I don't give a rat's ass,
as long as someone was tased
and justice was served.
Dad, can you watch
your language?
There's a toddler here.
Oh, sorry.
Oh, by the way,
Peter,
I loved your Widow's Hammock.
My goodness! Thank you, Ginette.
I hope I'm not overstepping.
But he will, watch.
But would you consider
being the cover model
for my next book?
- Cover model!
- Yes.
You wanna take it
easy there, l'anglais.
She'd be so happy.
You know,
I never told you,
I have a pretty funny story
about her and the ring.
You do? Really?
No, it wasn't
actually that funny.
It was pretty traumatic,
so never mind.
What?
Ben, yes.
No.
What story
about my mother?
There will be
no chou-fleur until you tell us.
No, jamais.
How about a toast
to change the subject?
It's "Familla"?
Famille.
la familla.
Famille.
la famille.
la famille!