kebbie pebbles … MINI ???
have no thoughts rn other than wanting to throw out my compliments now and say damn kevin moon someone pull out the measuring tape and hyunjae we need to measure those shoulders for the greater good
okay Mr HotShot. Mr Booked&Busy … out here in programs and magazines 🤨 ROLL OUT THE RED CARPET !
you’ve been looking hella good (as always) like jaw-clenching-ly good nudge nudge winkwink
anyhow ! this being a kebbie pebbles mini it’s more of just a mind scrabble.. somehow i’m always thinking about fancafe to layout my words right where my dear dear kpop boy man, kevin moon, can read lol
long story short, had my last last laaaast day of proper school ever before exams and i guess. everything’s slowly hitting me
it’s been a weird past couple years of school… in the moments i’ve dreaded it i’ve come out realizing i’m fortunate enough to even be in this situation — odd way to phrase it ?
long story short let’s just say my yeargroup hasn’t exactly had the best record of things, even pre-pandemic, so when the pandemic hit it felt like a face full of sand. maybe i’m being over dramatic but euuuh, could’ve been better lol. i mean cmon the disasters go from prom being cancelled an hour before it started to only few of us graduating
crazy lol
on the last day students who are leaving, tradition is to sign shirts,, unfortunately in the last week, could say for a lot of people, our crazy supportive teacher who’s fought so much for us wasn’t present and rumors stressed us quite a lot but we were there for one another.
by the end of the day students who’d been in the school since the start (me) were asked to take a picture together and i realized how few of us there was.. i hugged a friend and what i didn’t expect was a face full of tears accompanied with ‘you have no idea how much you’ve helped me through tough times’
i didn’t think i would cry but i did .. as someone who thought i was just another face in the crowd, i never knew i became a stem of support for others.
reading all the inside jokes, meaningful interactions, being their first friend it became evident through the synonyms of ‘thank you’ scribbled on my shirt .. close to first, seen almost everywhere was ‘never change’
with all that people wrote to me and i guess my emotions were delayed or still even processing at this moment .. somehow you came across in my mind probably because. you’re in the same position (?)
to be a source of comfort for others, is something i really only thought my silly idols would have the ability to do — heck i only realized this year as someone who never looked up to celebrities, you guys were the first people i genuinely admired (soz gotta slip in my compliments)
idk why i’m having difficulty writing right now— what i’m trying to say is; i don’t know how to feel knowing i’ve become that source of comfort to others. even if i’m not an idol ? even when i’m not that significant ? i don’t know, my minds been a connect the dots but the dots aren’t connecting
‘you never never found value in the things you do for others which is why you considered your acts for others to be normal’ told to me by my favorite teacher who wasn’t present. meant a lot to me .. lead me to having a full blown crisis just like now lol
within the school year let’s say my bridge of trust with adults, fell apart. phrases like that i would continue thinking ‘others have had it worse’ but lately i’ve just been accepting it — telling myself it’s okay to feel the way i do because there’s a reason behind it.
gosh for a first i have no idea what the future holds for me which i guess leads to me asking kevin moon
how do you prepare for the absolute unknown?
throughout the year i’ve asked all my teachers ‘how did you know you wanted to become a teacher?’ and oddly enough they all didn’t expect to be one. as they were telling their stories i found one consistency; they had no idea what they were doing. even teachers who haven’t taught me (somehow knowing me 🤨) relayed advice to me
jokes aside i’m keeping my head up, having the mentality that things will fall into place.. another common phrase teachers wrote on my shirt
must be odd, a few letters ago i said i realized what i wanna be; easy to say this year hasn’t been the nicest so it’s been hard to see the goal at times but ! maybe me writing all this was just helping me getting a load off lol
did things get better after that crazy thursday night, hard to say
actually writing all this reminded me of one vlive you did a while back looking through your yearbook and coincidentally as i was reading over pieces of paper with longer messages on ..
watch out world lol
anyhow ! could be randomly inserting more compliments to you at the end of the letter but wanted to just ease off .. thanks for reading kevin moon
things are getting busy busy busyyy ! this is a reminder that you’re probably tense right now, relax those shoulders and unclench that jaw ^^ as always eat well, sleep well and stay safe ♡
sending lots and lots of virtual hugs (and hisses for morty!) from qatar, to korea ♡
— eri ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ ♡
ps. i finally finished my memory wall of over 3 years :))! realizing candid photos werent the only fun in a good memory; collecting the most random sh!t with the date scribbled on doubled the fun
notice the colour transition? literally point to anything on here i can tell you the backstory to. since i still have a load of scraps in a memory box im gonna transfer them to a journal !
if im remembering right you’re also decoing your room ! nudge nudge winkwink— heyyy a world tours happening too lol maybe a good time to start collecting too
have fun kebbers ! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) ♡
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